TED2013演讲稿 Meg Jay[Why 30 is not the new 20][20岁,不可挥霍的光阴]Word下载.docx

TED2013演讲稿 Meg Jay[Why 30 is not the new 20][20岁,不可挥霍的光阴]Word下载.docx

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WiththefunnystoriesthatAlexwouldbringtosession,itwaseasyformejusttonodmyheadwhilewekickedthecandowntheroad.n30'

sthenew20,"

Alexwouldsay,andasfarasIcouldtell,shewasright.Workhappenedlater,marriagehappenedlater,kidshappenedlater,evendeathhappenedlater.TwentysomethingslikeAlexandIhadnothingbuttime.Butbeforelong,mysupervisorpushedmetopushAlexaboutherlovelife.Ipushedback.Isaid,"

Sure,she'

sdatingdown,she'

ssleepingwithaknucklehead,butifsnotlikeshe'

sgonnatomanytheguy."

Andthenmysupervisorsaid,"

Notyet,butshemightmarrythenextone.Besides,thebesttimetoworkonAlex'

smarriageisbeforeshehasone."

That'

swhatpsychologistscallan"

Aha!

"

moment.ThatwasthemomentIrealized,30isnotthenew20.Yes,peoplesettledownlaterthantheyusedto,butthatdidn'

tmakeAlex'

stwentiesadevelopmentaldowntime.ThatmadeAlex'

stwentiesadevelopmentalsweetspot,andweweresittingthereblowingit.ThatwaswhenIrealizedthatthissortofbenignneglectwasarealproblem,andithadrealconsequences,notjustforAlexandherlovelife,butforthecareersandthefamiliesandthefuturesoftwentysomethingseverywhere.

Thereare50milliontwentysomethingsintheUnitedStatesrightnow.We'

retalkingabout15percentofthepopulation,or100percentifyouconsiderthatnoone'

sgettingthroughadulthoodwithoutgoingthroughtheirtwentiesfirst.

Raiseyourhandifyouareinyourtwenties.Ireallywanttoseesometwentysomethingshere.Oh,yay!

Y'

all'

sawesome.Ifyouworkwithtwentysomethings,youloveatwentysomething,you'

relosingsleepovertwentysomethings,Iwanttosee.Okay.Awesome.Twentysomethingsreallymatter.

SoIspecializeintwentysomethingsbecauseIbelievethateverysingleoneofthose50milliontwentysomethingsdeservestoknowwhatpsychologists,sociologists,neurologistsandfertilityspecialistsalreadyknow:

thatdaimingyourtwentiesisoneofthesimplest,yetmosttransformativethingsyoucandoforwork,forlove,foryourhappiness,maybeevenforflieworld.Thisisnotmyopinion.Thesearethefacts.Weknowthe80percentoflife'

smostdefiningmomentstakeplacebyage35.Thatmeansthateightoutof10ofthedecisionsandexperiencesand"

momentsthatmakeyourlifewhatitiswillhavehappenedbyyourmid-thirties.Peoplewhoareover40,don'

tpanic.Thiscrowdisgonnabefine,Ithink.Weknowthatthefirst10yearsofacareerhasanexponentialimpactonhowmuchmoneyyouaregoingtoearn.WeknowthatmorethanhalfofAmericansaremarriedorarelivingwithordatingtheirfuturepartnerby30.Weknowthatthebraincapsoffitssecondandlastgrowthspurtinyourtwenties,asitrewiresitselfforadulthood,whichmeansthatwhateveritisyouwanttochangeaboutyourself,nowisthetimetochangeit.

Weknowthatpersonalitychangesmoreduringyourtwentiesthanatanyothertimeinlife,andweknowthatfemalefertilitypeaksatage28,andthingsgettrickyafterage35.Soyourtwentiesarethetimetoeducateyourselfaboutyourbodyandyouroptions.Sowhenwethinkaboutchilddevelopment,weallknowthatthefirstfiveyearsareacriticalperiodforlanguageandattachmentinthebrain.It'

satimewhenyourordinary,day-to-daylifehasaninordinateimpactonwhoyouwillbecome.Butwhatwehearlessaboutisthatthere'

ssuchathingasadultdevelopment,andourtwentiesarethatcriticalperiodofadultdevelopment.

Butthisisn'

twhattwentysomethingsarehearing.Newspaperstalkaboutthechangingtimetableofadulthood.Researcherscallthetwentiesamextendedadolescence.Journalistscoinsillynicknamesfortwentysomethingslike"

twixters"

and"

kidults"

.It'

strue.Asaculture,wehavetrivializedwhatisactuallythedefiningdecadeofadulthood.

LeonardBernsteinsaidthattoachievegreatthings,youneedaplanandnotquiteenoughtime.Isn'

tthattrue?

Sowhatdoyouthinkhappenswhenyoupatatwentysomethingontheheadandyousay,"

Youhave10extrayearstostartyourlife?

Nothinghappens.Youhaverobbedthatpersonofhisurgencyandambition,andabsolutelynothinghappens.Andthen,everyday,smart,interestingtwentysomethingslikeyouorlikeyoursonsanddaughterscom