518 统练作文讲评汕头二模等组题 2.docx

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518 统练作文讲评汕头二模等组题 2.docx

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518 统练作文讲评汕头二模等组题 2.docx

518统练作文讲评汕头二模等组题2

第一节xie基础写作(汕头市金山中学2012-13学年第一学期期中考试)

你叫李华,你的英国笔友John来信说假期要来中国,在你所在的城市逗留十天,希望你给安排一下他的活动。

你刚好要参加志愿者工作,很想邀请他参加,理由如下:

1.志愿者工作可以帮助有困难的人,将使他的中国之行更加有意义;

2.比起去景点观光,志愿者工作不但能更深入到普通民众的生活,而且有助于了解当地的社会风俗。

【写作内容】

根据以上信息,给John写一封回信,说服他一起参加志愿者活动。

信的开头和结尾已经为你写好。

请在信中包括以下内容:

1.告诉John你的假期计划并邀请他共同参与;

2.陈述以上两条理由;

3.建议John加入你们,并表示等待他的答复。

【写作要求】

1.只能使用5个句子表达上述全部内容;2.文中不能出现真实姓名和学校名称。

DearJohn,

I’mpleasedtohearthatyouwillcometoChinathisvacation.

Bestwishes,

Yours,

LiHua

参考范文:

DearJohn,

I’mpleasedtohearthatyouwillcometoChinathisvacation.AsI’mgoingtoparticipateinvolunteerworkthisvacation,Ihopethatyouwilljoinus.AsfarasI’mconcerned,thevolunteerwork,givingyouanopportunitytohelppeopleinneed,willaddtothesignificancetoyourtriptoChina.Comparedwithgoingsightseeing,workingasavolunteerwillenableyoutogodeeperintoordinarypeople’slife.Inthemeanwhile,italsowillhelpyouknowaboutthelocalcustoms.Thus,IreallyhopeyoucanjoinusandI’mlookingforwardtoyourreply.

Bestwishes,

Yours,

LiHua

普遍问题:

1.work(工作):

不可数名词

2.join的用法:

1)称为...的一员;参加,加入join(anorganization,e.g.thearmy,aclub,theparty,acompany,…)

2)加入到某人之中;与某人一道去joinsb.(indoingsth./forsth.)

3)参加活动joinin(anactivity)

例句:

1)I’vejoinedthecarclub.

2)--Willyoujoinusforlunch?

–DoyoumindifIjoinyou?

I’msureyou’llalljoinmeinwishingthemaveryhappymarriage.

3)Shelistensbutsheneverjoinsinthediscussion.

3.suggest的用法:

1)suggestdoingsth.

2)suggest(that)sb.(should)dosth.

例句:

Isuggestgoingtherebyair.

Isuggestwegotherebyair.

4.hope的用法:

1)hopetodosth.

2)hope+that从句

例句:

1)Wehopetoarrivearoundtwoo’clock.

2)Let’shopewecanfindaparkingspace.

5.Comparedwithgoingsightseeing,doingthevoluntaryworkwillbringusmorebenefits.

6.句子的(逻辑)主语是什么?

*句子中出现多个不同的动词,要注意这些动词的逻辑主语是否正确!

错误的例子:

1)Comparedwithgoingsightseeing,volunteerworknotonlycaninvolveinordinarypeople’slifebutalsocanlearnmoreaboutthesocialtraditions.

2)Besides,comparedwithgoingsightseeing,thevoluntaryworkisabletoconnectyouwiththelocalpeopleandknowmoreabouttheirlife.

3)Moreimportantly,beingavolunteercannotonlygettoknowthe…butalsohelpyourealizethe…

正确的例子:

1)Beingavolunteer,youcannotonlygetclosertothe…butalsogettoknowthe…

2)Ifyoujoininthevoluntarywork,notonlycanyoulearnmoreaboutthelifeofordinarypeople,butyoucanalsolearnaboutthelocalcustoms.

3)Thevolunteerworkcannotonlymakeitpossibleforyoutoknowbetteraboutthenormalpeople’slifebutalsohelpyouknowthelocalcustomswell.

7.because从句:

不能单独成句!

1)IwasabsentfromschoolyesterdaybecauseIwassick.

2)BecauseIwassick,Iwasabsentfromschoolyesterday.

JustbecauseIdon’tcomplain,peoplethinkIamsatisfied.

好句子:

1.I’dliketotellyouthatIamgoingtobeavolunteerthisvacationandIhopeyoucanjoinme.

Workingasavolunteer,youcanhelpalotofpeoplewhoarefacedwithdifficulty,whichmakesyourtripmoremeaningful.

2.IsuggestyoujoinusandI’mlookingforwardtoyouranswer.

3.Duringthework,wenotonlycanhelppeopleinneed,butalsocanknowmoreaboutthelocaltraditionsandlife.

 

第二节读写任务(2013揭阳二模)

阅读下面的短文,然后按要求写一篇150字左右的英语短文。

MayorBloomberghasbeenthemayorofNewYorkCityfornearlynineyears,butfortenyearshehasbeenwearingthesameshoes.Thisisreallyraretobeseenonabillionaire.

“Themayorownstwopairsofworkshoes,”saidthespokesman.“Onedayhe’llwearone,thenexttheother.Whentheygotworndown,hehasthemrepaired.Hecouldbuyanyshoeshewanted,buthesayssincetheyarecomfortable,andtheywork,there’snoneedforanewpair.”Accordingtothespokesman,themayorsavesinhisfootwearandhealsokeepsitupinhispersonalaswellasgovernmentalfinance.“Whenhebuysacupofcoffee,hechoosesthesmallestsize.Hebuysonlywhatheneeds.”

SuchisthemayorofNewYorkCity,whocareslittleabouthisshoes,avoidswastingmoneyandfocuseshisattentiononhisworkandhispeopleinthecity.

Butwhataboutourfellowstudentsnowadays?

Somewearsuperexpensiveclothesandshoes;besides,theybuyasmanyaspossible,farmorethantwopairs.Theyalwayswantthelatest,thenewestandthrowtheoldonesawaythoughtheyhaven’twornthemformanytimes.

【写作内容】

1.以约30个词概括以上短文的内容。

2.以约120个词就“勤俭节约”这一主题发表你的感想和看法,内容包括:

(1)给出你对这位市长的评价;

(2)举一个你尊敬的人勤俭节约的例子,说明他对你的影响;

(3)列举你生活中浪费的坏习惯并说说你勤俭节约的决心。

【写作要求】

1.作文中可以使用亲身经历或虚构的故事,也可以参照阅读材料的内容,但不得直接引用原文中的句子;

2.作文中不能出现真实姓名和学校名称。

【评分标准】概括准确,语言规范内容合适,语篇连贯。

参考词汇:

节俭的provident/thrifty

一.Summary部分:

●两个要点

范文:

TheauthorintroducestousthemayorofNewYorkCity,amanwhoisrichbutprovident.Theauthoralsopointsoutnowadayssomestudentshavethehabitofwastingthings.

Summary部分的普遍问题:

1.两个要点信息的处理:

平行?

次要?

几个不恰当处理的例子:

(1)把当今学生的行为写成是次要的信息

1)MayorBloomberghasbeenwearingthesameshoesfortenyears.Heavoidswastingmoneyandpayshisattentiontohiscity.Whathehasdoneisverydifferentfromthestudentstoday.

2)MayorBloombergisthemayorofNewYorkCity,whoisprovidentinhispersonalandgovernmentfinance.Themayorbehavesdifferentlyfromthefellowstudents,whocausemuchwasteinbuyingunnecessarythings.

3)MayorBloomberg,themayorofNewYork,aprovidentmanwearsonlytwoshoesfor10year.Heavoidswastingmoneyandfocusesonhisworkunlikeourfellowstudentswhoalwaysbuyexpensivethings.

4)Unlikethestudentsnowadayswhospendmuchmoneyinwearing,MayorBloomberghasbeenwearingthesameshoesformanyyears.Heavoidswastingmoneyinhispersonalaswellasgovernmentalfinance.

(2)把市长的“节俭”写成是次要的信息

5)MayorBloomberg,themayorofNewYorkCity,whocareslittleabouthispersonallifetosavemoney,payshisattentiononhisworkandhispeopleinthecity.Whilethefellowstudentsareonthecontrary.

2.用什么时态?

Hehasbeenwearingthesameshoesfortenyears.

Hefocusesonhiswork.

*尚健在的人:

现在时

*已故去的人:

过去时

3.有从句,没有主句

错:

ThemayorofNewYorkCity,Bloombery,whowasprovidentinhislife.

对:

ThemayorofNewYorkCity,Bloombery,wasprovidentinhislife.

4.while的用法

 

二.正文部分:

(1)给出你对这位市长的评价;

(2)举一个你尊敬的人勤俭节约的例子,说明他对你的影响;

(3)列举你生活中浪费的坏习惯并说说你勤俭节约的决心。

审题:

文章的内容和结构:

这位市长……(作为一位亿万富翁和一市之长,勤俭节约、一心为公,值得尊敬,值得学习。

我的……也是这样一位勤俭节约/值得尊敬的人。

TA……(他/她的一些勤俭节约的做法/事例)。

TA的勤俭深深地影响了我……(我认识到…/我也怎样做了)。

然而,我还有一些浪费的坏习惯:

我……。

现在我决心……(向他们学习,做一个勤俭节约的人,在日常生活中,……)。

问题:

●什么是“勤俭节约”?

写什么样的事例才能表现这个人的勤俭节约?

●写什么人:

身边的人?

名人或伟人?

●写什么样的例子:

1)这个人平常的做法?

这个人某次的例子?

2)怎样的例子才令人信服?

---不要写不符合生活情理的例子,或者太过于夸张的例子。

1.写名人或伟人的:

孙中山、周恩来、邓小平、郭明义……

例1:

DrSunYat-sen,fatherofChina,isoneofthepersonsthatIrespectmost.Hewascalled“BuYi”presidentbecausehewasprovident.Asapresident,heworethesameclothesandatethesamefoodastheordinarypeopledidatthattime.Andhewasopposedtowasting.Thoughasapresident,hecouldenjoyhisprivilegesbuthedidn’t.It’shisprovidencethatimpressesmemost.Hisstoryencouragesmetobeprovidentandtrymybesttoavoidwasting,suchasbuyingthethingsthatIreallyneedbutnotjustforfun.

例2:

Whenitcomestoprovidence,Ican’thelpthinkingofmymodel---GuoMingyi.Heisanordinaryworker,buthetriestosavemoneyandhelpothersinneedheartandsoul.Thoughhedoesn’thaveahighsalary,hesupportsseveralpoorfamilieswithhisownmoney.Asforhimself,helivesasimpleandhardlife.Heneverwastesacoinandhealwayswearsthesameuniform.I’mdeeplymovedbyhisprovidence,andIhavedecidedtofollowhimandneverwastemoney.

例3:

WhenwerefertothenameBillGates,thereisnodenyingthefactthatheistherichestmaninUSA.Buttooursurprise,heneverownsapersonalhelicopterorbuysanyguest’sticket.Instead,healwaysbuysanordinaryplaneticketwhentravellingonbusiness.Hehasleftmeadeepimpression,andIconsiderhimamymodelnottocauseanyunnecessarywaste.BillandBloombergcouldevenkeepupsaving,whyshouldwestudentswastetoomuchwithoutearningeverything?

2.写身边的家人或朋友的:

例4:

Themayorremindsmeofmyuncle,whoisaprovidentmantoo.Myunclehasasuccessfulbusinessandheisamillionaire.Thoughhehassomuchmoney,heneverwastes.Hewearstheordinaryshoesanddrivesanordinarycar.SinceIwasyoung,myunclehastaughtmenottowastemoneyonwhatIdon’treallyneedandIkeephiswordsinmindeversince.

例5:

Thestoryremindsmeofoneofmyfriends.Unlikemyotherfriendswhoalwayswearfashionableclothes,hewearshisclotheswhichlooksoordinary.Andhedoesn’tchangehisclothestoooftenbecausehethinksthatheonlyneedstobuynewclotheswhenheisreallyinneedofthem.IammovedbyhimsoIregardhimasamodel.Gradually,Ibecomeaprovidentpersontoo.

例6:

Inmylife,mymother,whoisalwaysprovidentandneverwastesmoney,hasabiginfluenceonme.OnceIwasgoingtothrowawaysomeofmyoldclothes,whichIhadn’twornformanytimes,justbecausetheyhadbeenoutoffashion.Whenmymotherknewthis,shecriticizedmeandtoldmethatIwasluckbecausemanychildrenintheworldhadnowarmclothestowear,soIshouldlearntobeprovident.Hearingmymother’swordsandthinkingthatsheneverthrowsawayanythingthatcanbeused,Iimmediatelyrealizedmymistakeandmadeupmymindtobethrifty.

例7:

Sodoesmymother.Sheneverspendsextramoneyonherselfsothatsheneverownssomethingotherwomenhave.Shewillsowbrokenclothesiftheyarestillabletobeworn.Andshewillkeeptheleftfoodifitisunabletobeeatenatthattime.Andshealways

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