Modern Family 台词117Truth Be Told.docx

Modern Family 台词117Truth Be Told.docx

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ModernFamily台词117TruthBeTold

Claire:

Hey,honey,Hughgranthasa...

Phil:

Notin...

Claire:

okay,well,Alexhasacellolessonatelevenandjuniorcongressatnoon.

Haley:

Doesn'tshealsohavenoboysatforever?

Alex:

Don'tyouhaveaneatingdisorderyouneedtoattendto?

Claire:

Yeah,anyway,uh,wecouldseethe4:

00orthe6:

20.

Phil:

Oh,actually,that'snogood.I'mmeetingmyfriendDeniseforadrink?

Claire:

Denise?

DoIknowDenise?

Phil:

Yeah,youknow,myoldgirlfriend.

Haley:

Oh,mygod.Gross.Ican'tevenpictureyouwithawoman.

Claire:

Thankyou.

Luke:

Youhadagirlfriendbeforemom?

Phil:

Trytwo.Trustme.Ihadplentyoffuninmytime.AndthenImetyourmom.

Claire:

Andthankyou.

Phil:

So,uh,IguessshetravelsaroundsellingmakeupForacosmeticscompany.She'sintownforaweek.

Alex:

Youmeanshe'slikeadoor-to-doorsalesman?

Luke:

Ifyouweredoingit,They'dcallitadork-to-dorksalesman.

Phil:

Ohh!

Myboystrikeslikearattlesnake!

Alex:

Oh,yeah?

Well...well,you...

Claire:

Wow.Allright,well,wecanseethemovietomorrow.Comeon.It'stimeforyourlesson.

Luke:

Youmeanhersecondlesson,becauseshejustgotschooled.

Alex:

What'swrongwithmetoday?

Claire:

Shakeitoff,champ.It'snotyourday.

Manny:

Hey.

Gloria:

Ay.Goodmorning,papi.

Manny:

Isit?

Gloria:

Aw,you'restillsadbecauseofthataudition.

Manny:

Thatpartwasmine.IwasborntoplayTevye.InsteadtheygiveittoRodJackson?

Whatdoesheknowfromsuffering?

Jay:

Howwedoing?

Gloria:

Alittlebetter,Butwe'regonnagoandthrowicecreamattheproblem.

Jay:

Well,ifthatdoesn'twork,thisshoulddothetrick.

Manny:

"whatdoesn'tkillusmakesusstronger."

Jay:

Wecanhangthisinyourroom.Youcanseeiteverymorning,starttointernalizeit.Prettysoon,nothingwillkeepyoudown.

Manny:

Butit'snottrue.

Jay:

Whatareyoutalkingabout?

Manny:

Lotsofstuffthatdoesn'tkillyoumakesyouweaker.Myfriend'sgrandfatherhadaheartattack.Nowheneedsamachinetobreathe.

Gloria:

I'veseenhimatthesupermarket.Nowheneedstodriveoneofthoselittle,like...

Jay:

Yeah,that'sright.Benegative.

Gloria:

It'sjustnotagoodposter,Jay.

Jay:

You'reonlymakingmestronger.

[OPENINGCREDITS]

Mitchell:

Didyoupackthe,uh,breadfortheducks?

Cameron:

Yes.

Mitchell:

Notthewhole-wheatkind.Theducksdon'tlikethat.

Cameron:

They'reducks,Mitchell.Theydon'tcare.

Cameron:

WebothbelievethatanimalsShouldplayabigpartinLily'slife.Havinggrownuponafarm,Iwassurroundedbythem.Theyweremorelikebrothersandsistersthanjust,youknow,livestock.

Mitchell:

Deliciousbrothersandsisters.

Cameron:

Lifeonafarm...theyknowwhatthey'regettinginto.

Mitchell:

Eesh.

Mitchell:

Wait.Oh,it'stheoffice.

Cameron:

Don'tanswerit.

Mitchell:

Ihaveto.

Cameron:

It'slikethiseverySaturday.Justignoreit.

Mitchell:

Well,maybeit'snotthatthistime.Hello?

Cameron:

Yeah.

Jay:

That'snice.Holy...Shel?

Youallright,buddy?

Cameron:

Oh,there'sfourofthem,Mitchell!

They'regivingherlittleduckkisses,andshe...oh,she'slaughing!

Ican'tbelieveyou'remissingthis.

Mitchell:

Well,whynot,Cam?

I'vemissedeverythingelse.SherolledoverwhenIwasinPhoenix.ShestartedscootingenIwasincourt.

Cameron:

Well,justtellthemyou'renotcomingin.Youdoenoughforthem.

Mitchell:

Well,youknowthat,Iknowthat,youknow?

Theonlyonewhodoesn'tknowthatismysuckyboss.He'sthesuckiestsuckofalltime.He'samiserablesonofabitchwho...MayhaveheardeverythingIjustsaid.

Claire:

Hihoney!

Whenareyougettingtogetherwithyourgalpal?

Phil:

Actually,Iwasjustcheckingonthat.She'ssupposedtosendmeamessage.

Claire:

Ohh.You'reFacebookfriends.

Phil:

Suream.Oh...She'soneofmy447friends.Everybodywantsaslice.

Claire:

Howlonghaveyoutwobeenintouchwitheachother?

Phil:

Uh,shetrackedmedownaboutayearago.

Claire:

Mm.Mm,mm.

Phil:

What?

What's...what'sthatsound?

Claire:

Mm.Nothing.

Phil:

Oh.Theresheisrightnow."howaboutwemeetatLeReveat7:

30?

"

Claire:

Well,thatsoundsinnocentenough.Imean,drinkswithanex-girlfriendatanintimateFrenchrestaurant.

Phil:

Honey,you'redoingthatthingwhereyousaywhatIwantyoutosaybutyourtoneseemsmean.

Claire:

Letmeguess...Deniseisn'tmarried.

Phil:

Recentlydivorced.What'sthebigdeal?

Claire:

Comeon,Phil.Youcan'tbethatnaive.Seriously,womenintheir30sontheinternetarelike...They'relikeninjas.Theygetintheirlittleblackoutfitsandtryandsneaktheirwayintoyourmarriage.

Phil:

That'snotDenise.

Claire:

Mm.

Phil:

Here,readsomeofhermessages.You'regonnafeelsilly.Goahead.

Claire:

"hey,Phil.How'sitgoin'?

"

Phil:

Youcan'taddthesexyvoice."hi,Phil.How'sitgoing?

"

Claire:

"sogladtohearyourneckisbetter"

Phil:

Areyouseriouslyjealous?

Claire:

No!

Iamnotjealousatall.Ijusthappentoknowwomenbetterthanyoudo,andthatwomanwantsaslice.

Phil:

Okay,justtoprovehowwrongyouare,I'mgonnainviteheroverherefordrinks.

Claire:

Finewithme.Justhopeit'sfinewithDenise."gee,Phil.IreallyhadmyheartsetonLeReve."

Phil:

Thatvoicedoesn'tbotherme.Kindoflikeit!

Cameron:

Well,hashebeenactingweirdaroundyou?

Mitchell:

No,no.I'vebeenavoidinghimallmorning.

Cameron:

Soyoudon'tevenknowifheheardyou.

Mitchell:

Well,that'swhywe'redoingthis.Hey,whereareyou?

Ionlyhaveahalf-hourforlunch.

Cameron:

Hello,handsome.

Mitchell:

Okay,so,uh,thisiswhereithappened.Just,um,turnoffthephone,rolldownthewindow,andwe'll…we'llseeifyoucanhearme.Okay.

Cameron:

Goaround!

We'rere-creatingafauxpas!

Thankyou!

Mitchell:

Okay.C-canyouhearmenow?

Cameron:

Uh,yeah,butjustbarely.Isthishowloudyouweretalking?

Mitchell:

Uh,well,itmighthavebeenalittlebitlouder.Therewastraffic.Imean,Ialmosthadtoshout.

Cameron:

Youalmosthadtowhat?

Mitchell:

Shout.

Cameron:

Littlebitloudernow.

Mitchell:

Shout!

Cameron:

Littlebitloudernow.

Mitchell:

Shout!

!

Cameron:

*hey,hey,hey,hey*

Mitchell:

Really,Cam?

Myjobisatstakehereand…Oh,w-whoarewekidding?

Youcanobviouslyhearme.Iamsoscrewed.

Jay:

Manny?

Manny,comehereasecond,pal.

Manny:

Huh?

Jay:

Igotsomebadnews,buddy.

Manny:

Whatisit?

Jay:

Well,there'snoeasywaytosaythis.ShelTurtlesteinisdead.

Manny:

What?

How?

!

Jay:

Iwasdownherereadingthepaper,AndIheardthiscommotionupinyourroom,so...SonaturallyIgorunningupthere.Andthismangyraccoonhadbustedthroughyourscreen.HemusthavescampereduptowhereShelwas.BythetimeIwalkedin,hehadhim...Thelittlebastardhadhimbytheneck,shakinghim.Gravel'sflyingeverywhere.Hedidn'tevenflinch.Hejuststaredatmewiththatsmuglookandthenbolted.IfonlyI'dhavegothereearlier.

Manny:

MayIseethebody?

Gloria:

Baby,areyousurethat'sagoodidea?

Manny:

It'ssomethingIhavetodo.That'shim.

Jay:

Sorry,pal.

Manny:

Itjustdoesn'tmakeanysense.

Jay:

Yep.Onlythegooddieyoung.

Manny:

Butinschoolweleadraccoonsarenocturnal.Theysleepduringtheday.

Jay:

Theysuredo,andthisonemust'vegotupforamidnightsnack.Youknow,we'vealldonethat.

Manny:

Iguessso.Yeah.

Jay:

Italladdsup.

Manny:

Idon'tthinkIcanbeinhererightnow.Toomanymemories.

Jay:

He'llbeokay.

Gloria:

Youlie.

Jay:

What?

Gloria:

I'mColombian.IknowafakecrimescenewhenIseeone!

Jay:

Iwashangingupthenewposter.Anditfellontopofhim.Itwasanaccident.

Gloria:

Youhavetotellhim.

Jay:

No.I'vebeenthroughthisbefore.WhenMitchellwas9,Iwassupposedtotakecareofhisbird.Itgotoutandflewintoafan.Itwaslikeabloodypillowfight.

Gloria:

Mygod.Howmanypetshaveyoukilled?

Jay:

Justthetwo.Itooktheheatonthebird. Itwasabigmistake.Tothisday,Mitchelllooksatme,Iseehimthinking,"that'stheguywhokilledFly-ZaMinnelli."

Gloria:

Andwhatifhefindsout?

Thenwhat?

You'llbetheguythatkilledhispetandliedtohim.

Jay:

He'snotgonnafindout,becauseIcoveredmytracks.

Gloria:

Okay.Fly-zaMinnelli?

Jay:

HowdidInotknowthatkidwasgay?

Alex:

Hey,Luke!

Bigdayforyou,huh?

Luke:

Why?

Alex:

Becauseyougettomeetyourrealmom.

Luke:

What?

Alex:

Weallmadeapactwe'ddenyituntilyouturned21,Butthat'stherealreasondad'soldgirlfriendiscomingover.She'syourmom,andifshelikesyou,you'llgolivewithher.

Luke:

I'mnotadopted.I'maskingmom.

Alex:

YoumeanMrs.Dunphy?

She'snotgoingtotellyouthetruth.

Luke:

I-I-I'mnot...

Alex:

Iknow.

Luke:

Unh!

Haley:

Just'causehecalledyouadork-to-dorksalesman?

Alex:

Theempirestrikesback.

Manny:

Raccoonshavefivetoes.

Jay:

What'sthat?

Manny:

Idon'tmeantobotheryou.It'sjustconfusing.Thefootprintsinmyroomonlyhavefourtoes.

Jay:

Youknow,IbetIknowwthappened.I'llbethelostthosetoesinafight.Andthatguylookedlikehe'dbeeninabrawlortwo.

Manny:

Onetoefromeachfoot?

Jay:

Maybe.Y-youknow,Manny,Ithinktheonlythingthat'sgonnagetyoutostopaskingallthesequestions.isforyoutohavealittleclosure.

Manny:

Whatdoyoumean?

Jay:

Well,I'dliketothrowalittlememorialforShel.It'llbegoodforallofus.Thatway,wegetourgriefout,andthenweneverhavetotalkaboutthisever...everagain.

Phil:

Hi!

Oh,careful,there'sathing.Ooh.That'sa...goodtoseeyou.

Den