personal statement 留学文书写作培训教材.docx

1、personal statement 留学文书写作培训教材personal statement 留学文书写作培训教材by Dr. Marilyn Winkleby, Founder, SMYSP原文地址：http:/med.stanford.edu/school/smysp/nojava/prepare/writing.html 本文为斯坦福大学SMYSP项目对如何写作Essay的建议，具体详细阐述了应该注意的方方面面的咨询题 What is the purpose of your college essay? 目的：突出特色 Colleges may ask for a general es

2、say or give you specific questions to answer. The suggestions below apply to either. Each college has a team of trained readers, several of whom will usually read and score your essay independently. Readers are often professional staff from the college, but may also include faculty members, high sch

3、ool teachers, and counselors. These readers are not testing you on writing ability or English skills. They simply want to learn more about you on a personal level. However, a well-written essay will impress the reader so invest time in editing, and checking your grammar and spelling. What makes a go

4、od essay? 好文章什么样？体现你的生活经历，爱好，个性等。 Your essay should show the depth of your interests and accomplishments, and quality of your character. No matter what experiences you choose to write about, you should elaborate on the insights that you gained from the experiences and on the ways the experiences inf

5、luenced your life. Readers want to learn how experiences changed your attitudes or beliefs, influenced your academics or extracurricular activities, or clarified your educational goals. Below are some general suggestions as well as specific suggestions that may help you write an essay that makes you

6、 stand out as a great applicant. General suggestions: 1. Check the rules. 阅读写作要求，最常见的错误是忽略了要求和格式。 Read the instructions for the essay in the college application packet. One of the most common mistakes is to miss requirements about the length or formatting of the essay. Remember, almost all colleges

7、want you to send your essay with your completed application form. 2. Start early and revise often. 早动手，多修改。 You may want to begin by writing down many thoughts and then selecting the most important. Or, you may prefer to make an outline and expand it according to the length requirements. Be prepared

8、 to write at least 10 drafts and to have several people read drafts at different stages in your writing. These people should know you on a personal level. Once you have read and revised your essay several times, put it away for a week or so. (If you started early, you shouldnt be too close to the de

9、adline yet!) After the rest period, think again about what you want the admissions committee to know about you. Write this down, then take out your essay and read it again. Does it convey what you want to say? If not, you may have to start all over again or cut out large parts of your first draft. T

10、his is okay-writing requires flexibility, and sometimes you will have to eliminate things that you liked because they dont relate to your overall message. 3. Be clear and focused. 清晰，集中。应该是一个连贯的故事。 4. Be distinctive. 有特色的东西 Write an essay that distinguishes you from other applicants. Avoid writing s

11、entences that another applicant could write. Any applicant could write, I have always wanted to go to college to further my education, or I have always wanted to be a doctor. The following sentence is more personal and gives insight into an applicant抯 background: I first became interested in becomin

12、g a doctor when Daniel, my little brother, was hospitalized for an infected foot after he got caught on a barbed wire fence while being chased by a bull. 5. Be specific. 具体 This will help the reader remember you. Suppose you are writing about a patient you met during your volunteer work at an inner

13、city hospital. Rather than writing, One patient made a lasting impression on me, provide more details and write, A young Latina woman who had been burned in a car accident made a lasting impression on me and influenced my future career goals. Or, if you are writing about a teacher who was instrument

14、al in encouraging you to apply to college, you might write, Mr. Wright, my high school biology teacher, was the first to suggest that I might attend college. Avoid details that are superficial to your point, such as, Mr. Wright, my high school biology teacher, noticed my intense interest in science

15、during my sophomore year and took me aside one afternoon to talk with me. He was the first to suggest that I might attend college and encouraged me to take classes in biology, chemistry, physics, and other sciences. 6. Include powerful experiences. 专门的个人经历 Include personal experiences that will leav

16、e the reader with strong images, especially ones that have influenced your education or career goals. The experience can be told in several sentences, but it should paint a lasting image. These experiences may be related to a hardship you have overcome or an experience that influenced your life. Stu

17、dents have written about how living in foster care, caring for a parent with a serious illness, or living in a refugee camp contributed to their initiative and changed their attitudes about an issue or group of people. Other students have written about how seeing a young teenager die from AIDS or an

18、 elderly patient learn to speak after having a stroke inspired their commitment to pursuing a health career. 7. Be enthusiastic, but reasonable. 热情，合乎情理。 Show your enthusiasm, passion or commitment about causes, but be reasoned and logical in your discussions. You may feel strongly about a human rig

19、hts or health care issue, such as the need for guaranteed health care for all Americans. Discuss your personal views, provide supporting evidence, and propose how you would address the problem, but do so without preaching. 8. Be yourself! 写关于自己的东西 Most importantly, be honest and be yourself! Admissi

20、ons officers want to accept students who will be successful at their school and contribute to its environment. They want to recruit students from backgrounds who will diversify their student body and if you sound like their type of candidate, then it will be an advantageous situation for both you an

21、d the college! 9. Review your final version carefully. When you have completed the final version of your essay, read it carefully and ask: Is there a strong introduction that sets the stage for a memorable essay? 当写完了之后，应该看看是否有好的开头 Is the topic sentence of each paragraph clear and do the rest of the

22、 sentences每段第一句是否清晰the paragraph support the topic sentence? Are all of my thoughts connected in a logical fashion? 是否有逻辑 Is the essay focused and cohesive? 是否比较集中Does my unique voice come through; does the essay sound like me? Is the grammar correct? Have I done a final spell check on a computer? H

23、ave I re-read the final version carefully to be sure the spell check didn抰 substitute any incorrect words? As a final check, give your essay to an English teacher or someone with a background in grammar and spelling to make sure that you havent made any avoidable mistakes. And, be sure to keep a pri

24、nted copy of your final version. Specific suggestions about your essay: 具体建议 1. Academic preparation and scholarly experiences. You can use your essay to explain any academic challenges you have faced and why-and thus provide reasons for any low grades. You might mention how you had limited time to

25、focus on school because you were working to contribute to your familys income. Any example such as this should emphasize what you learned from the experience and how you intend to use this knowledge to help you succeed in college. You can also use your essay to explain any instances where you have s

26、ought educational opportunities. If your high school had a limited number of advanced college preparatory classes be sure to mention this. Because of this, perhaps you were motivated to do independent reading on your own or take classes at your local community college. This shows your initiative and

27、 your seriousness about your education. 2. Life experiences. 个人经历 Take time to reflect on your life, identifying some key aspects of your childhood and adolescence, as well as personal challenges you may have overcome. Some students are hesitant to share their personal experiences, but these are exa

28、ctly what the admissions committee wants to see. The readers are especially interested in your experiences because they reflect the unique aspects of your life. You might begin by describing obstacles or barriers that you experienced to higher education and then describe how these circumstances shap

29、ed your future decisions and strengthened your desire to attend college. If you are first in your family to attend college, be sure to mention this, since your path to college has been more challenging and different from a student whose parents are college educated. Relate your life experiences to y

30、our academic and career goals, as you weave your experiences together in your essay. For example, did a family hardship make you more resilient or more sensitive to others or lead to your interest in health? Perhaps caring for a young relative who had lung cancer made you aware of the dangers of smo

31、king and led you to write a science report about the promotion of cigarettes to youth. This contributed to your interest in health care policy and selection of a college that offers field experiences, such as those with health advocacy groups. 4. Character. Writing about your personal background giv

32、es you the chance to share aspects of your character that have helped you through difficult life experiences. The episodes you discuss should illustrate positive aspects of your character, such as determination, initiative, compassion, or leadership. Perhaps you suffer from a physical handicap. This has led to a compassion for those with chronic injuries that you pursued by volunteering at a rehabilitation hospital. This solidified your commitment to working with disabled people as part of your career. 5. Humanitarianism/caring exper