Friends剧本21.docx

Friends剧本21.docx

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Friends剧本21

TheOneWithRoss'NewGirlfriend

Writtenby:

JeffAstroff&MikeSikowitz

Transcribedby:

MindyMattinglyPhillips

WithMinorAdjustmentsby:

EricAasen

[Scene:

CentralPerk,Phoebeisrecappinglastseason,andasshetalksweseeamontagueofscenesfromRossandRachel.]

Phoebe:

Ok,sothisisprettymuchwhat'shappenedsofar.RosswasinlovewithRachelsince,youknow,forever,buteverytimehetriedtotellher,somethingkindofgotintheway,likecats,andItalianguys.FinallyChandlerwaslike"forgetabouther"butwhenRosswasinChinaonhisdig,ChandlerletitslipthatRosswasinlovewithRachel.Shewaslike,"Ohmygod."Soshewenttotheairporttomeethimwhenhecameback,butwhatshedidn'tknowwas,thatRosswasgettingofftheplanewithanotherwoman.Uh-Oh!

So,that'sprettymucheverythingyouneedtoknow.But,enoughaboutus.So,how'veyoubeen?

OpeningCredits

[Scene,TheAirport,continuedfromlastseason,RacheliswaitingforRosstocomeoftheplane,whensheseeshe'scomingoffwithanotherwoman.]

Rachel:

Ohmygod.Ohmygod.（Shedecidestomakeabreakforit.）Excuseme.Move!

Move!

Emergency!

Excuseme!

（Shetriesclimbingoverabenchandfallsdown.）

Ross:

（seeingher）Rach!

Rachel:

Oh,thereyouare!

Hi!

Oh,so,so,howwasChina,you?

（Hitshimwiththeflowers.）

Ross:

Itwas,itwasgreat.Oh,whathappened?

Rachel:

What?

Ross:

You'rebleeding.

Rachel:

Iam?

Oh,lookatthat,yesIam.Enoughaboutme,enoughaboutme,Mr.BackfromtheOrient.Comeon.Iwannaheareverything!

Everything.（LooksatJulie）

Ross:

Well,wheredoIstart?

ThisisJulie.Julie,thisisRachel.

Rachel:

Theseare,thesearen'tforyou.（toJulie）Theseareforyou.（Loudly,thinkingshecan'tspeakEnglish.）Welcometoourcountry.

Julie:

（Loudly,provingshecanspeakEnglish.）Thankyou.I'mfromNewYork.

Rachel:

Ok,well,notaproblem.We'lljustusethemtostopthebleeding.Ok.Baggageclaim?

Ok.

[Scene:

MonicaandRachel's,thegangiswaitingforRacheltoreturnfromtheairportwithRoss.]

Chandler:

 Noway!

Monica:

I'mtellingyou,shewenttotheairport,andshe'sgonnagoforitwithRoss!

Phoebe:

Ohmygod.Thisishuge.Thisisbiggerthanhuge.Thisislike,allright,what'sbiggerthanhuge?

Joey:

Um,this?

Phoebe:

Yes.

Monica:

Guys,yougotyourhaircut.

Chandler:

Yes,yes,wedid,thankstoVidalBuffay.

Phoebe:

'Cause,youknow,（inthatvoice）ifyoudon'tlookgood,wedon'tlookgood.Ilovethatvoice.

Rachel:

（entering,outofbreath）Airport,airport.Ross,notalone,Julie,armaroundher.Cramp,cramp.

Chandler:

Ok,Ithinkshe'stryingtotellussomething.Quick,gettheverbs.

（ShehitsChandler.）

Rachel:

（toChandler）You,you,yousaidhelikedme.（RossandJulieenter）You,youslowpokes!

Ross:

That'sallright,Rach,wegotthebags.Hi,hello.Julie,thisismysisterMonica.ThisisChandler. Phoebe. Joey,whatup?

Joey:

Whatup?

!

Ross:

Everyone,thisisJulie.

Rachel:

（outofbreath）Julie.

All:

Ohh.（Happily）Hi!

Julie:

Hi,butI'mnothere,youhaven'tmetme.I'llmakeamuchbetterfirstimpressiontomorrowwhenIdon'thave20hoursofcabandplaneonme.

Ross:

Andbus.

Julie:

Ohmygod.

Ross:

 Thescreamingguy?

Julie:

 Andthespitting?

Ross:

Yougottahearthisstory.

Julie:

We'reonthisbus,that'seasily200yearsold...

Ross:

200atleast.

Julie:

 ...andthisguy...

Rachel:

Andthechickenpoopedinherlap.Oh,I'msosorry.Ijustgaveawaytheending,didn'tI?

Oh!

It'sjust,Ijustheardthisstoryinthecab,anditisallIcanthinkabout.

Monica:

Thisisamazing.Imean,how,howdidthishappen?

Julie:

Well,RossandIwereingradschooltogether.

Ross:

Butwehaven'tseeneachothersincethen.WellIlandinChina,guesswho'sinchargeofthedig.

Rachel:

Julie!

Julie,isn'tthatgreat?

Imean,isn'tthatjustkick-you-in-the-crotch,spit-on-your-neckfantastic?

Monica:

（toJulie）It'sanexpression.

Ross:

Well,wejustwantedtosayaquickhi,andthenwe'regonnagoseethebaby.

Julie:

Andthenwe'vegottagetsomesleep.

Ross:

Yeah,it'sreally6:

00tomorrownightourtime.

Chandler:

Well,listen,don'ttelluswhat'sgonnahappenthough,'causeIliketobesurprised.

（RossandJulieexit）

Rachel:

Bye.（Sheclosesthedoorandeveryonetriestosympathizewithher.）

[Scene:

CentralPerk,RossandChandlerenter.]

Ross:

Hey,Rach,canIgetsomecoffee?

Rachel:

Yeah,sure.

Ross:

Thankyou.

Chandler:

Hey,Rach,canIget...

Rachel:

Didyoutalktohim?

Chandler:

Notyet.

Rachel:

Then,no.

（HegoestositdownnexttoRoss.）

Chandler:

SowhatthehellhappenedtoyouinChina?

Imean,whenlastweleftyou,youweretotallyinlovewith,youknow.

Ross:

Iknow,IknowIwas,buttherewasalwaysthislittlevoiceinsidethatkeptsayingit'snevergonnahappen,moveon.Youknowwhosevoicethatwas?

Chandler:

God?

Ross:

Itwasyou,pal.

Chandler:

Well,maybeitwasGod,doingme.

Ross:

Look,youwereright.Shelooksatmeandseesafriend,that'sall.ButthenImetJulie,andIdon'tknow,we'rehavin'agreattime.AndIhavetosay,Ineverwould'vegoneforitwithherifithadn'tbeenforyou.

Chandler:

Well,youowemeone,bigguy.

Rachel:

（ToRoss）Here'syourlemonade.

Ross:

Ididn'torderlemonade.

Rachel:

Oh.Wellthen,youbettergotakethatbackbecausethey'regonnachargeyouforthat.

Ross:

But...

Rachel:

Go-go-go-go,comeon!

（Rossgoesovertothecounte）（toChandler）Souh,whatdidyoufindout?

Chandler:

Hesaid...hesaid,hesaidthatthey'rehavingagreattime.I'msorry.But,thesilverlining,ifyouwannaseeit,isthathemadethedecisionallbyhimself!

 Withoutanyoutsidehelpwhatsoever.

Rachel:

Howisthatthesilverlining?

Chandler:

Youhavetoreallywannaseeit.

[Scene:

MonicaandRachel's,RossandthegangiswatchingSumowrestlingonTV.]

Ross:

Ironically,thesearetheguyswhowerepickedlastingym.

[CuttoPhoebeandMonicainthekitchen.]

Monica:

Pheebes,youknowwhatI'mthinking?

Phoebe:

Oh,ok.How,it'sbeensolongsinceyou'vehadsex,you'rewonderingifthey'vechangedit?

Monica:

No,althoughnowthat'swhatI'mthinking.

Phoebe:

Allright,sowhatwereyouthinking?

Monica:

Well,Iwasthinking,thatyougavetheguyssuchgreathaircuts,Ithought,maybeyou'dliketodomine?

Phoebe:

Ohh!

No.

Monica:

Whynot?

Phoebe:

Because,I'mjust,I'mincrediblyanalandanunbelievablecontrolfreak.

Monica:

Noyou'renot.

Phoebe:

IknowI'mnot,butyouare,andIwastryingtospareyourfeelings.

（Thephonerings.）

Joey:

（answeringthephone）Hello?

Oh,hi.Yeah,holdonasecond.Ross,it'sJulie,foryou.（Throwshimthephone.）

Ross:

（onphone）Hello?

Hi.

Chandler:

（entering）Hi.Anybodyknowagoodtailor?

Joey:

Needssomeclothesaltered?

Chandler:

No,no,I'mjustlookingforamantodrawonmewithchalk.

Joey:

Whydon'tyougoseeFrankie?

Myfamily'sbeengoin'tohimforever.HedidmyfirstsuitwhenIwas15.Nowait,16.No,'scuseme,15.（stillconfused）Allright,whenwas1990?

Chandler:

Okay. YouhavetostoptheQ-tipwhenthere'sresistance!

Ross:

（onphone）Ok,ok,sweetheart,I'llseeyoulater.Ok,bye.What?

（SitsdownnexttoRachel）Oh,thatissosweet.No,no,ok,youhangup.Ok,ok,one,two,three.（Doesn'thangupandmotionsforRacheltobequiet）Wellyoudidn'thangupeither.

Rachel:

Shedidn'thangupeither!

Ross:

Ok,no,no,youhangup.You,you,y...

Rachel:

（takingthephoneandhangingitup）Sorry,Ithoughtyouweretalkingtome.

Ross:

Rachel!

I'lljustcallherback.

Rachel:

Okay!

Ross:

（callsJulieback）Hi?

 Sorry,wegotdisconnected...（Walksaway.）

Rachel:

（toMonica）Ok,ok,ok.Howdidthishappentome?

Howdidthishappentome?

Aweekago,twoweeksago,Iwasfine.RosswasjustRoss,justthisguy.Nowhe'sRrrooossss,oh,thisreallygreatguythatIcan'thave.

Monica:

Sweetie,Iwantedyoutohavehimtoo.

Rachel:

Iknowyoudid.I'mjustgonnadealwithit,I'mjustgonnadealwithit.（Rosscomesby,smochingwithJulieonthephone.）Igottagetoutofhere.（Exits）

Chandler:

Ok,Idon'tcarewhatyouguyssay,something'sbotheringher.

[Scene:

MonicaandRachel's,thenextmorning.]

Joey:

（toChandler）Youknow,IthinkIwassixteen.

Monica:

（toPhoebe）Please,justalittlebitofftheback.

Phoebe:

I'mstillon"no."

Rachel:

（pokingherheadinfromherbedroom）Uh,morning.Doyouguysthinkyoucouldcloseyoureyesforjustasec?

Joey:

No-no-no-no-no,（grabshispants）I'mnotfallin'forthatagain.

Phoebe:

What'sgoin'on?

Rachel:

Well,Isortadidastupidthinglastnight.

Chandler:

Whatstupidthingdidyoudo?

Paulo:

（enteringfromRachel'sroom）Bongiornotutti!

Phoebe:

Ewww!

（Getsupandwalksaway.）

CommercialBreak

[Scene:

MonicaandRachel's,continuedfromearlier.]

Rachel:

Ok,Paulo,whydon'tyoujustgogetdressed,andthenyoubeonyourway,ok,bye-bye.（Paulogoesintohisroom.）

Monica:

Rachel,howdidthishappen?

Rachel:

Idon'tknow,Ijustkindaranintohimlastnight.

Phoebe:

Where?

Rachel:

Athisapartment.Isthisjuice?

Joey:

Whoa,whoa.AndthefactthatyoudumpedhimbecausehehitonPhoebe?

Rachel:

OhGod,IknowI'mapatheticloser.

Monica:

Honey,you'renotpathetic,you'resad.

Chandler:

Peopledostupidthingswhenthey'reupset.

Monica:

Mygod,ifIhadanickelforeveryguyIwishIhadn't...（Everyonelooksather）,butthisisaboutyourhorriblemistake.

（RossandJulieenter.）

All:

Hi!

Ross:

Hi.Sorrywe'relatebutwewere—well,therewastouching.

Paulo:

（entering）Hey,heyRoss.

Ross:

Hey,Paulo.Whatareyoudoinghere?

Paulo:

IdoRaquel.

Ross:

（toRachel）So,uh,he'sback.

Rachel:

Yeah,he'sback.Isthataproblem?

Ross:

No,notaproblem.