晨读美文人生如歌.docx

晨读美文人生如歌.docx

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晨读美文人生如歌

ABeautifulMemory

Er...theloveliesthousethatI'veeverlivedinwasone

thatIlivedinwithmygrandparentswhenIwasachild.

AndthenameofthehousewasCrosslands.

AndIhavesomeveryhappymemoriesofCrosslands.

Itwas,itseemed,sohugetomeasachild.

Andithadalovelylivingroomwithapianoinit

andalovelysortofhallwithlotsofcarpets

andchestsandantiquesandsoon.Andtherewasamysteriousroom,

itwasthedrawingroom,andweonlyuseditonSundays,

orwhenthevicarcamefortea,

orChristmasDayorEasterDay,

andIwasusedtobeamazedaboutthisroom

becauseithadthebestfurnitureinit

butitwascoveredupwithsheets-

itwasasifallthefurniturewaswearingclothes-

anditseemedtomeridiculous

thatwecouldn'tenjoythisbeautifulfurniture

alltheweekthroughreally.

Andprobablymyfavoriteroomwasthekitchen.

Ithadalovelyredflagstonefloor,

whichwasalwayshighlypolished,andanAga,

youknow,oneofthosebigcookers

thatheatsthewholeroomsoitwasalwayswarmthere,

andtherewasakindofclotheshorseaboveit

thatweusedtohangallourclotheson,

anditwasjustlovely.Itwasaverywarmroom

withbakedbreadandmygrandmotherusedtomakeicecream

andwe'deatitinthereand...

therewasavegetablegardenleadingfromthere

soIspentalotoftimeinthevegetablegarden

pickingpeasandeatingthem—mygrandmotherusedto

getreallycrosswithmebecauseIusedto

pickallthevegetablesandthefruitforourmeals

andthenI'deathalfofthem,

becausetheytastedsodeliciouscomingfreshfromthegarden.

Now,Iwentbacktoitafewyearsagoanditwasabigmistake.

They'vemodernizeditinside,

they'vegotridofthoselovelyoldfire-places...

havejustgone.Andthey'veknockedawalldown

sothedrawingroomandthelivingroomhave

becomeonebigmodernplastickindofroom.

ButIthinkwhatupsetmemostaboutitwasthefeeling

thatthehousehadshrunk,

ithadbecomesmallerandthatmymemoryof

thislovelylargewarmcomfortablehouse

hadturnedintoanoldhousewithmodernizedroomsinsideit.

Andittaughtmealessonreally,

thatyoucan'tgobackonthepastandrecaptureit.

Butthere'sabeautifulmemorythere.

Dad’sMandolin

Myfatherwasaself-taughtmandolinplayer.

Hewasoneofthebeststringinstrumentplayersinourtown.

Hecouldnotreadmusic,butifheheardatuneafewtimes,

hecouldplayit.Whenhewasyounger,

hewasamemberofasmallcountrymusicband.

Theywouldplayatlocaldancesandonafewoccasions

wouldplayforthelocalradiostation.

Heoftentoldushowhehadauditionedandearnedaposition

inabandthatfeaturedPatsyClineastheirleadsinger.

Hetoldthefamilythatafterhewashired

heneverwentback.Dadwasaveryreligiousman.

Hestatedthattherewasalotofdrinking

andcursingthedayofhisaudition

andhedidnotwanttobearoundthattypeofenvironment.

Occasionally,Dadwouldgetouthismandolin

andplayforthefamily.Wethreechildren:

Trisha,MonteandI,wouldoftensingalong.

SongssuchastheTennesseeWaltz,HarborLights

andaroundChristmastime,

thewell-knownrenditionofSilverBells.

“SilverBells,SilverBells,itsChristmastimeinthecity”

wouldringthroughoutthehouse.

Dadlovedtoplaythemandolinforhisfamily.

Heknewweenjoyedsinging,andhearinghimplay.

Hewaslikethat.Ifhecouldgivepleasuretoothers,

hewould,especiallyhisfamily.Hewasalwaysthere,

sacrificinghistimeandeffortstosee

thathisfamilyhadenoughintheirlife.

Ihadtomatureintoamanandhavechildrenofmyown

beforeIrealizedhowmuchhehadsacrificed.

InAugustof1993myfatherwasdiagnosed

withinoperablelungcancer.

Hechosenottoreceivechemotherapytreatments

sothathecouldliveouttherestofhislifeindignity.

Aboutaweekbeforehisdeath,

weaskedDadifhewouldplaythemandolinforus.

Hemadeexcusesbutsaid“okay”.

Heknewitwouldprobablybethelasttime

hewouldplayforus.

Hetuneduptheoldmandolinandplayedafewnotes.

WhenIlookedaround,therewasnotadryeyeinthefamily.

Wesawbeforeusaquiethumblemanwithaninnerstrength

thatcomesfromknowingGod,andlivingwithhiminone'slife.

Dadwouldneverplaythemandolinforusagain.

Wefeltatthetimethathewouldn'thaveenoughstrengthtoplay,

andthatmakesthememoryofthatdayevenstronger.

Dadwasdoingsomethinghehaddoneallhislife,giving.

Assickashewas,hewasstillpleasingothers.

Dadsurecouldplaythatmandolin!

EnteringtheNewRoomofYourLife

Itmustbeoneofthemostfrequentlyaskedquestions

intheEnglishlanguage—

“Whatdoyouwanttobewhenyougrowup?

”

Andformostofustheanswerissimple—

“Idon'tknow.”Andthat'sjustfine.

Forteenagersallovertheworlditisdifficulttoimagine

lifeoutsidethefamiliarschoolgrounds

andcomfortablefamilyhome.

Butwhentheuniversityentranceexamsfinish

andhigh-schoolgraduationwrapsup,

itistimetomoveontoawholenewstage

inone'slife—adulthood.

Onedaywhenyouare40,youmaylookbackonyourlife

andwonderexactlyhowyoubecameanadult.

Whendidyouchange?

Quiteoftentheanswerwilllie

betweenyourfirstdayofuniversity

andthefirstdayofyourprofessionalcareer.

Whileyoucannotpinpointanexacttime,

somewhereinthe“roommatedays”or“dormdays”

youlearntthingsfarmorevaluablethananything

youcouldlearninaclassroom.

Foritisinthistimewelearnindependence-

MumandDadcan'ttakecareofyouanymore;

responsibility—youhavetocleanyourownbedroom

andmakeyourownmeals;maturity—

suddenlyjokingabout“girl'sgerms”doesn'tseemsofunny

whenyouactuallyhaveagirlfriendorboyfriend;

respect—youshouldtakecareofJohn'scomputer,

hespentalotofmoneyonit;andbudgeting—

shouldyouspendyourlast$50onnewshoesorpizza?

Andabigpartoftheliving-away-from-homeprocess

iscommunication.High-classcelebritiesand

highlypaidpsychologistsarealwaystellingus,

tofixourrelationshipproblems,

“thekeyiscommunication.”

Andnothingcanprovidebettertrainingin

developingcommunicationthanlivingwithotherpeople.

“Whosedirtysocksarethese?

”

“Whereisyourshareoftherentmoney?

”

“Let'shaveapartyonFridaynight!

”

“IthinkI'mgoingtobreak-upwithmyboyfriend.”

Thisspecialperiodoftimeisguaranteedto

makeyoufeeleveryemotionpossible,

butatthesametimeitwillprovideyou

withthebestmemoriesyoucouldeverdreamof.

Whenthe“dormdays”cometoanend,

wefinallyknowwherewebelongintheworld.

Andfinally,weknowexactlywhatwewanttobewhenwegrowup.

FailureisaGoodThing

Lastweek,mygrand-daughterstartedkindergarten,

andIwishedhersuccess.Iwaslying.

WhatIactuallywishforherisfailure.

Ibelieveinthepoweroffailure.

Successisboring.Successisproving

thatyoucandosomethingthatyoualreadyknowyoucando,

ordoingsomethingcorrectlythefirsttime,

whichcanoftenbeaproblematicvictory.

First-timesuccessisusuallyafluke.

First-timefailure,bycontrast,isexpected;

itisthenaturalorderofthings.

Failureishowwelearn.IhavebeentoldofanAfricanphrase

describingagoodcookas“shewhohasbrokenmanypots”.

Ifyou'vespentenoughtimeinthekitchento

havebrokenalotofpots,

probablyyouknowalotaboutcooking.

Ioncehadadinnerwithagroupofchefs,

andtheyspenttimecomparingknifewounds

andburnscars.Theyknewhowmuchcredibility

theirfailuresgavethem.

Iearnmylivingbywritingadailynewspapercolumn.

EachweekIamawarethatonecolumn

isgoingtobetheworstcolumn.

Idon'tsetouttowriteit;Itrymybesteveryday.

Ihavelearnedtocherishthatcolumn.

Asuccessfulcolumnusuallymeans

thatIamtreadingonfamiliarground,

goingwiththetricksthatworkordressingup

popularsentimentsinfancywords.

Ofteninmyinferiorcolumns,

Iamtryingtopulloffsomething

I'veneverdonebefore,

somethingI'mnotevensurecanbedone.

Myyoungerdaughterisatrapezeartist.

Shespentthreeyearsputtingtogetheranact.

Shediditsuccessfullyforyears.

Therewasnoreasonforhertochangetheact—

butshedidanyway.Shesaidshewasnolonger

learninganythingnewandshewasbored.

Soshechangedtheact.Sheriskedfailure

andprofoundpublicembarrassmentinordertofeedhersoul.

Mygranddaughterisaperfectionist.

Shewillfeelherfailures,

andIwillwanttocomforther.ButIwillalso,

Ihope,remindherofwhatshelearned,

andhowshecandowhateveritisbetternexttime.

IhopeIcantellher,though,

thatit'snottheendoftheworld.

Indeed,withluck,itisthebeginning.

FreeUpTimetoDoWhatYouLoveMost

TwoyearsagoShirleyMichelsofSt.Louisfoundherself

gettingupearlierandearlier,

andgoingtobedlaterandlater,

justtomeeteverydaydemands.

Thewife,motherandophthalmictechnician

metherresponsibilities，butlackedtimeforthethings

thatmatteredmost.Sheandherhusband,Vic,anattorney,

begansearchingforwaystosimplifytheirlives.

“Wehadtodecidewhatwasreallyimportant.”

saysShirley.Theyknewtheywantedmoretime

toplaywiththeirthree-year-oldson,Ryan,

toexerciseandeatright,andtonurturefriendships.

Sothecouplechosetolivemoremodestly，

shoppingwithcarefornecessities

andenjoyinginexpensivepleasuressuchasreading,

cookingandgoingtothepark.

Shirleyquitherjobandbeganworkingparttimefromhome.

Sheprintedupbusinesscardsthatread

“Atyourservicebuyyourselfalittletime”

andhiredherselfoutforpersonaltaskssuchassho