Ted演讲稿脆弱的力量Word文档格式.docx

Ted演讲稿脆弱的力量Word文档格式.docx

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mgoingtocallyouaresearcher,Ithink,butI'

m

afraidifIcallyouaresearcher,noonewillcome,becausethey'

llthink

you'

reboringandirrelevant.（Laughter）AndIwaslike,Okay.Andshe

said,ButthethingIlikedaboutyourtalkisyou'

reastoryteller.SoI

thinkwhatI'

lldoisjustcallyouastoryteller.Andofcourse,the

academic,insecurepartofmewaslike,You'

regoingtocallmea

what?

Andshesaid,I'

mgoingtocallyouastoryteller.AndIwaslike,

Whynotmagicpixie?

（Laughter）Iwaslike,Letmethinkaboutthis

forasecond.Itriedtocalldeeponmycourage.AndIthought,you

know,Iamastoryteller.I'

maqualitativeresearcher.Icollectstories;

that'

swhatIdo.Andmaybestoriesarejustdatawithasoul.Andmaybe

I'

mjustastoryteller.AndsoIsaid,Youknowwhat?

Whydon'

tyoujust

sayI'

maresearcher-storyteller.Andshewent,Haha.There'

snosuch

thing.（Laughter）SoI'

maresearcher-storyteller,andI'

mgoingtotalkto

youtoday--we'

retalkingaboutexpandingperception--andsoIwantto

researchthat

myofpieceastoriesaboutsometellandyoutotalk

fundamentallyexpandedmyperceptionandreallyactuallychangedthe

waythatIliveandloveandworkandparent.

Andthisiswheremystorystarts.WhenIwasayoungresearcher,

doctoralstudent,myfirstyearIhadaresearchprofessorwhosaidto

us,Here'

sthething,ifyoucannotmeasureit,itdoesnotexist.AndI

thoughthewasjustsweet-talkingme.Iwaslike,Really?

andhewas

like,Absolutely.AndsoyouhavetounderstandthatIhaveabachelor'

s

insocialwork,amaster'

sinsocialwork,andIwasgettingmyPh.D.in

socialwork,somyentireacademiccareerwassurroundedbypeoplewho

kindofbelievedinthelife'

smessy,loveit.AndI'

mmoreofthe,life'

messy,cleanitup,organizeitandputitintoabento

box.（Laughter）AndsotothinkthatIhadfoundmyway,tofounda

careerthattakesme--really,oneofthebigsayingsinsocialworkis,

Leanintothediscomfortofthework.AndI'

mlike,knockdiscomfort

upsidetheheadandmoveitoverandgetallA'

s.Thatwasmymantra.So

Iwasveryexcitedaboutthis.AndsoIthought,youknowwhat,thisis

thecareerforme,becauseIaminterestedinsomemessytopics.ButI

wanttobeabletomakethemnotmessy.Iwanttounderstandthem.I

wanttohackintothesethingsIknowareimportantandlaythecodeout

foreveryonetosee.

SowhereIstartedwaswithconnection.Because,bythetimeyou'

rea

socialworkerfor10years,whatyourealizeisthatconnectioniswhy

we'

rehere.It'

swhatgivespurposeandmeaningtoourlives.Thisiswhat

it'

sallabout.Itdoesn'

tmatterwhetheryoutalktopeoplewhoworkin

socialjusticeandmentalhealthandabuseandneglect,whatweknowis

thatconnection,theabilitytofeelconnected,is--neurobiologicallythat'

howwe'

rewired--it'

swhywe'

rehere.SoIthought,youknowwhat,I'

goingtostartwithconnection.Well,youknowthatsituationwhereyou

getanevaluationfromyourboss,andshetellsyou37thingsyoudo

really

awesome,and

one

thing

--

an

opportunity

for

growth?

（Laughter）Andallyoucanthinkaboutisthatopportunityfor

growth,right?

Well,apparentlythisisthewaymyworkwentas

well,because,whenyouaskpeopleaboutlove,theytellyouabout

heartbreak.Whenyouaskpeopleaboutbelonging,they'

lltellyoutheir

mostexcruciatingexperiencesofbeingexcluded.Andwhenyouask

peopleaboutconnection,thestoriestheytoldmewereabout

disconnection.

Soveryquickly--reallyaboutsixweeksintothisresearch--Iraninto

thisunnamedthingthatabsolutelyunraveledconnectioninawaythatI

didn'

tunderstandorhadneverseen.AndsoIpulledbackoutofthe

researchandthought,Ineedtofigureoutwhatthisis.Anditturnedout

of

feartheunderstoodaseasilyreallyisshameshame.Andbeto

disconnection:

Istheresomethingaboutmethat,ifotherpeopleknowit

orseeit,thatIwon'

tbeworthyofconnection?

ThethingsIcantellyou

aboutit:

it'

suniversal;

weallhaveit.Theonlypeoplewhodon'

t

experienceshamehavenocapacityforhumanempathyorconnection.No

onewantstotalkaboutit,andthelessyoutalkaboutitthemoreyou

haveit.Whatunderpinnedthisshame,thisI'

mnotgoodenough,

--whichweallknowthatfeeling:

I'

mnotblankenough.I'

mnotthin

enough,richenough,beautifulenough,smartenough,promote