The golden honeymoon 金蜜月.docx

The golden honeymoon 金蜜月.docx

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Thegoldenhoneymoon金蜜月

Thegoldenhoneymoon

MOTHERsaysthatwhenIstarttalkingIneverknowwhentostop.ButItellhertheonlytimeIgetachanceiswhensheain'taround，soIhavetomakethemostofit.IguessthefactisneitheroneofuswouldbewelcomeinaQuakermeeting，butasItellMother，whatdidGodgiveustonguesforifHedidn'twantweshouldusethem？

OnlyshesaysHedidn'tgivethemtoustosaythesamethingoverandoveragain，likeIdo，andrepeatmyself.ButIsay：

　　“Well，Mother，”Isay，“whenpeopleislikeyouandIandbeenmarriedfiftyyears，doyouexpecteverythingIsaywillbesomethingyouain'theardmesaybefore？

Butitmaybenewtoothers，astheyain'tnobodyelselivedwithmeaslongasyouhave.”

　　Soshesays：

　　“Youcanbettheyain't，astheycouldn'tnobodyelsestandyouthatlong.”

　　“Well，”Itellher，“youlookprettyhealthy.”

　　“MaybeIdo，”shewillsay，“butIlookedevenhealthierbeforeImarriedyou.”

　　Youcan'tgetaheadofMother.

　　Yes，sir，wewasmarriedjustfiftyyearsagotheseventeenthdayoflastDecemberandmydaughterandson-in-lawwasoverfromTrentontohelpuscelebratetheGoldenWedding.Myson-in-lawisJohnH.Kramer，therealestateman.Hemade$12，000oneyearandisprettywellthoughtofaroundTrenton；agood，steady，hardworker.TheRotarianswasafterhimalongtimetojoin，buthekepttellingthemhishomewashisclub.ButEdiefnallymadehimjoin.That'smydaughter.

　　Well，anyway，theycomeovertohelpuscelebratetheGoldenWeddinganditwasprettycrimpyweatherandthefurnacedon'tseemtoheatupnomorelikeitusedtoandMothermadetheremarkthatshehopedthiswinterwouldn'tbeascoldasthelast，referringtothewinterprevious.SoEdiesaidifshewasus，andnothingtokeepushome，shecertainlywouldn'tspendnomorewintersuphereandwhydidn'twejustshutoffthewaterandcloseupthehouseandgodowntoTampa，Florida？

Youknowwewastherefourwintersagoandstaidfiveweeks，butitcostusoverthreehundredandfiftydollarsforhotelbillalone.SoMothersaidwewasn'tgoingnoplacetoberobbed.Somyson-in-lawspokeupandsaidthatTampawasn'ttheonlyplaceintheSouth，andbesideswedidn'thavetostopatnohighpricehotelbutcouldrentusacoupleroomsandboardoutsomewheres，andhehadheardthatSt.Petersburg，Florida，wasthespotandifwesaidthewordhewouldwritedownthereandmakeinquiries.

　　Well，tomakealongstoryshort，wedecidedtodoitandEdiesaiditwouldbeourGoldenHoneymoonandforapresentmyson-in-lawpaidthedifferencebetweenasectionandacompartmentsoaswecouldhaveacompartmentandhavemoreprivatecy.Inacompartmentyouhaveanupperandlowerberthjustliketheregularsleeper，butitisashutinroombyitselfandgotawashbowl.Thecarwewentinwasallcompartmentsandnoregularberthsatall.Itwasallcompartments.

　　WewenttoTrentonthenightbeforeandstaidatmydaughterandson-in-lawandweleftTrentonthenextafternoonat3.23P.M.

　　ThiswasthetwelfthdayofJanuary.Mothersetfacingthefrontofthetrain，asitmakeshergiddytoridebackwards.Isetfacingher，whichdoesnotaffectme.WereachedNorthPhiladelphiaat4.03P.M.andwereachedWestPhiladelphiaat4.14，butdidnotgointoBroadStreet.WereachedBaltimoreat6.30andWashington，D.C.，at7.25.OurtrainlaidoverinWashingtontwohourstillanothertraincomealongtopickusupandIgotoutandstrolleduptheplatformandintotheUnionStation.WhenIcomeback，ourcarhadbeenswitchedontoanothertrack，butIrememberedthenameofit，theLaBelle，asIhadoncevisitedmyauntoutinOconomowoc，Wisconsin，wheretherewasalakeofthatname，soIhadnodifficultyingettinglocated.ButMotherhadnearlyfrettedherselfsickforfearIwouldbeleft.

　　“Well，”Isaid，“Iwouldoffollowedyouonthenexttrain.”

　　“Youcouldof，”saidMother，andshepointedoutthatshehadthemoney.

　　“Well，”Isaid，“weareinWashingtonandIcouldofborrowedfromtheUnitedStatesTreasury.IwouldofpretendedIwasanEnglishman.”

　　Mothercaughtthepointandlaughedheartily.

　　OurtrainpulledoutofWashingtonat9.40P.M.andMotherandIturnedinearly，Itakingtheupper.DuringthenightwepassedthroughthegreenfieldsofoldVirginia，thoughitwastoodarktotelliftheywasgreenorwhatcolor.Whenwegotupinthemorning，wewasatFayetteville，NorthCarolina.WehadbreakfastinthediningcarandafterbreakfastIgotinconversationwiththemaninthenextcompartmenttoours.HewasfromLebanon，NewHampshire，andamanabouteightyyearsofage.Hiswifewaswithhim，andtwounmarrieddaughtersandImadetheremarkthatIshouldthinkthefourofthemwouldbecrowdedinonecompartment，buthesaidtheyhadmadethetripeverywinterforfifteenyearsandknowedhowtokeepoutofeachother'sway.HesaidtheywasboundforTarponSprings.

　　WereachedCharleston，SouthCarolina，at12.50P.M.andarrivedatSavannah，Georgia，at4.20.WereachedJacksonville，Florida，at8.45P.M.andhadanhourandaquartertolayoverthere，butMothermadeafussaboutmegettingoffthetrain，sowehadthedarkymakeupourberthsandretiredbeforeweleftJacksonville.Ididn'tsleepgoodasthetraindonealotofhemmingandhawing，andMotherneversleepsgoodonatrainasshesayssheisalwaysworryingthatIwillfallout.Shesaysshewouldratherhavetheupperherself，asthenshewouldnothavetoworryaboutme，butItellherIcan'ttaketheriskofhavingitgetoutthatIallowedmywifetosleepinanupperberth.Itwouldmaketalk.

　　WewasupinthemorningintimetoseeourfriendsfromNewHampshiregetoffatTarponSprings，whichwereachedat6.53A.M.

　　SeveralofourfellowpassengersgotoffatClearwaterandsomeatBelleair，wherethetrainbacksrightuptothedoorofthemammothhotel.Belleairisthewinterheadquartersforthegolfdudesandeverybodythatgotofftherehadtheirbagofsticks，asmanyastenandtwelveinabag.Womenandall.WhenIwasayoungmanwecalleditshinnyandonlyneededoneclubtoplaywithandaboutonegameofitwouldofbeena-plentyforsomeofthesedudes，thewayweplayedit.

　　ThetrainpulledintoSt.Petersburgat8.20andwhenwegotoffthetrainyouwouldthinktheywasariot，whatwithallthedarkiesbarkingforthedifferenthotels.

　　IsaidtoMother，Isaid：

　　“Itisagoodthingwehavegotaplacepickedouttogotoanddon'thavetochooseahotel，asitwouldbehardtochooseamongstthemifeveryoneofthemisthebest.”

　　Shelaughed.

　　WefoundajitneyandIgivehimtheaddressoftheroommyson-in-lawhadgotforusandsoonwewasthereandintroducedourselvestotheladythatownsthehouse，ayoungwidowaboutforty-eightyearsofage.Sheshowedusourroom，whichwaslightandairywithacomfortablebedandbureauandwashstand.Itwastwelvedollarsaweek，butthelocationwasgood，onlythreeblocksfromWilliamsPark.

　　St.Peteiswhatfolkscallsthetown，thoughtheyalsocallittheSunshineCity，astheyclaimthey'snootherplaceinthecountrywherethey'sfewerdayswhenOldSoldon'tsmiledownonMotherEarth，andoneofthenewspapersgivesawayalltheircopiesfreeeverydaywhenthesundon'tshine.Theyclaimtoofonlygivethemawaysomesixty-oddtimesinthelastelevenyears.Anothernicknametheyhavegotforthetownis“thePoorMan'sPalmBeach，”butIguessthey'smenthatcomestherethatcouldborrowasmuchfromthebankassomeoftheWillieboysovertotheotherPalmBeach.

　　DuringourstaywepaidavisittotheLewisTentCity，whichistheheadquartersfortheTinCanTourists.Butmaybeyouain'theardaboutthem.Well，theyareanorganizationthattakestheirvacationtripsbyautoandcarrieseverythingwiththem.Thatis，theybringalongtheirtentstosleepinandcookinandtheydon'tpatronizenohotelsorcafeterias，buttheyhavegottobebonafideautocampersortheycan'tbelongtotheorganization.

　　Theytellmethey'sover200，000memberstoitandtheycallthemselvestheTinCannersonaccountofmostoftheirfoodbeingputupintincans.OnecoupleweseenintheTentCitywasacouplefromBrady，Texas，namedMr.andMrs.Pence，whichtheoldmanisovereightyyearsofageandtheyhadcomeintheirautoallthewayfromhome，adistanceof1，641miles.Theytookfiveweeksforthetrip，Mr.Pencedrivingtheentiredistance.

　　TheTinCannershailsfromeveryStateintheUnionandinthesummertimetheyvisitplaceslikeNewEnglandandtheGreatLakesregion，butinthewinterthemostofthemcomestoFloridaandscattersallovertheState.Whilewewasdownthere，theywasanationalconventionofthematGainesville，Florida，andtheyelectedaFredonia，NewYork，manastheirpresident.HistitleisRoyalTinCanOpeneroftheWorld.Theyhavegotasongwroteupwhicheverybodyhasgottolearnitbeforetheyareamember：

　　“Thetincanforever！

Hurrah，boys！

Hurrah！

　　Upwiththetincan！

Downwiththefoe！

　　Wewillrallyroundthecampfire，we'llrallyonceagain，Shouting，'Weautocampforever！

'“

　　Thatissomethinglikeit.Andthemembershasalsogottohaveatincanfastenedontothefrontoftheirmachine.

　　IaskedMotherhowshewouldliketotravelaroundthatwayandshesaid：

　　“Fine，butnotwithanoldrattlebrainlikeyoudriving.”

　　“Well，”Isaid，“IameightyearsyoungerthanthisMr.PencewhodroveherefromTexas.”

　　“Yes，”shesaid，“butheisoldenoughtonotbeskittish.”

　　Youcan'tgetaheadofMother.

　　Well，oneofthefirstthingswedoneinSt.PetersburgwastogototheChamberofCommerceandregister