英语话剧之泰坦尼克号Titanic后现代搞笑版.doc
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旁白:
It’sacoldevening.TheTitanichassunken.Rose,JackandOscarareonthelifeboatfloatingintheocean.ThisisJack.ThisisRoseandthisisOscar,herhusband-to-be.(边说边介绍,三人坐在课桌上)
Oscar:
Oh,honey~AreyouOK?
(边说边将手搭上Rose肩)
Jack:
Sheismygirl.(打开Oscar的手)
Oscar:
Youaresocold.(脱下报纸披在R身上面向观众)whatyouwear,whatyouare.
Jack:
Whatareyoudoing!
(扔掉校服,脱下自己的羽绒服抖了抖,面向观众)BoSideng(波斯登),warmandcomfortable,it’smychoice.(将羽绒服披在Rose身上)
Rose:
(向Jack)Iloveyou.(向观众)ButIloveBoSidengmore.
Oscar:
Hey!
Sheismywife-to-be,whoareyou?
Jack:
IamI.Wodedipanwozuozhu(我的地盘我做主).
Oscar:
PeopleontheEarthallknow,She,andI,willgotoNewYorktohaveourwedding.Rose:
Butnow……
Jack:
Don’tsayanymore!
Takeyourknifeout!
(从口袋里掏出铅笔,紧握手中)
Oscar:
Ok.Let’sgofighting!
(同样掏出铅笔紧握手中)
Jack&Oscar:
Fighting!
(用铅笔互戳)----小蜜蜂~
Rose:
No,no,no!
Pleasestop!
(拉二人)(J&O不小心将Rose推下桌子——落水)
Rose:
Help,help!
(Jack&Oscar将拉上Rose桌子)
Oscar:
Honey,howareyou?
Rose:
(向观众)PiaoRou(飘柔),justsoconfident~(甩头发)
(Rose不小心推Oscar,Oscar落水)Oscar:
Help,help!
Rose:
Oh,no!
(向Oscar伸手)(Jack抓过Rose的手,对视)
Jack:
(唱)你是我的玫瑰,你是我的花…Youaremylife,youaremyhoney~
Rose:
But……whataboutOscar?
Jack:
Don’tpayattentiontohim.
Rose:
OK.Darling~Iloveyou,lovingyou,likemouseloverice~
旁白:
Atthistime,Oscarhasbeenfaraway……JackandRosearestillfloatingintheocean.It’scolderandcolder.
Jack:
Doyoufeelcold?
Rose:
Yes.Youseewearesolonely.
Jack:
Don’tworry.Ihavethis!
(从口袋里掏出打火机,并向观众展示)ThisisamagicDaHuoji(打火机).(Jack按下打火机)(Superwoman上,胸前贴一张纸,上书S)
Superwoman:
(向观众)DoyouknowwhoamI?
IamSuperwoman!
ThefamousSupermanismybrother.I’mwillingtohelpothers.
Rose:
Wouldyoupleasehelpusgetawayfromhere?
(Superwoman无视,面向Jack)
Superwoman:
Oh,prettyboy~Comehere,Iwillsaveyou.
Jack:
Takemygirltogether.
Superwoman:
Noway!
(Superwoman下)(Jack第二次按下打火机)
(IndianPrincess上,向观众合掌问候)
Princess:
IamaprincessfromIndia.
Rose:
Wouldyoupleasehelpusgetawayfromhere?
Princess:
OK.Ihaveamagicblanket,maybeitcantakeyouaway.Comeon.(从口袋里掏出围巾)(Jack&Rose尝试伸出脚,Princess上下晃动围巾)
Princess:
Oh,no,it’sbroken!
Myblanket!
(边说边后退,渐远)
(IndianPrincess下)(Jack第三次还没按,HarryPotter上,提着扫帚)
Harry:
Yi?
WhereamI?
(向观众)MynameisHarryPotter.I’mfromHogwarts(霍格沃茨).Ilosemyway.
Rose:
Wouldyoupleasehelpusgetawayfromhere?
Harry:
Ireallywanttohelpyou,butmyabilityislimited.(耸肩)
Jack:
(愤怒地)Oh,mygod!
Goawayatonce!
(指向前方)(HarryPotter下)
旁白:
Suddenly,thelifeboatisshakingbecauseJackandRosearetooheavy.
Jack:
Rose,listentome.Iloveyou,butIwillleaveyou.Theboatcan’tsupportusfor
alongtime.Youmustlive,soIwilljumpintothesea.
Rose:
No,no,no.Jumpornotjump,thisisaquestion.
Jack:
ThenlettheGoddecideit(二人低头虔诚祈祷状)
Rose:
Godwillblessus.(Jack和Rose同时从身后伸出手来,包剪锤)
Jack&Rose:
Onetwothree!
(Jack出锤子,Rose出包子)
Jack:
Ilose.Yousee,it’sGod’schoice.(Rose连连摇头)
Rose:
Oh,no.Jack,Jack,whyyournameisJack!
Jack:
Iwishyouahappylife.Good-bye!
(Jack跳下桌子,Rose伸手拉,未果)
Rose:
Youjump,Ijump.(Rose跳下桌子,O未死,继续叫救命……)
(旁白唱myheartwillgoon,音乐起,全剧终。
Jack&Rose跳舞,张开手臂经典动作作结。
).