实用英语写作英文revise实例40句文档格式.docx

实用英语写作英文revise实例40句文档格式.docx

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novel'

isanothervalue-judgmentwordthatisinappropriateinascientificreport.

Novel是新颖,奇异之意,我们许多作者喜欢用这个词,但这个英国学者认为在科学报告中不宜用它.

1.原文

AndthestrengtheningmechanismwasalsorevealedbyusingX-raydiffractionandelectronspectroscopyanalysis.

AndthestrengtheningmechanismwasrevealedbyusingX-raydiffractionandelectronspectroscopyanalysis.

And'

and'

also'

arebothredundant.（不要同时用”and’和‘also”）

2.原文

Currently,therearetwotypesofceramiccores:

i.e.,fusedsilica-basedandalumina-basedcores,bothhavebeenusedforcastinghollowturbineblades.Thehigh-temperaturepropertiesoffusedsilica-basedceramiccoresareobtainedbycontrollingtheprecipitatedamountofcristobalite（方英石）intherangeofabout8~16%.

Atpresent,therearetwotypesofceramiccores:

fusedsilica-basedandalumina-basedcores,bothofwhichhavebeenusedforfabricatinghollowturbineblades.Thehigh-temperaturepropertiesoffusedsilica-basedceramiccoresareobtainedbycontrollingtheamountofprecipitatedcristobaliteintherangeofabout8~16%.

（1）'

i.e.'

isredundant.“i.e.”重复多余

（2）Both改为bothofwhich

（3）theprecipitatedamountofcristobalite改为theamountofprecipitatedcristobalite

3.原文

Torapidlyobtainsufficientroom-temperatureflexuralstrengthatrelativelowsinteringtemperature,mineralizersareaddedduringslippreparationtoformlowmeltingpointphases,however,whichmayimpairthehigh-temperaturepropertiestosomedegree.

Toobtainsufficientroom-temperatureflexuralstrengthatrelativelowsinteringtemperature,mineralizersareaddedduringslippreparationtoformlowmeltingpointphases.Thesemayimpairthehigh-temperaturepropertiestosomedegree.

rapidly'

isredundant（sincetherateofdensificationisnotreported）.文章没有提到密实化的速度,故用”rapidly”多余.

（2）.These（指矿化剂mineralizer）mayimpair'

（which不清楚何所指?

）

4.原文：

Highqualityceramicmouldisthebasisofinvestment-casthollowturbinebladeofaeroengines.

Highqualityceramicmoldisthebasisofinvestment-casthollowturbinebladeforaeroengines.

用for意思更清楚!

5.原文：

Inthetraditionalmanufacturingprocessofceramicmould,assemblyerrorsoccurduringtheprocessofassemblingceramiccorestowaxpatterndie.

Inthetraditionalmanufacturingprocessofceramicmolds,assemblyerrorsoftenoccurintheprocessofassemblingceramiccorestowax-patterndie.

during强调时间过程,in强调事件过程.很多人搞不清!

6.原文：

Becauseoftheinjectionforceintheprocessofwaxinjectionandtheimpactforcecausedbymoltenmetalduringcasting,unconnectedceramiccoremayleaveoriginalposition.

Becauseoftheinjectionforceintheprocessofwaxmakingandtheimpactforcecausedbymoltenmetalincastingprocess,unfixed（未固定）ceramiccoresmaydeviatefrom（偏离）originalposition.

7.原文：

Limitedbytheformingabilityofpressurecastingandthestructuralcomplexityofmetalmold,ceramiccore（应该用复数,因为是泛指）withcrossingstructureinspace（含意不清）canhardlybemanufacturedonceorintegrally,whileitcanonlybemanufacturedbyassemblingseveralsimplecorestogether.

Limitedbytheformingabilityofinjectingmolding（注模成型）andthestructuralcomplexityofhardtooling（硬模具）,ceramiccoreswithintricatestructure（复杂精细结构）canhardlybemanufacturedintegrally（一体化,整体地）,whiletheycanonlybemanufacturedbyassemblingseveralsimplecorestogether.

8.原文：

Duringnearnetshapeinvestmentcastingofhollowturbineblades,oneofthemainfactsofcausingcoreshiftandperforationdefectsisthespecialpositioningerrorbetweencoresandthatbetweencoreandshell.

Innearnetshapeinvestmentcastingofhollowturbineblades,coreshift（偏芯）defectsoftenoccurduetothepositionerrorsbetweencoresandthatbetweencoresandshell,andthequalifiedrateofhollowturbinebladesislow.（原稿中的during应改为in,另外红色部分描述不清楚!

9.原文：

Withtheimprovementofenginecomprehensiveperformance,internalcoolingchannelsofhollowturbinebladearebecomingmorecomplex,andwallthicknessofhollowturbinebladeisbecomingthinner,whichbecomesanewchallengeforthemanufacturingtechnologyofinvestmentcasting.

Withtheimprovementofenginecomprehensiveperformance,internalcoolingchannelsofhollowturbinebladesarebecomingmorecomplex,andthewallthicknessofthebladesisbecomingthinner,whichbringsanewchallengetoinvestmentcasting.

不是”变成”挑战而是带来挑战,向…提出挑战.blade泛指时用复数形式blades

10.原文：

Theceramiccoreandshellareconnectedtogetherintheformingprocessbyusingmanufacturingtechniqueofintegratedceramiccoreandshell,insteadofthetraditionalmanufacturingtechniqueofassemblingtheceramiccoretoshell,sothatpositionaccuracybetweencoresandthatbetweencoreandshellcanbeensuredandthequalifiedrateofprecisioninvestmentcastingsofhollowturbinebladecanbeincreased.

Ifceramiccoresandshellareconnectedtogetherintheformingprocessofintegralceramicmold,insteadoftraditionalcastingprocessofassemblingceramiccoresintoshell,thepositionaccuracybetweencoresandthatbetweencoresandshellwillbeensuredandthequalifiedratewillbeincreased.（原稿描述累赘罗嗦,表达不清晰!

11.原文：

Rapidprototyping（RPforshort）technologyandgelcastingtechnologyprovidetechnologicalconditionsforpreparationofintegratedceramiccoreandshell.

Rapidprototyping（RP）technologyandgelcastingprocessprovidetechnicalconditionsforthepreparationofintegralceramicmolds.（凝胶注模技术不如凝胶注模工艺确切!

具体的技术要用technical不能用technological,一体化,整体式不是integrated而是integral,integrated是集成的）

12.原文：

Rapidprototypingtechnologyissimilartoinvestmentcastingonmanufactureofcomplexpartsormodel.ThedirectlyapplicationofrapidprototypingtechnologyisreplacingwaxmodelwithRPprototyping.TherearevariousRPprototypingthatcanbeusedtoreplacethewaxpatterninvestmentcasting,suchassaltmodels,resinmodels,polystyrenemodels,starchmodels,andpapermodelsetc.Sothatthereisnoneedtomanufacturewaxpatterndie.

TherearevariousRPpartsthatcanbeusedtoreplacewaxpatterns,suchassaltmodels,resinmodels,polystyrenemodels,starchmodels,andpapermodelsetc.Sothatthereisnoneedtomanufacturewax-patterndies.（原稿冗长,术语译法有错,腊模的”模”指母模pattern,而不是模具mold.

13.原文：

UsingSLtechnologytoprepareresinmouldovercomethedisadvantagesofhighcostandlongcycleduringdesigningandmanufacturingcomplexmolds.

UtilizingSLtechnologytoprepareresinpatterncanovercomethedisadvantagesofhighcostandlongcycleindesigningandmanufacturingcomplexmolds.（这里的树脂模是母模pattern而不是模具mold.During应用在时间过程中而不是事件过程.

14.原文：

Gelcastingisanadvancedandnear-net-shapeformingtechnologyforgreenceramic,followingthedevelopmentofslipcastingandinjectionmoulding.

Gelcastingisanadvancedandnear-net-shapeformingprocess,followingthedevelopmentofslipcasting（灌浆成型）andinjectionmolding.（注模成型）（又把technology技术和process工艺用混了!

15.原文：

Ceramicslurryusingdeionizedwaterasitssolventhasgoodfluidity,sothatitcanfillupthecomplexmouldcavitywithoutanypressure.

Ceramicslurryusingdeionizedwaterassolvent（原句的its多余）hasgoodfluidity,anditcanfillupthecomplexmoldcavitywithoutadditionalpressure（另外施加压力）.

16.原文：

Theformingabilityisonlylimitedbythecomplexdegreeofthemouldcavityratherthanmouldmaterial,sothatso（多余!

）manykindsofmaterialsuchaswaxmold,plasticmold,resinmold,metalmold,etc,canbeused.

Theformingabilityisonlylimitedbythecomplexdegreeofthemoldcavityratherthanmoldmaterial,manykindsofmaterialssuchaswax,plastics,resin,metal,etc,canbeused.（原句中有一个逻辑错误,将material材料和mold模具等同,修改后的句子将mold去掉了）

’’

17.原文：

Comparedwiththatofinjectionmoulding,greenbodiesofgelcastinghaveadvantagesofhigherstrength,betteruniformity,lowerorganiccontent,easiertodegrease,andnodefectssuchaswarpage,cracking,etc.

Comparedwithinjectionmolding,gelcastinggreenbodieshaveadvantagesofhigherstrength,betteruniformity,lowerorganiccontent,easinessofdegreasing,andnodefectssuchaswarpage,cracking,etc.occur.（that何所指?

不清楚.技术术语中主词的定语能不用of结构就尽量不用,溶胶注模的生坯直接译成gelcastinggreenbody更紧凑!

并列词组要用同样词性,easiertodegrease就和其它并列成分不协调,因为其它都是名词形式,故用easinessof…注意,这正是许多人在描述某个特性“容易…”时往往不会表达的地方）

18.原文：

ThepapercombinesgelcastingtechnologywithSLtechnology,presentinganewmethodofmanufacturingintegratedceramiccoreandshell.

ThepapercombinesgelcastingprocesswithSLtechnologyandpresentsanewmethodofmanufacturingintegralceramicmold.（gelcasting是一种具体的工艺不是泛指的技术不能用technology.integrated是集成而integral才是一体化的,整体式的.

19.原文：

Themethodmainlyincludes:

（1）manufacturingresinmoldofhollowturbinebladebyusingSLtechnology,

（2）completingintegratedceramiccoreandshellbyusinggel-castingtechnology,（3）fillinginternalcoolantchannelofhollowturbinebladeanddiecavitysoastoconnectingcoresandshellsfirmlybyceramicslurry,aimingatprovidingceramicmoldofhighqualityforhollowturbineblade.