1、s in town for a week. You mean shes like a door-to-door salesman? If you were doing it, Theyd call it a dork-to-dork salesman. Ohh! My boy strikes like a rattlesnake! Oh, yeah? Well. well, you. Wow. All right, well, we can see the movie tomorrow. Come on. Its time for your lesson. You mean her secon
2、d lesson, because she just got schooled. Whats wrong with me today? Shake it off, champ. Its not your day.Manny : Hey.Gloria : Ay. Good morning, papi. Is it? Aw, youre still sad because of that audition. That part was mine. I was born to play Tevye. Instead they give it to Rod Jackson? What does he
3、know from suffering?Jay : How we doing? A little better, But were gonna go and throw ice cream at the problem. Well, if that doesnt work, this should do the trick. what doesnt kill us makes us stronger. We can hang this in your room. You can see it every morning, start to internalize it. Pretty soon
4、, nothing will keep you down. But its not true. What are you talking about? Lots of stuff that doesnt kill you makes you weaker. My friends grandfather had a heart attack. Now he needs a machine to breathe. Ive seen him at the supermarket. Now he needs to drive one of those little, like. Yeah, thats
5、 right. Be negative. Its just not a good poster, Jay. Youre only making me stronger.OPENING CREDITSMitchell : Did you pack the, uh, bread for the ducks?Cameron : Yes. Not the whole-wheat kind. The ducks dont like that. Theyre ducks, Mitchell. They dont care. We both believe that animals Should play
6、a big part in Lilys life. Having grown up on a farm, I was surrounded by them. They were more like brothers and sisters than just, you know, livestock. Delicious brothers and sisters. Life on a farm. they know what theyre getting into. Eesh. Wait. Oh, its the office.t answer it. I have to.s like thi
7、s every Saturday. Just ignore it. Well, maybe its not that this time. Hello? Yeah. Thats nice. Holy. Shel? You all right, buddy? Oh, theres four of them, Mitchell!re giving her little duck kisses, and she. oh, shes laughing! I cant believe youre missing this. Well, why not, Cam?ve missed everything
8、else. She rolled over when I was in Phoenix. She started scooting en I was in court. Well, just tell them youre not coming in. You do enough for them. Well, you know that, I know that, you know? The only one who doesnt know that is my sucky boss. Hes the suckiest suck of all time. Hes a miserable so
9、n of a bitch who. May have heard everything I just said. Hi honey! When are you getting together with your gal pal? Actually, I was just checking on that. Shes supposed to send me a message. Ohh. Youre Facebook friends. Sure am. Oh. Shes one of my 447 friends. Everybody wants a slice. How long have
10、you two been in touch with each other? Uh, she tracked me down about a year ago. Mm. Mm, mm. What?s. whats that sound? Mm. Nothing. Oh. There she is right now. how about we meet at Le Reve at 7:30? Well, that sounds innocent enough. I mean, drinks with an ex-girlfriend at an intimate French restaura
11、nt. Honey, youre doing that thing where you say what I want you to say but your tone seems mean. Let me guess. Denise isnt married. Recently divorced. Whats the big deal? Come on, Phil. You cant be that naive. Seriously, women in their 30s on the internet are like. Theyre like ninjas. They get in th
12、eir little black outfits and try and sneak their way into your marriage.s not Denise. Mm. Here, read some of her messages. Youre gonna feel silly. Go ahead.hey, Phil. Hows it goin? You cant add the sexy voice. hi, Phil. Hows it going?so glad to hear your neck is better Are you seriously jealous? No!
13、 I am not jealous at all. I just happen to know women better than you do, and that woman wants a slice. Okay, just to prove how wrong you are, Im gonna invite her over here for drinks. Fine with me. Just hope its fine with Denise. gee, Phil. I really had my heart set on Le Reve. That voice doesnt bo
14、ther me. Kind of like it! Well, has he been acting weird around you? No, no. Ive been avoiding him all morning. So you dont even know if he heard you. Well, thats why were doing this. Hey, where are you? I only have a half-hour for lunch. Hello, handsome. Okay, so, uh, this is where it happened. Jus
15、t, um, turn off the phone, roll down the window, and well well see if you can hear me. Okay. Go around! Were re-creating a faux pas! Thank you! Okay. C-can you hear me now? Uh, yeah, but just barely. Is this how loud you were talking? Uh, well, it might have been a little bit louder. There was traff
16、ic. I mean, I almost had to shout. You almost had to what? Shout. Little bit louder now. Shout! * hey, hey, hey, hey * Really, Cam? My job is at stake here and Oh, w-who are we kidding? You can obviously hear me. I am so screwed. Manny? Manny, come here a second, pal. Huh? I got some bad news, buddy
17、. What is it? Well, theres no easy way to say this. Shel Turtlestein is dead. How? I was down here reading the paper, And I heard this commotion up in your room, so. So naturally I go running up there. And this mangy raccoon had busted through your screen. He must have scampered up to where Shel was
18、. By the time I walked in, he had him. The little bastard had him by the neck, shaking him. Gravels flying everywhere. He didnt even flinch. He just stared at me with that smug look and then bolted. If only Id have got here earlier. May I see the body? Baby, are you sure thats a good idea?s somethin
19、g I have to do. Thats him. Sorry, pal. It just doesnt make any sense. Yep. Only the good die young. But in school we lead raccoons are nocturnal. They sleep during the day. They sure do, and this one mustve got up for a midnight snack. You know, weve all done that. I guess so. Yeah. It all adds up.
20、I dont think I can be in here right now. Too many memories. Hell be okay. You lie.m Colombian. I know a fake crime scene when I see one! I was hanging up the new poster. And it fell on top of him. It was an accident. You have to tell him. No. Ive been through this before. When Mitchell was 9, I was
21、supposed to take care of his bird. It got out and flew into a fan. It was like a bloody pillow fight. My god. How many pets have you killed? Just the two. I took the heat on the bird. It was a big mistake. To this day, Mitchell looks at me, I see him thinking, thats the guy who killed Fly-Za Minnell
22、i. And what if he finds out? Then what?ll be the guy that killed his pet and lied to him.s not gonna find out, because I covered my tracks. Okay. Fly-za Minnelli? How did I not know that kid was gay? Hey, Luke! Big day for you, huh? Why? Because you get to meet your real mom. We all made a pact wed
23、deny it until you turned 21, But thats the real reason dads old girlfriend is coming over. Shes your mom, and if she likes you, youll go live with her.m not adopted. Im asking mom. You mean Mrs. Dunphy? Shes not going to tell you the truth. I-I-Im not. I know. Unh! Just cause he called you a dork-to
24、-dork salesman? The empire strikes back. Raccoons have five toes.s that?t mean to bother you. Its just confusing. The footprints in my room only have four toes. You know, I bet I know wt happened. Ill bet he lost those toes in a fight. And that guy looked like hed been in a brawl or two. One toe fro
25、m each foot? Maybe. Y-you know, Manny, I think the only thing thats gonna get you to stop asking all these questions. is for you to have a little closure. What do you mean? Well, Id like to throw a little memorial for Shel. Itll be good for all of us. That way, we get our grief out, and then we never have to talk about this ever. ever again. Hi! Oh, careful, theres a thing. Ooh. Thats a. good to see you.Den
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