TED2013演讲稿 Meg Jay[Why 30 is not the new 20][20岁,不可挥霍的光阴]Word下载.docx

1、With the funny stories that Alex would bring to session, it was easy for me just to nod my head while we kicked the can down the road. n30s the new 20, Alex would say, and as far as I could tell, she was right. Work happened later, marriage happened later, kids happened later, even death happened la

2、ter. Twentysomethings like Alex and I had nothing but time. But before long, my supervisor pushed me to push Alex about her love life. I pushed back. I said, Sure, shes dating down, shes sleeping with a knucklehead, but ifs not like shes gonna to many the guy. And then my supervisor said, Not yet, b

3、ut she might marry the next one. Besides, the best time to work on Alexs marriage is before she has one.Thats what psychologists call an Aha! moment. That was the moment I realized, 30 is not the new 20. Yes, people settle down later than they used to, but that didnt make Alexs twenties a developmen

4、tal downtime. That made Alexs twenties a developmental sweet spot, and we were sitting there blowing it. That was when I realized that this sort of benign neglect was a real problem, and it had real consequences, not just for Alex and her love life, but for the careers and the families and the futur

5、es of twentysomethings everywhere.There are 50 million twentysomethings in the United States right now. Were talking about 15 percent of the population, or 100 percent if you consider that no ones getting through adulthood without going through their twenties first.Raise your hand if you are in your

6、 twenties. I really want to see some twentysomethings here. Oh, yay! Yalls awesome. If you work with twentysomethings, you love a twentysomething, youre losing sleep over twentysomethings, I want to see. Okay. Awesome. Twentysomethings really matter.So I specialize in twentysomethings because I beli

7、eve that every single one of those 50 million twentysomethings deserves to know what psychologists, sociologists, neurologists and fertility specialists already know: that daiming your twenties is one of the simplest, yet most transformative things you can do for work, for love, for your happiness,

8、maybe even for flie world. This is not my opinion. These are the facts. We know the 80 percent of lifes most defining moments take place by age 35. That means that eight out of 10 of the decisions and experiences and moments that make your life what it is will have happened by your mid-thirties. Peo

9、ple who are over 40, dont panic. This crowd is gonna be fine, I think. We know that the first 10 years of a career has an exponential impact on how much money you are going to earn. We know that more than half of Americans are married or are living with or dating their future partner by 30. We know

10、that the brain caps off its second and last growth spurt in your twenties, as it rewires itself for adulthood, which means that whatever it is you want to change about yourself, now is the time to change it.We know that personality changes more during your twenties than at any other time in life, an

11、d we know that female fertility peaks at age 28, and things get tricky after age 35. So your twenties are the time to educate yourself about your body and your options. So when we think about child development, we all know that the first five years are a critical period for language and attachment i

12、n the brain. Its a time when your ordinary, day-to-day life has an inordinate impact on who you will become. But what we hear less about is that theres such a thing as adult development, and our twenties are that critical period of adult development.But this isnt what twentysomethings are hearing. N

13、ewspapers talk about the changing timetable of adulthood. Researchers call the twenties am extended adolescence. Journalists coin silly nicknames for twentysomethings like twixters and kidults. Its true. As a culture, we have trivialized what is actually the defining decade of adulthood.Leonard Bern

14、stein said that to achieve great things, you need a plan and not quite enough time. Isnt that true? So what do you think happens when you pat a twentysomething on the head and you say, You have 10 extra years to start your life? Nothing happens. You have robbed that person of his urgency and ambition, and absolutely nothing happens. And then, every day, smart, interesting twentysomethings like you or like your sons and daughters com