Augustus Does His Bit.docx

1、Augustus Does His BitAugustus Does His Bit by George Bernard Shaw I wish to express my gratitude for certain good offices which Augustus secured for me in January,1917. I had been invited to visit the theatre of war in Flanders by the Commander-in-Chief:an invitation which was, under the circumstanc

2、es, a summons to duty. Thus I had occasion to spend some days in procuring the necessary passport and other official facilities for my journey. It happened just then that the Stage Society gave a performance of this little play. It opened the heart of every official to me. I have always been treated

3、 with distinguished consideration in my contracts with bureaucracy during the war;but on this occasion I found myself persona grata in the highest degree. There was only one word when the formalities were disposed of; and that was We are up against Augustus all day.The showing-up of Augustus scandal

4、ized one or two innocent and patriotic critics who regarded the prowess of the British army as inextricably bound up with Highcastle prestige. But our Government departments knew better: their problem was how to win the war with Augustus on their backs, well-meaning, brave, patriotic, but obstructiv

5、ely fussy, self-important, imbecile, and disastrous.Save for the satisfaction of being able to laugh at Augustus in the theatre, nothing, as far as I know, came of my dramatic reduction of him to absurdity. Generals, admirals, Prime Ministers and Controllers, not to mention Emperors, Kaisers and Tsa

6、rs, were scrapped remorselessly at home and abroad, for their sins or services, as the case might be. But Augustus stood like the Eddystone in a storm, and stands so to this day. He gave us his word that he was indispensable and we took it.Augustus Does His Bit was performed for the first time at th

7、e Court Theatre in London by the Stage Society on the 21st January, 1917, with Lalla Vandervelde as The Lady, F.B.J. Sharp as Lord Augustus Highcastle, and Charles Rock as Horatio Floyd Beamish.AUGUSTUS DOES HIS BITThe Mayors parlor in the Town Hall of Little Pifflington. Lord Augustus Highcastle, a

8、 distinguished member of the governing class, in the uniform of a colonel, and very well preserved at forty-five, is comfortably seated at a writing-table with his heels on it, reading The Morning Post. The door faces him, a little to his left, at the other side of the room. The window is behind him

9、. In the fireplace, a gas stove. On the table a bell button and a telephone. Portraits of past Mayors, in robes and gold chains, adorn the walls. An elderly clerk with a short white beard and whiskers, and a very red nose, shuffles in.AUGUSTUS hastily putting aside his paper and replacing his feet o

10、n the floor. Hullo! Who are you?THE CLERK. The staff a slight impediment in his speech adds to the impression of incompetence produced by his age and appearance.AUGUSTUS. You the staff! What do you mean, man?THE CLERK. What I say. There aint anybody else.AUGUSTUS. Tush! Where are the others?THE CLER

11、K. At the front.AUGUSTUS. Quite right. Most proper. Why arent you at the front?THE CLERK. Over age. Fifty-seven.AUGUSTUS. But you can still do your bit. Many an older man is in the G.R.s, or volunteering for home defence.THE CLERK. I have volunteered.AUGUSTUS. Then why are you not in uniform?THE CLE

12、RK. They said they wouldnt have me if I was given away with a pound of tea. Told me to go home and not be an old silly.A sense of unbearable wrong, till now only smouldering in him, bursts into flame. Young Bill Knight, that I took with me, got two and sevenpence. I got nothing. Is it justice? This

13、country is going to the dogs, if you ask me.AUGUSTUS rising indignantly. I do not ask you, sir; and I will not allow you to say such things in my presence. Our statesmen are the greatest known to history. Our generals are invincible.Our army is the admiration of the world. Furiously. How dare you te

14、ll me that the country is going to the dogs!THE CLERK. Why did they give young Bill Knight two and sevenpence, and not give me even my tram fare? Do you call that being great statesmen? As good as robbing me, I call it.AUGUSTUS. Thats enough. Leave the room. He sits down and takes up his pen, settli

15、ng himself to work. The clerk shuffles to the door. Augustus adds, with cold politeness Send me the Secretary.THE CLERK. IM the Secretary. I cant leave the room and send myself to you at the same time, can I?AUGUSTUS, Dont be insolent. Where is the gentleman I have been corresponding with: Mr Horati

16、o Floyd Beamish?THE CLERK returning and bowing. Here. Me.AUGUSTUS. You! Ridiculous. What right have you to call yourself by a pretentious name of that sort?THE CLERK. You may drop the Horatio Floyd. Beamish is good enough for me.AUGUSTUS. Is there nobody else to take my instructions?THE CLERK. Its me or nobody. And for two pins Id chuck it.Dont you drive me too far. Old uns like me is up in the world