The population problem.docx
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Thepopulationproblem
第1段
2.1
Thepapermainlyintroducedthepopulationproblem,whichmakesmanyproblemsconflictingtoeconomy,society,resources,environment,especiallychallengingtoChina'ssocialsecuritysystemasaresultofincreasingtheretirementage. [修改]
∙[标点警示]英文标点符号之后通常须加空格。
∙[搭配警示] manyproblemsconflicting在本族语中很少使用。
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
problem,question,issue,matter均含“问题”之意。
第2段
3.1
ResearchMotivation [修改]
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
inquiry,investigation, research,survey均有“调查”之意。
第3段
4.1
Thepurposeofthispaperreferringtothepopulationbringsmanyproblems,suchasenvironmental,areduetothepopulationintermsofquantity,structureanddistributionofrapidchange,resultingintheconflictbetweenpopulationandeconomy,resources,environment. [修改]
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
bring,carry,take,fetch,get,convey,transport均有“带,拿,取”之意。
4.2
Mainlyinsocial,suchaseconomicimpact,costofpopulation,birthanddeath,thequalityofthepopulationandagingofthepopulation. [修改]
∙[标点警示]该句句首与上一句句尾标点符号之间空格缺失。
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
quality,property,feature,characteristic,peculiarity,trait,attribute,character均有“特性,特点,品质”之意。
第4段
5.1
PopulationagingprobleminChinaissevere,weshouldtakecareandfindthesolution. [修改]
∙[标点警示]英文标点符号之后通常须加空格。
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
earnest,serious,grave, severe,solemn,sober均有“严肃的”之意。
5.2
Itissaidthatthepopulationgrowthto1billionand295millionpopulationbytheyearof2000inChinaNationalBureauofStatisticsin2003-2012. [修改]
∙[标点警示]该句句首与上一句句尾标点符号之间空格缺失。
第5段
6.1
FromChinaNationalBureauofStatisticsin2007-2012wecanknowthatthepopulationisexpectedtocontinuetoincrease,andthespeedissofast. [修改]
∙[句子警示]英文标点符号之前无须空格。
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
haste, speed,hurry,dispatch均含“迅速,急速”之意。
6.2
Thedatadisplaysthepopulationwillincreaseto2billionand400millionin2050,anditshowsthelargenumberofChina'spopulationarethepeoplewhoseageis15to64inrecentyears. [修改]
∙[句子警示]英文标点符号之前无须空格。
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
exhibition,exhibit,show,exposition,fair, display 都可表示“展览,展览会”之意。
6.3
Astimegoesby,thenumberofpeoplewhoseageisolderthan65yearsisincreasing. [修改]
∙[标点警示]该句句首与上一句句尾标点符号之间空格缺失。
∙[拓展辨析] people表示“人,民族”。
查看与person的区别。
6.4
Accordingtotherelevantliterature,morethantenyearslater,thetotalpopulationofChinawillbelessthantheexistinglevel. [修改]
∙[标点警示]该句句首与上一句句尾标点符号之间空格缺失。
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
afterwards, later 均有“后来,以后”之意。
第6段
7.1
StatementsandProblems [修改]
第7段
8.1
ThispaperhasdiscussedtheChina'spopulationaginganditrelatedtosocialsecurityproblemsandeconomicproblems. [修改]
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
join,combine,unite,connect,link,attach,couple,associate, relate 均有“连接,结合,联合”之意。
8.2
ManyyearsofbirthcontrolpolicyhaveresultedinaseverepopulationagingprobleminChina. [修改]
8.3
Chinahasestablishedasocialsecuritysystemofacombinedsocialpoolingaccountandpersonalaccounts.[修改]
∙[拓展辨析]动名搭配 pool...account 在语料库中出现过 6 次
8.4
Foryears,fundsfrompersonalaccountsweredivertedtofillthegapinthesocialpoolingaccount,resultingingrowingsocialsecuritydebt. [修改]
∙[标点警示]英文标点符号之后通常须加空格。
∙[拓展辨析]动名搭配 grow...debt 在语料库中出现过 10 次
8.5
Whatwearefacingisnotthecompetitivepressurefromthelargeamountofpeople,buttheshortageoflabor.[修改]
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
lack,want,absence, shortage,scarcity均含“缺乏,不足”之意。
8.6
Whilethesocialsecuritysystemiscontrolledbythegovernment,andChina'ssocialsecuritysystemislargelyapay-as-you-gosystem,thenthesocialpressureheavierandheavierowingtotheproblem,wemustrevisethesecuritysystemthatdelayedretirementforexamplenow. [修改]
∙[句子警示]英文标点符号之前无须空格。
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
heavy,weighty都可表示“重的,沉重的”之意。
8.7
Thefollowing,consideringthatthepensionreplacementrateofmanpoweraccountishardtoobtain,soitwillcoordinatethemanpoweraccountfundsandpersonalaccountfundasaunifiedpensionfundstomeasure. [修改]
∙[拓展辨析]注意consider和believe区别。
8.8
Specificparameters'settingsandprojectionsarehighcontributionrates,highreplacementrates,andhighdebtinthesocialsecurityaccount. [修改]
∙[标点警示]英文标点符号之后通常须加空格。
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
account,report的有“报道,叙述”之意。
第8段
9.1
LiteratureReviewandReferencesincurrentresearchstatus [修改]
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
magazine,journal,periodical,publication,newspaper,review,press均有“出版物,定期刊物”之意。
第9段
10.1
Firstly,China'spopulationismoresevere. [修改]
10.2
(ChinaNationalBureauofStatistics(2003-2012))Itappearedthepopulationgrowthpeakthreetimeslastcentury,andthebirthratesareabove20perthousandafterentering90s,thebirthratesdecreasedyearbyyear. [修改]
∙[名词错误]请检查Statistics,确认大小写正确。
∙[句子警示]英文标点符号之前无须空格。
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
hill,mount,mountain,range, peak,volcano均含有“山”之意。
10.3
In2005droppedto12.40perthousand. [修改]
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
descend, drop,fall,sink都表示“落下,下降”之意。
10.4
ManyyearsofbirthcontrolpolicyhaveresultedinaseverepopulationagingprobleminChina. [修改]
∙[句子警示]英文标点符号之前无须空格。
10.5
Accordingtothepaper,althoughChina'spopulationismorethanIndia,butonly60%ofthepopulationofchildreninIndia,whichisthebirthrateofChina'spopulationisfarlowerthantheresultofIndia. [修改]
∙[标点警示]该句句首与上一句句尾标点符号之间空格缺失。
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
distant, far,remote都含有“远的”之意。
∙[其他]语法错误,连接词although和but在同一个句子中不可同时使用。
10.6
Accordingtofigureintheresearch,in2014China's14yearoldpopulationaccountedforonly16.5%ofthetotalpopulation,comparedto16.6%in2010anddown0.1%,hasbeeninaseriousminority,significantlylowerthantheworld'saverageof27%. [修改]
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
earth, world,globe均可表示“地球”之意。
10.7
Accordingtothecurrentbirthrateofthepopulationprojections,morethantenyearslater,thetotalpopulationofChinawillbelowerthantheexistinglevel.[修改]
∙[搭配警示] lowerthantheexistinglevel在本族语中很少使用。
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
modern,contemporary, current,recent,present,up-to-date均有“现代的,当代的”之意。
10.8
Duetotheagingintensifies,childrenundertheageof14droptobelow15%,overtheageof60nonlaboragingpopulationwillreachabout33%,20yearsoldofthefollowingnonlaborpopulationaboutisabout18%,nonlaborpopulationaccountedfor50%,thenthetotallaborforcepopulationwilldroptobelow5billion,ratherthan"within30yearswillremainatbetween700millionto800million". [修改]
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
fairly,pretty,quite, rather 都有“相当,颇”之意。
10.9
NationalBureauofstatisticsdatashowsthatin2012and2013,China'sworkingagepopulationrespectivelyoverthepreviousyeardecreasedby345million,244million,2014,overtheageof16to60yearsofage(notincluding60yearsofage)oftheworkingagepopulation91583people,overthepreviousyeardecreased371millionpeople,accountingforthetotalpopulationaccountedfor67%,comparedwiththepreviousyeardecreased6inathousand. [修改]
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
appear,emerge, show,loom均有“出现”之意。
10.10
Whatwearefacingisnotthepressureoflaborshortageandthestructuralunemploymentcausedbytheshortageoflabor. [修改]
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
appearance,look, face,aspect均含事物或人的“外表,容貌”之意。
第10段
11.1
Secondly,theone-childpolicycontributestotheproblem. [修改]
∙[句子警示]英文标点符号之前无须空格。
11.2
(ChinaMinistryofLaborandSocialSecurity(2001))China'spopulationagingproblemismoreseverethanothercountriesbecauseoftheone-childpolicyadoptedintheearly1980s,increasingtheretirementageandthecurrentsocialsecuritysystemisnotsustainable. [修改]
∙[拓展辨析]动名搭配 age...problem 在语料库中出现过 6 次
11.3
ItchallengestoChina'ssocialsecuritysystem. [修改]
11.4
Maintainingthecurrentreplacementandcontributionrates,socialsecuritydebtwillbeexplosive. [修改]
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
assert,affirm,allege, maintain,testify,claim均含有“断言,声称”之意。
11.5
Thenincreasetheretirementage. [修改]
第11段
12.1
Lastly,thecurrentsocialsecuritysystemisnotsustainable. [修改]
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
atlast,atlength,eventually,finally,intheend,lastly 均含有“最后,终于”之意。
12.2
(Diamond,P. [修改]
∙[句子错误]请检查句中谓语动词。
12.3
A.,&Barr,N. [修改]
∙[句子错误]请检查句中谓语动词。
12.4
(2006))Fundsfrompersonalaccountshavebeenusedtofinancethedeficitsinthesocialpoolingaccount. [修改]
∙[拓展辨析]动名搭配 finance...deficit 在语料库中出现过 263 次
12.5
Peopleolderthan60yearscanreceiveapension. [修改]
∙[句子警示]英文标点符号之前无须空格。
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
accept, receive,admit,take均有“接受,接纳”之意。
12.6
Socialproblemsindifferenttimesreflectthecontentofthedifferent,populationprobleminmodernareoneofthemostimportantsocialproblemsintheworld,isthecoreofmanysocialproblems. [修改]
∙[句子错误]请检查is,确认主谓一致。
∙[标点警示]英文标点符号之后通常须加空格。
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
different,various,diverse均含“不同的”之意。
详情点击
12.7
Althoughitisdifferentindifferentcountries,itsessenceismainlymanifestedinthepopulationreproductionandthematerialreproductionofthedisorder,populationgrowthovereconomicgrowthandtheemergenceofpopulationsurplus. [修改]
∙[标点警示]英文标点符号之后通常须加空格。
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
copy,duplicate,model, reproduction,facsimile均有“复制品”之意。
12.8
TakeChinaasanexample,allkindsofproblemsencounteredinthecurrentsociallifeanddevelopmentaredirectlyorindirectlyrelatedtotheenormouspressureofpopulation. [修改]
∙[搭配错误]请检查theenormouspressureofpopulation,本族语中很少使用。
∙[搭配错误]请检查thecurrentsociallife,本族语中很少使用。
∙[学习提示]易混词汇:
direct, directly 都有“直接地”之意。
12.9
Firstofall,thepopulationpressuretoprovidetheexistingpopulationlivingconditionsandimprovethelivingstandardsofthepeople,hasencounteredinsurmountabledifficulties. [修改]
∙[冠词警示] thepopulationpressure疑似冠词多余。
∙[学习