Mammon and the Archer.docx

Mammon and the Archer.docx

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MammonandtheArcher

MammonandtheArcher

OldAnthonyRockwall,retiredmanufacturerandproprietorofRockwall'sEurekaSoap,lookedoutthelibrarywindowofhisFifthAvenuemansionandgrinned.Hisneighbourtotheright--thearistocraticclubman,G.VanSchuylightSuffolk-Jones--cameouttohiswaitingmotor-car,wrinklingacontumeliousnostril,asusual,attheItalianrenaissancesculptureofthesoappalace'sfrontelevation.

"Stuck-upoldstatuetteofnothingdoing!

"commentedtheex-SoapKing."TheEdenMusee'llgetthatoldfrozenNesselrodeyetifhedon'twatchout.I'llhavethishousepaintedred,white,andbluenextsummerandseeifthat'llmakehisDutchnoseturnupanyhigher."

AndthenAnthonyRockwall,whonevercaredforbells,wenttothedoorofhislibraryandshouted"Mike!

"inthesamevoicethathadoncechippedoffpiecesofthewelkinontheKansasprairies.

"Tellmyson,"saidAnthonytotheansweringmenial,"tocomeinherebeforeheleavesthehouse."

WhenyoungRockwallenteredthelibrarytheoldmanlaidasidehisnewspaper,lookedathimwithakindlygrimnessonhisbig,smooth,ruddycountenance,rumpledhismopofwhitehairwithonehandandrattledthekeysinhispocketwiththeother.

"Richard,"saidAnthonyRockwail,"whatdoyoupayforthesoapthatyouuse?

"

Richard,onlysixmonthshomefromcollege,wasstartledalittle.Hehadnotyettakenthemeasureofthissireofhis,whowasasfullofunexpectednessesasagirlatherfirstparty.

"Sixdollarsadozen,Ithink,dad."

"Andyourclothes?

"

"Isupposeaboutsixtydollars,asarule."

"You'reagentleman,"saidAnthony,decidedly."I'veheardoftheseyoungbloodsspending$24adozenforsoap,andgoingoverthehundredmarkforclothes.You'vegotasmuchmoneytowasteasanyof'em,andyetyousticktowhat'sdecentandmoderate.NowIusetheoldEureka--notonlyforsentiment,butit'sthepurestsoapmade.

Wheneveryoupaymorethan10centsacakeforsoapyoubuybadperfumesandlabels.But50centsisdoingverywellforayoungmaninyourgeneration,positionandcondition.AsIsaid,you'reagentleman.Theysayittakesthreegenerationstomakeone.They'reoff.Money'lldoitasslickassoapgrease.It'smadeyouone.Byhokey!

it'salmostmadeoneofme.I'mnearlyasimpoliteanddisagreeableandill-manneredasthesetwooldKnickerbockergentsoneachsideofmethatcan'tsleepofnightsbecauseIboughtinbetween'em."

"Therearesomethingsthatmoneycan'taccomplish,"remarkedyoungRockwall,rathergloomily.

"Now,don'tsaythat,"saidoldAnthony,shocked."Ibetmymoneyonmoneyeverytime.I'vebeenthroughtheencyclopaediadowntoYlookingforsomethingyoucan'tbuywithit;andIexpecttohavetotakeuptheappendixnextweek.I'mformoneyagainstthefield.Tellmesomethingmoneywon'tbuy."

"Foronething,"answeredRichard,ranklingalittle,"itwon'tbuyoneintotheexclusivecirclesofsociety.""Oho!

won'tit?

"thunderedthechampionoftherootofevil."YoutellmewhereyourexclusivecircleswouldbeifthefirstAstorhadn'thadthemoneytopayforhissteeragepassageover?

"

Richardsighed.

"Andthat'swhatIwascomingto,"saidtheoldman,lessboisterously."That'swhyIaskedyoutocomein.There'ssomethinggoingwrongwithyou,boy.I'vebeennoticingitfortwoweeks.Outwithit.IguessIcouldlaymyhandsonelevenmillionswithintwenty-fourhours,besidestherealestate.Ifit'syourliver,there'stheRamblerdowninthebay,coaled,andreadytosteamdowntotheBahamasintwodays."

"Notabadguess,dad;youhaven'tmisseditfar."

"Ah,"saidAnthony,keenly;"what'shername?

"

Richardbegantowalkupanddownthelibraryfloor.Therewasenoughcomradeshipandsympathyinthiscrudeoldfatherofhistodrawhisconfidence.

"Whydon'tyouaskher?

"demandedoldAnthony."She'lljumpatyou.You'vegotthemoneyandthelooks,andyou'readecentboy.Yourhandsareclean.You'vegotnoEurekasoapon'em.You'vebeentocollege,butshe'lloverlookthat."

"Ihaven'thadachance,"saidRichard.

"Makeone,"saidAnthony."Takeherforawalkinthepark,orastrawride,orwalkhomewithherfromchurchChance!

Pshaw!

"

"Youdon'tknowthesocialmill,dad.She'spartofthestreamthatturnsit.Everyhourandminuteofhertimeisarrangedfordaysinadvance.Imusthavethatgirl,dad,orthistownisablackjackswampforevermore.AndIcan'twriteit--Ican'tdothat."

"Tut!

"saidtheoldman."DoyoumeantotellmethatwithallthemoneyI'vegotyoucan'tgetanhourortwoofagirl'stimeforyourself?

"

"I'veputitofftoolate.She'sgoingtosailforEuropeatnoondayafterto-morrowforatwoyears'stay.I'mtoseeheraloneto-morroweveningforafewminutes.

She'satLarchmontnowatheraunt's.Ican'tgothere.ButI'mallowedtomeetherwithacabattheGrandCentralStationto-morroweveningatthe8.30train.WedrivedownBroadwaytoWallack'satagallop,wherehermotherandaboxpartywillbewaitingforusinthelobby.Doyouthinkshewouldlistentoadeclarationfrommeduringthatsixoreightminutesunderthosecircumstances?

No.AndwhatchancewouldIhaveinthetheatreorafterward?

None.No,dad,thisisonetanglethatyourmoneycan'tunravel.Wecan'tbuyoneminuteoftimewithcash;ifwecould,richpeoplewouldlivelonger.There'snohopeofgettingatalkwithMissLantrybeforeshesails."

"Allright,Richard,myboy,"saidoldAnthony,cheerfully."Youmayrunalongdowntoyourclubnow.I'mgladitain'tyourliver.Butdon'tforgettoburnafewpunksticksinthejosshousetothegreatgodMazumafromtimetotime.Yousaymoneywon'tbuytime?

Well,ofcourse,youcan'tordereternitywrappedupanddeliveredatyourresidenceforaprice,butI'veseenFatherTimegetprettybadstonebruisesonhisheelswhenhewalkedthroughthegolddiggings."

ThatnightcameAuntEllen,gentle,sentimental,wrinkled,sighing,oppressedbywealth,intoBrotherAnthonyathiseveningpaper,andbegandiscourseonthesubjectoflovers'woes.

"Hetoldmeallaboutit,"saidbrotherAnthony,yawning."Itoldhimmybankaccountwasathisservice.Andthenhebegantoknockmoney.Saidmoneycouldn'thelp.

Saidtherulesofsocietycouldn'tbebuckedforayardbyateamoften-millionaires."

"Oh,Anthony,"sighedAuntEllen,"Iwishyouwouldnotthinksomuchofmoney.Wealthisnothingwhereatrueaffectionisconcerned.Loveisall-powerful.Ifheonlyhadspokenearlier!

ShecouldnothaverefusedourRichard.ButnowIfearitistoolate.Hewillhavenoopportunitytoaddressher.Allyourgoldcannotbringhappinesstoyourson."

Ateighto'clockthenexteveningAuntEllentookaquaintoldgoldringfromamoth-eatencaseandgaveittoRichard.

"Wearitto-night,nephew,"shebegged."Yourmothergaveittome.Goodluckinloveshesaiditbrought.Sheaskedmetogiveittoyouwhenyouhadfoundtheoneyouloved."

YoungRockwalltooktheringreverentlyandtrieditonhissmallestfinger.Itslippedasfarasthesecondjointandstopped.Hetookitoffandstuffeditintohisvestpocket,afterthemannerofman.Andthenhe'phonedforhiscab.

AtthestationhecapturedMissLantryoutofthegaddingmobateightthirty-two.

"Wemustn'tkeepmammaandtheotherswaiting,"saidshe.

"ToWallack'sTheatreasfastasyoucandrive!

"saidRichardloyally.

TheywhirledupForty-secondtoBroadway,andthendownthewhite-starredlanethatleadsfromthesoftmeadowsofsunsettotherockyhillsofmorning.

AtThirty-fourthStreetyoungRichardquicklythrustupthetrapandorderedthecabmantostop.

"I'vedroppedaring,"heapologised,asheclimbedout."Itwasmymother's,andI'dhatetoloseit.Iwon'tdetainyouaminute--Isawwhereitfell."

Inlessthanaminutehewasbackinthecabwiththering.

Butwithinthatminuteacrosstowncarhadstoppeddirectlyinfrontofthecab.Thecabmantriedtopasstotheleft,butaheavyexpresswagoncuthimoff.Hetriedtheright,andhadtobackawayfromafurniturevanthathadnobusinesstobethere.Hetriedtobackout,butdroppedhisreinsandsworedutifully.Hewasblockadedinatangledmessofvehiclesandhorses.

Oneofthosestreetblockadeshadoccurredthatsometimestieupcommerceandmovementquitesuddenlyinthebigcity.

"Whydon'tyoudriveon?

"saidMissLantry,impatiently."We'llbelate."

Richardstoodupinthecabandlookedaround.Hesawacongestedfloodofwagons,trucks,cabs,vansandstreetcarsfillingthevastspacewhereBroadway,SixthAvenueandThirly-fourthstreetcrossoneanotherasatwenty-sixinchmaidenfillshertwenty-twoinchgirdle.Andstillfromallthecrossstreetstheywerehurryingandrattlingtowardtheconvergingpointatfullspeed,andhurlingthcmselvesintothestrugglingmass,lockingwheelsandaddingtheirdrivers'imprecationstotheclamour.TheentiretrafficofManhattanseemedtohavejammeditselfaroundthem.TheoldestNewYorkeramongthethousandsofspectatorsthatlinedthesidewalkshadnotwitnessedastreetblockadeoftheproportionsofthisone.

"I'mverysorry,"saidRichard,asheresumedhisseat,"butitlooksasifwearestuck.Theywon'tgetthisjumbleloosenedupinanhour.Itwasmyfault.IfIhadn'tdroppedtheringwe--"Letmeseethering,"saidMissLantry."Nowthatitcan'tbehelped,Idon'tcare.Ithinktheatresarestupid,anyway."

At11o'clockthatnightsomebodytappedlightlyonAnthonyRockwall'sdoor.

"Comein,"shoutedAnthony,whowasinareddressing-gown,readingabookofpiraticaladventures.

SomebodywasAuntEllen,lookinglikeagrey-hairedangelthathadbeenleftonearthbymistake.

"They'reengaged,Anthony,"shesaid,sof