Friends老友记六人行中英文对照剧本第二季第二十二集.docx
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Friends老友记六人行中英文对照剧本第二季第二十二集
Friends老友记六人行中英文对照剧本第二季
222TheOneWiththeTwoParties
[Scene:
MoondanceDiner.Ross,Phoebe,Joey,andChandleraresittingatthecounter,Monicaisworking.Monicaiswearinghercostume,includingbigfakebreasts.]
MONICA:
So,I'llgetcandlesandmymom'slacetablecloth,andsinceit'sRachel'sbirthday,Imean,wewantittobespecial,IthoughtI'dpoachasalmon.
ALL:
Ohhh.
MONICA:
What?
ROSS:
Question.Whydowealwayshavetohavepartieswhereyoupoachthings?
MONICA:
Youwannabeinchargeofthefoodcommittee?
ROSS:
Questiontwo.Whydowealwayshavetohavepartieswithcommittees?
JOEY:
Really.Whycan'twejustgetsomepizzasandgetsomebeersandhavefun?
ROSS:
Yeah.
PHOEBE:
Yeah,Iagree.Yaknow,Ithinkfancypartiesareonlyfunifyou'refancyontheinsideandI'mjustnotsureweare.
MONICA:
Alright.Ifyouguysdon'twantittobespecial,fine.Youcanthrowanykindofpartyyouwant.
[JoeyisstaringatMonica'sbreasts]
MONICA:
Joeythey'renotreal.Istartmilesbeneaththesurfaceofthesethings,ok,they'refake.See[squeezesherbreast]honkhonk.
CHANDLER:
Wow,it's,it'slikepornoforclowns.
OPENINGTITLES
[Scene:
CentralPerk.Chandler,Ross,Joey,Phoebe,andMonicaareplanningRache'sbirthdayparty.]
ROSS:
ItalkedtoRachel'ssisters,neitherofthemcancome.
MONICA:
Ok,umso,IstillhavetoinviteDillonandEmmaandShannonCooper.
JOEY:
Woah,woah,woah,uh,noShannonCooper.
PHOEBE:
Whynother?
JOEY:
Causesheuh,shestealsstuff.
CHANDLER:
Ormaybeshedoesn'tstealstuffandJoeyjustsleptwithherandnevercalledherback.
MONICA:
Joeythatishorriable.
JOEY:
HeyIlikedher,alright.Maybe,maybetoomuch.Idon'tknowIguessIjustgotscared.
PHOEBE:
I'msorry,Ididn'tknow.
JOEY:
Ididn'tthinkanyone'dbuythat,ok.
[Rachelenters]
ROSS:
Hihoney,howdiditgo?
RACHEL:
Agh,itwasthegraduationfromhell.
CHANDLER:
Yaknow,mycousinwenttohellonafootballscholarship.
RACHEL:
Yaknow,Imeanthisissupposedtobeajoyousoccasion.Mysister'sgraduatingfromcollege,nobodythoughtshewould.It'satruetestamenttowhatagirlfromlongislandwoulddoforaCelica.
MONICA:
Sowhathappened?
RACHEL:
Myparentshappened.Alltheyhadtodowassitinthesamestadium,smileproudly,andnottalkaboutthedivorce.Butnooo,theygotintoahugefightinthemiddleofthecommencementaddress.BishopTutuactuallyhadtostopandshushthem.Butyouknowwhat,youknowwhatthegoodnewsis?
Igettoservecoffeeforthenext8hours.
PHOEBE:
Ok,soIguesswedon'tinviteherparents.
MONICA:
Well,howboutjusthermom?
CHANDLER:
Whyhermom?
MONICA:
CauseIalreadyinvitedher.
PHOEBE:
Ooh,ooh,didyouaskStacyRoth?
JOEY:
Ohno,can'tinviteher.Shealsosteals.
[Scene:
MonicaandRachel'sapartment.Chandler,Joey,Monica,andPhoebearesettingupfortheparty.]
PHOEBE:
Ok,herearethebirthdaycandles.Where'sthebirthdaycake?
MONICA:
Ok,we'renothavingbirthdaycake,we'rehavingbirthdayflan.
CHANDLER:
Excuseme?
MONICA:
It'satraditionalMexicancustarddessert.
JOEY:
Ohthat'snice.HappybirthdayRachel,here'ssomegoo.
[knockatthedoor]
MONICA:
[answersthedoor]Dr.Greene.OhmyGodit'sRachel'sdad.What'reyoudoinghere?
MR.GREENE:
What?
Thefathercan'tdropbytoseethedaughteronherbirthday?
MONICA:
Nono,thefathercan,butum,sinceIamtheroommateIcantellyouthatshe'snothereandI'llpassalongthemessage,ok.Sobye-bye.
MR.GREENE:
Ohhh,you'rehavingaparteee.
MONICA:
No,no,notaparty.JustasurprisegatheringofsomepeopleRachelknows.Um,thisisPhoebeandChandlerandJoey.
MR.GREENE:
I'llneverrememberallofthat.Souh,what'sthedeal?
Rachelcomeshome,peoplepopoutandyellstuff,isthatit?
CHANDLER:
Thisisn'tyourfirstsurpriseparty,isitsir?
[knockatthedoor,MonicaanswerstoseeMrs.Greene]
MRS.GREENE:
HiMonica.
[Monicaslamsthedoorbackshut]
MONICA:
Chinesemenuguy.Forgotthemenus.
CHANDLER:
So,basicallyjustaChineseguy.
JOEY:
Uh,hey,Dr.Greene,whydon'tyoucomewithme,we'llputyourjacketonRachel'sbed.
MR.GREENE:
Alright,thatsoundslikeatwopersonjob.[theywalkintoRachel'sbedroom]
MRS.GREENE:
Well,mygoodness,whatwasthat?
MONICA:
Sandra,Iamsosorry,IthoughtyouwereRachelandwejustweren'treadyforyouyet.
MRS.GREENE:
YouthoughtIwasRachel?
CHANDLER:
Yesbecauseuh,youlooksoyoung.
PHOEBE:
Andbecauseyou'reboth,youknow,whitewomen.
MRS.GREENE:
Oh,Imissedyoukids.Well,shouldIputmycoatinthebedroom?
CHANDLER:
NO!
No,I'lltakethatforya.
MRS.GREENE:
Ohwellthankyou.Suchagentleman.Thankyou.[Chandlertakesthehotpinkcoatandgrimacesatit]Ahh,italllookssonice,sofestive,alltheballoons...[Chandler,rememberingthatJoeyandMr.Greeneareinthebedroom,throwshercoatinacupboard]Thefunniestthinghappenedtomeonthewayhere.Iwas...[Joeypeeksout]
PHOEBE:
[cuttingMrs.Greeneoff]Ha-ha,that'sgreat,ha-ha.Ican'twaittoheartherestofit,yaknow,butIreallyhavetogotothebathroomso...Hey,comewithme.Yeah,yeah,it'llbelikewe'regalpals,yaknow,likeatarestraunt.Oh,it'llbefun,c'mon.[theygointhebathroom]
MONICA:
OhmyGod,ohmyGod,ohmyGod.
CHANDLER:
Ok,think,whatwouldJackandChrissydo?
JOEY:
[peeksbackout]Ok,nowthatyourcoatissafelyinthebedr-,[seesthatthecoastisclear]oh,okwecancomebackoutinthelivingroom.
MONICA:
Souh,JoeyandChanlder,I,Ithinkit'stimethatyoutakeDr.Greeneovertoyourplace.
CHANDLER:
Uhh,yes,absdolutely,um.Whyagain?
MONICA:
Becausethat'swherethepartyisyougoon.Seethisisjustthestagingarea.
JOEY:
Rightthisisstaging.
CHANDLER:
Yeah,thismorethananythingelse,isthestagingarea.
JOEY:
[asthey'rewalkingout,Dr.GreenequestioninglygesturesattheHappyBirthdaysignoverthedoor]Thisisclearlyinthewrongapartment.[theyallwalkacrossthehall]
[Scene:
Lateroninthehallwaybetweentheapartments.Chandlerisshowingpeopletotheparties.]
CHANDLER:
Alrightyouguysareofftopartynumberone[ushers3guysintoMonica'sapartment]andyou,youareofftopartynumbertwo[ushersfourwomenintohisapartment.TwoguystrytofollowandChandlerblocksthemandshoosthemofftoMonica'sapartment]Alrightfellas,let'skeepitmovin',let'keepitmovin.
MONICA:
Chandlercouldyouatleastsendsomewomentomyparty?
[buzzergoesoff]Alrightthat'sRoss.
CHANDLER:
Ok,they'recoming,shhh.[RunsintoMonica'sapartmentandgrabsonelastgirltotaketohisapartment]
RACHEL:
Ohh,thankyouforthewonderfuldinner.
ROSS:
Thanksforbeingborn.
RACHEL:
Ohh,thankyouformybeautiulearrings,they'reperfect.Iloveyou.
ROSS:
Oh,nowyoucanexchangethemifyouwant,ok.
RACHEL:
NowIloveyouevenmore.
[theykissandRossbacksherintoherapartmentandturnsonthelights]
ALL:
Surprise.
RACHEL:
Ohmygosh,wow.Monica.Ohmygod.Mom.Thisissogreat.
MRS.GREENE:
Happybirthdaysweetie.
RACHEL:
Wowyou,you.Ihadnoidea.
ROSS:
Really?
RACHEL:
No,Iknew.
ROSS:
Allright.
MONICA:
Ok,everybody,there'sfoodanddrinksonthetable.Goacrossthehall.
ROSS:
What?
RACHEL:
What?
MONICA:
Rightnow,JoeyandChandler's,gonow.
RACHEL:
Why.
MONICA:
Justgo.
[theywalkacrossthehall]
ALL:
Surprise.
MR.GREENE:
Happybirthdaysweetpea.
RACHEL:
Daddy.
[Adbreak.Timelapse.StillatpartyatChandlerandJoey's.RachelistalkingtoChandlerandRoss.]
RACHEL:
Bothofthemarehere,bothofthem,bothofthemarehere?
CHANDLER:
Well,wecouldcountagain.
RACHEL:
Ican'tbelievethisishappening.
ROSS:
Youknowwhat,thisisridiculous,ok.Thisisyourbirthday,thisisyourparty.Isaywejustput'emalltogetherandiftheycan'tdealwithit,whocares.
RACHEL:
Ido.
ROSS:
That'swho.
CHANDLER:
Look,areyougonnabeok?
RACHEL:
Well,Ihavetobe,Idon'treallyhaveachoice,Imean,youknow,Icouldlookatthebrightside,Igettwobirthdaypartiesandtwobirthdaycakes.
CHANDLER:
Well,actuallyjustonebirthdayflan.
RACHEL:
What?
CHANDLER:
It'satraditionalMexicancustarddessert...LooktalktoMonica,she'sonthefoodcommittee.
[Timelapse.Chandlerrunsoutofthebathroom.]
CHANDLER:
Joey,Joey.Hey,somegirljustwalkeduptomeandsaid,'IwantyouDennis,'andstuckhertoungedownmythroat.Ilovethisparty.
JOEY:
Quickvolleyballquestion.
CHANDLER:
Volleyball.
JOEY:
Yeah,wesetupacourtinyourroom.Uh,youdidn'treallylikethatgreylamp,didyou?
CHANDLER:
Joey,awomanjuststuckhertoungedownmythroat,I'mnotevenlisteningtoyou.
GIRL'SVOICE:
Dennis.
CHANDLER:
Ok,that'sme.[runsback]
RACHEL:
Listenhoney,canyoukeepdadoccupied,I'mgonnagotalktomomforawhile.
ROSS:
Ok,doyouhaveanyideasforanyopeners?
RACHEL:
Uhh,let'sjuststayclearof'I'mtheguythat'sdoingyoudaughter'andyoushouldbeok.
[BackinMonica'sparty]
MONICA:
Okpeople,Iwantyoutotakeapieceofpaper,hereyougo,andwritedownyourmostembarassingmemory.Oh,andIdoaskthatwhenyou'renotusingthemarkers,youputthecapsbackonthembecausetheywilldryout.
[BackinChandlerandJoey'sparty]
ROSS:
HiDr.Greene.So,uh,how'severythingintheuh,vascularsurgery....game?
MR.GREENE:
It'snotagameRoss,awomandiedonmytabletoday.
ROSS:
I'msorry.Seethat'sthegoodthingaboutmyjob.Allthedinosaursonmytablearealreadydead.
[BackinMonica'sparty]
MONICA:
Listenyouguys,Idon'tmeantobeapainaboutthisbut,um,I'venoticedthatsomeofyouarejustplacingthemon.Youwannapushthecapsuntilyouhearthemclick.[shedemonstrates,
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