老友记5.docx

老友记5.docx

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老友记5

六行人10-13TheOneWhereJoeySpeaksFrench 

[Scene:

CentralPerk.Everyone'ssittingonthecouchandPhoebeenters.] 

Phoebe:

Hi 

All:

Hey!

Hi!

Rachel:

Howwasthehoneymoon?

Phoebe;Oh,incredible!

Oh!

Champagne,candle-litdinners,moonlightwalksonthebeach,itwassoooro-man-tic!

Rachel:

Oh!

Chandler:

So,where'sMike?

Phoebe:

Oh,he'satthedoctor,hedidn'tpoopthewholetimewewerethere!

Joey:

Wellanyway,I'mgladyou'reback,Ireallyneedyourhelp. 

Phoebe:

Oh,why?

What'sup?

Joey:

IhaveanauditionforthisplayandforsomeofitIhavetospeakFrench.Which,accordingtomyrésumé,I'mfluentin. 

Ross:

Joey,youshouldn'tlieonyourrésumé. 

Monica:

Yeah,youreallyshouldn't.（toRoss,sarcastically）Bytheway,howwasthatyear-longdiginCairo?

Ross:

（whispering）Itwasok... 

Rachel:

IdidnotknowyouspokeFrench. 

Phoebe:

Oui,biensurjeparleFran?

ais!

Qu'est-cequetupensesalors?

Rachel:

Oh...you'resosexy!

Joey:

Well,so,willyouhelpme?

Ireallywannabeinthisplay. 

Phoebe:

Sure!

Toutleplaisirestpourmoi,monami. 

Rachel:

Seriouslystopit,orI'mgonnajumponya. 

OPENINGCREDITS 

[Scene:

MonicaandChandler'sapartment.] 

Chandler:

Hey. 

Monica:

Hey. 

Chandler:

Whyareyouwearingmyapron?

Monica:

I'mmakingcookiesforErica.Andoh,bytheway,wehavetoleavefortheairportsoon,herplanecomesinaboutanhour. 

Chandler:

Oh,hey,whenshegetshere,isitokifIintroduceyoutwoas"mywife"and"thewomanwho'scarryingmychild"?

（she'snotamused）No?

Divorce?

Ross:

（heenters）Hey. 

Monica:

Hey. 

Ross:

YouguysknowwhereRachelis?

Monica:

No,wehaven'tseenhersincethismorning. 

Ross:

Sounbelievable.ShewassupposedtomeetmehalfanhouragowithEmma.（hetriestotakeacookiebutMonicaslapshishand） 

Monica:

Hey!

Ross:

Hey!

Monica:

TheseareforErica!

Ross:

What?

She'sgonnaeatallthosecookies?

Monica:

Well,Iwanthebabytocomeoutallcuteandfat!

Ross:

So,whyisEricacomingtovisit?

Monica:

Well,becausewewanttogettoknowherbetterandshe'sneverbeentoNewYorksoshewantstoseeallthetourists'spots...youknow,StatueofLiberty,EmpireStateBuilding... 

Chandler:

Oh,thoseplaces!

There'salwayssomanypeople,they'rebeingcorralledlikecattle,and...youknow,there'salwayssomeidiotwhogoes"Mooooo"!

Monica:

Well,ifitannoysyousomuch,thenwhydoyoudoit?

Ross:

（lookingatRachelenteringwithEmma）Oh,hi!

Hi!

Thanksforshowingyouupthirtyminuteslate!

Rachel:

Ross... 

Ross:

No,no,no,I'msureyouhaveagreatexcuse,wh-wasitahairappointment,amani-pediorwasthereasaleatBarney's?

Rachel:

Myfatherhadanheartattack...（crying）...whileIwasatBarney’s. 

Ross:

OhmyGod. 

Monica:

Honey. 

Chandler:

I'msosorry... 

Ross:

Is-isheok?

Rachel:

Yeah,theysaidhe'sgonnabefine,buthe'sstillheavilysedated. 

Ross:

Ok,ok.I'mgonnacomeouttoLongIslandwithyou,Imean,youcan'tbealonerightnow. 

Rachel:

No,comeon,I'mtotallyok.（hugginghim）Idon'tneedyoutocome!

Icantotallyhandlethisonmyown. 

Ross:

Still-still,letmecome...forme. 

Rachel:

Ok.Ifyoureallyneedto. 

Ross:

IbetsomeonecoulduseoneofMonica'sfreshlybakedcookies. 

Rachel:

Oh,Ireallycould. 

Ross:

Oh!

Rachel:

Ohh...（RossmouthsHA-HAatMonicaandtakestwocookiesandshelooksathimangrily） 

[Scene:

CentralPerk.Phoebe'stryingtoteachJoeyFrench,soshe'ssittinginfrontofhimwiththescriptinherhands.] 

Phoebe:

Allright,itseemsprettysimple.Yourfirstlineis"MynameisClaude",so,justrepeatafterme."Jem'appelleClaude". 

Joey:

JedecoupClow. 

Phoebe:

Well,just...let'stryitagain. 

Joey:

Ok. 

Phoebe:

Jem'appelleClaude. 

Joey:

Jedeplimblue. 

Phoebe:

Uh.It'snot...quitewhatI'msaying. 

Joey:

Really?

Itsoundsexactlythesametome. 

Phoebe:

Itdoes,really?

Joey:

Yeah. 

Phoebe:

Allright,letjusttryitagain.Reallylisten. 

Joey:

Gotit. 

Phoebe:

（slowly）Jem'appelleClaude. 

Joey:

JeteflouppeFli. 

Phoebe:

Oh,monDieu!

Joey:

Oh,defuff!

Monica:

（enteringwithEricaandChandler）Heyyouguys. 

Phoebe:

Hi!

Joey:

Hey. 

Monica:

Iwantyoutomeetsomeonereallyspecial.Phoebe,thisisErica.Andthisisthebaby!

Phoebe:

Oh!

Monica:

Joey.Erica,baby!

Joey:

Hi. 

Monica:

Everyone.Erica,baby!

Chandler:

Monica.Calm,self. 

Erica:

Thankyou.It'sreallynicetomeetyouguys,Ican'tbelieveI'mhere!

Joey:

WelcometoNewYorkCity!

OrshouldIsay"ghedeuflooffNewYorkCity"?

Chandler:

Whywouldyousaythat?

Phoebe:

Ok.Whatareyougonnabedoingtoday?

Erica:

Iwannaseeeverything!

TimesSquare,ConeyIsland,RockefellerCenter... 

Joey:

Oh,youknowwhatyoushoulddo?

YoushouldwalkallthewayatthetopofStatueofLiberty. 

Erica:

Ohyeah,let'sdothat!

Chandler:

Great!

（toMonica）Thisbaby'dbetterbereallygood. 

[Scene:

Hospital.] 

Rachel:

（stoppinganursewho'scomingoutofaroom）Oh,uhm,excuseme,I'mheretoseemyfather.MynameisRachelGreen. 

Ross:

AndI'mDoctorRossGeller. 

Rachel:

Ross,please,thisisahospital,ok?

Thatactuallymeanssomethinghere. 

Rachel:

Cansomebodypleasegoin?

Nurse:

Absolutely. 

Ross:

Rach,IthinkI'mgonnawaitouthere,becausemythroatisfeelingalittlescratchy,Idon'twanttoinfecthim. 

Rachel:

Ross,please,don'tbesoscaredofhim!

Ross:

I'mnotscaredofhim,I'mreallysick!

Nurse:

He'sundersedation,sohe'sprettymuchout. 

Ross:

I'mfeelingbetter. 

Rachel:

Oh!

（Theyenter.Rachelseeshisfather,lyingonabed,withtubes,dripandeverything）Oh!

OhmyGod!

Ohhh,ohhh,wow,thatearandnosehairtrimmerIgothimwasjustmoneydownthedrain,huh?

Nurse:

MissGreen,yourfather'sdoctorisonthephoneifyou'dliketospeaktohim. 

Rachel:

Oh,great,Areyougonnabeok?

Ross:

He'sunconscious,Ithinkwe'llbejustfine!

Rachel（leaving）:

Ok. 

（RossgoesintotheroomwhereDr.Greenislayingunconscious.HeturnsontheTV,putshisfeetonthebedandstartswatchingadinosaurmoviewherethedinosauriscaughtbytwocowboys.Dr.Gellerawakes.） 

Ross:

DidtheTVwakeyou?

Dr.Green:

No,whenyouputyourfeetupinmybed,youtuggedonmycatheter. 

Ross:

Ouchy. 

Dr.Green:

Whatareyoudoinghere,Geller?

Ross:

Well,IcamewithRachel,whoshouldbebackanysecond!

（pause）Sowhat'snew?

Dr.Green:

Ooh,Ihavealittleheartattack. 

Ross:

Right,isitpainful?

Dr.Green:

What,theheartattackorsittingheretalkingtoyou?

Ross（hebuzzesforthenurse）Let'sseeifwecangetthatRachelbackhere. 

Dr.Green:

Sowhat'snewwithyou,uh,knockedupanymoreofmydaughterslately?

Ross:

Nope,justtheone.RACH!

[Scene:

Joey'sapartment.PhoebeistryingtoteachJoeyFrench.] 

Phoebe:

Jem'appelleClaude. 

Joey:

Jedocallblue!

Phoebe:

Noooo!

Ok,maybeifwejustbreakitdown.Ok,let'stryatonesyllableatatime.Ok?

Sorepeatafterme."je". 

Joey:

je. 

Phoebe:

m'ap 

Joey:

mah 

Phoebe:

pelle 

Joey:

pel. 

Phoebe:

Great,okfaster!

"je" 

Joey:

je. 

Phoebe:

m'ap 

Joey:

mah 

Phoebe:

pelle 

Joey:

pel. 

Phoebe:

Jem'appelle!

Joey:

Mepoohpooh!

Phoebe:

Ok,it'stoohard,Ican'tteachyou!

Joey:

Whatareyoudoing?

Phoebe:

I,IhavetogobeforeIputyourheadthroughawall.（sheleaves） 

Joey:

（hegoesoutcallingher）Don'tmove!

Don'tgo!

Ineedyou!

Myauditionistomorrow!

Shahblueblah!

Melahpeeh!

Ombrah!

（hegivesup）.Pooh. 

[Scene:

Green'smansion.Rachel'sRoom.Rachel'siscombingherhair;Ross'scomingintotheroom] 

Ross:

Hey!

Rachel:

Hi!

Ross:

Iw!

sgonnamakeussomedinnerbutallIfoundinyourdad'sfridgewasbaconandheavycream.（pause）Ithinkwesolvedthemysteryoftheheartattack. 

Rachel:

Uh.（pause）Didyoucallyourparents?

Ross:

Oh,yeah.Emma'sdoinggreat. 

Rachel:

Ohgood. 

Ross:

Wow. 

Rachel:

What?

Ross:

Justcan'tbelieveI'minRachelGreen'sroom. 

Rachel:

Whatdoyoumean?

You'vebeeninmyroombefore!

Ross:

Yeah,sure,right!

LikeI'veeverbeeninRachelGreen'sroom. 

Rachel:

OkIgottatellya,it'sreallyweirdwhenyouusemywholename. 

Ross:

Sorry.（Rachelsitsonherbed）.Youok?

Rachel:

Yeah. 

Ross:

Youhadaroughday,uh?

Rachel:

Yeah,justsoweirdseeinghimlikethat,youknow?

Imeanheisadoctor,youdon'texpectdoctorstogetsick!

Ross:

Butwedo!

（pause）It'sgonnabeok,Rach!

Rachel:

（she'ssad）Ow.Idon'twanthimtowakeupalone!

Ishouldgotothehospital!

Ross:

What?

No,no!

Hey,hey,heylook... 

Rachel:

What?

Ross:

Theygavehimalotofmedication,ok?

Hewouldn'tevenknowifyouwerethere.Look,we'llgoseehimfirstthinginthemorning,ok?

Rachel:

Really,Ishouldn'tfeelguilty?

Ross:

No,God!

Hey,Rach,you'vebeenanamazingdaughter,ok?

Rightnowyoujustneedtogetsomerest. 

Rachel:

Ok,maybeyou'reright. 

Ross:

（hekissesheronherforehead）Goodnight. 

Rachel:

Wait,wait,wait,wait.Wouldyoustayherewithmeforalittlewhile?

Ross:

Sure!

Rachel:

Ok.（ShesitsonthebedandRosssitsnearher）<+i>Thankyouforcomingwithmetoday. 

Ross:

Oh,ofcourse... 

Rachel:

RachelGreenisveryhappyyou'reinherroom!

Ross:

Metoo.Comehere.（Theyhug） 

Rachel:

Ijustdon'twanttobealonetonight. 

Ross:

Ok,well,uh,Icanmaybegrabasleepingbag,or...（There'soneofthosemoments.They'restaringateachother,noworduttered,andthensheleanstowardhiminordertokisshim,butheducksandavoidshermorethanonce.）Oh,oh.（hethenhugsherandwhenshetriestokisshimagain,hestandsupandshefallsdownonthebed）.No,Rach!

I'msorry,Ijustdon'tthinkthis,this,thisisagoodidea. 

Rachel:

Wait,wewon'tknowthat