经典幽默英语故事30个1.docx

1、经典幽默英语故事30个1经典幽默英语故事(30个)-(1) 经典幽默英语故事（50个）要求：1、每天阅读两篇小故事，写出故事大意，尽量理解故事里的幽默点。2、在阅读故事的过程中，遇到不认识的单词，先不要查字典。阅读完小故事后，可以查一查文章里的词汇，并做一些笔记。3、开学后，请把这14页的阅读素材，装订成册，上交给各班的英语老师。老师会根据你的完成情况，给你的阅读作业打出分数。姓名：_ 班级：_ 学号：_ 成绩：_第一篇My First and My LastWhen George was thirty-five, he bought a small plane and learned tof

2、ly it. He soon became very good and made his plane do all kinds oftricks.George had a friend. His name was Mark. One day George offered to takeMark up in his plane. Mark thought, Ive travelled in a big planeseveral times, but Ive never been in a small one, so Ill go.They went up, and George flew aro

3、und for half an hour and did allkinds of tricks in the air.When they came down again, Mark was very glad to be back safely, andhe said to his friend in a shaking voice, Well, George, thank youvery much for those two trips in your plane.Gerogy was very surprised and said, Two trips?Yes, my first and

4、my last, answered Mark.故事大意：_第二篇First FlightMr. Johnson had never been up in an aerophane before and he had read a lot about air accidents, so one day when a friend offered to take him for a ride in his own small phane, Mr. Johnson was very worried about accepting. Finally, however, his friend persu

5、aded him that it was very safe, and Mr. Johnson boarded the plane.His friend started the engine and began to taxi onto the runway of the airport. Mr. Johnson had heard that the most dangerous part of a flight were the take-off and the landing, so he was extremely frightened and closed his eyes.After

6、 a minute or two he opened them again, looked out of the window of the plane, and said to his friend, Look at those people down there. They look as small as ants, dont they?Those are ants, answered his friend. Were still on the ground.故事大意：_第三篇A Nail Or A Fly?An old gentleman whose eyesight was fail

7、ing came to stay in a hotel room with a bottle of wine in each hand. On the wall there was a fly which he took for a nail. So the moment he hung them on, the bottles fell broken and the wine spilt all over the floor. When a waitress discovered what had happened, she showed deep sympathy for him and

8、decided to do him a favour.So the next morning when he was out taking a walk in the roof garden, she hammered a nail exactly where the fly had stayed.Now the old man entered his room. The smell of the spilt wine reminded him of the accident. When he looked up at the wall, he found the fly was there

9、again! He walked to it carefully adn slapped it with all his strength. On hearing a loud cry, the kind-hearted waitress rushed in. To her great surprise, the poor old man was there sitting on the floor, his teeth clenched and his right hand bleeding!故事大意：_第四篇Ill See to the RestA guard was about to s

10、ignal his train to start when he saw an attractive girl standing on the platform by an open door, talking to another pretty girl inside the carriage.Come on, miss! he shouted. Shut the door, please!Oh, I just want to kiss my sister goodbye, she called back.You just shut that door, please, called the

11、 guard, and Ill see to the rest.故事大意：_第五篇Chaude and ColdA patron in Montreal cafe turned on a tap in the washroom and got scalded. This is an outrage, he complained. The faucet marked C gave me boiling water.But, Monsieur, C stands for chaude - French for hot. You should know that if you live in Mon

12、treal.Wait a minute, roared the patron. The other tap is also marked C.Of course, said the manager, It stands for cold. After all, Montreal is a bilingual city.故事大意：_第六篇A Soldiers Brilliant IdeaMr. Robinson had to travel somewhere on business, and as he was in a hurry, he decided to go by air. He li

13、ked sitting beside a window when he was flying, so when he got on to the plane, he looked for a window seat. He found all of them had already had been taken except for one. There was a soldier sitting in the seat beside this one, and Mr. Robinson was surprised that he had not taken the one by the wi

14、ndow; but, anyhow, he at once went towards it.When he reached it, however, he saw that there was a notice on it. It was written in ink and said, This seat is preserved for proper load balance, thank you. Mr Robinson had never seen such an unusual notice in a plane before, but he thought that the pla

15、ne must be carrying something particularly heavy in it, so he walked on and found another empty seat, not beside a window, to sit in.Two or three people tried to sit in the window seat beside the soldier, but they too read the notice and went on, when the plane was nearly full, a very beautiful girl

16、 hurried into the plane. The soldier, who was watching the passengers coming in, quickly took the notice off the seat beside himself and in this way succeededin having the company of the girl during the whole trip.故事大意：_第七篇New DiscoveryA hillbilly was visiting the big city for the first time. Enteri

17、ng an office building, he saw a pudgy older woman step into a small room. The doors closed, lights flashed, and after a while the door slid open and a beautiful young model stepped off the elevator.Blinking in amazement, the hillbilly drawled, I should have brought my wife!故事大意：_第八篇A Bad ImpressionS

18、ix people were travelling in a compartment on a train. Five of them were quiet and well behaved, but the sixth was a rude young man who was causing a lot of trouble to the other passengers.At last this young man got out at a station with his two heavy bags. None of the other passengers helped him, b

19、ut one of them waited until the rude young man was very far away and then opened the window and shouted to him, You left something behind in the compartment! Then he closed the window again.The young man truned around and hurried back with his two bags. He was very tired when he arrived, but he shou

20、ted through the window, What did I leave behind?As the train began to move again, the passenger who had called him back opened the window and said, A very bad impression!故事大意：_第九篇Sleeping PillsBob was having trouble getting to sleep at night. He went to see his doctor, who prescribed some extra-stro

21、ng sleeping pills.Sunday night Bob took the pills, slept well and was awake before he heard the alarm. He took his time getting to the office, strolled in and said to his boss: I didnt have a bit of trouble getting up this morning.Thats fine, roared the boss, but where were you Monday and Tuesday?故事

22、大意：_第十篇CreativeApplying for my first job, I realized I had to be creative in listing my few qualifications. Asked about additional schooling and training, I answered truthfully that I had spent three years in computer programming classes. I got the job.I had neglected to mention that I took the same course for three years before I passed.故事大意：_