疯狂学校11missdaisyis.docx

1、疯狂学校11missdaisyis Miss Daisy is crazy1I hate school我讨厌学校“My name is . I like football and video games, and I hate school.” Our teacher, Miss Daisy, was taking attendance. It was the first day of second grade. Miss Daisy told everyone in the class to stand up, say our name, and say something about ou

2、rself.“我的名字叫。我喜爱踢橄榄球、玩电子游戏，就是厌恶学校。”咱们的教师黛西小姐在听着。明天是二年级开学第一天。黛西小姐叫班里每个人站起来，说出自己的名字，讲点关于自己的事情。All the kids laughed when I said I hated school. But there was nothing funny about it. I have learned a lot in my eight years. One thing I learned is that there is no reason why kids should have to go to scho

3、ol.我一说我厌恶学校，同学们都笑了。其实我说的话没什么好笑的。我今年八岁，已经懂得很多事情。我懂得的事情当中，有一件就是孩子上学一点理由也没有。If you ask me, kids can learn all we need to learn by watching TV. You can learn important information like which breakfast cereal tastes best and what toys you should buy and which shampoo leaves your hair the shiniest. This i

4、s stuff that well need to know when we grow up.假如你问我，我会说，咱们孩子要懂得通过电视就能够全部学到。你能够学习种种重要的信息，例如早餐麦片哪一个牌子的味道最好，买玩具该买什么，哪一种洗发水让你洗完头头发最顺滑光亮，等等。这些才是咱们成长中必须懂得的。School is just this dumb thing that grown-ups thought up so they wouldnt have to pay for baby-sitters. When I grow up and have children of my own, I

5、wont make them go to school. They can just ride their bikes and play football and video games all day. Theyll be happy, and theyll think Im the greatest father in the world.什么学校！学校是小孩儿想进去的傻玩意儿。这样，他们就能够免得花钱请保姆。等我长大有了自己的孩子后，我肯定不让他们去上学。他们能够终日纵情骑自行车、踢橄榄球、玩电子游戏。他们将会快快乐乐，并且觉得我是天下最好的老爸。But for now, I wante

6、d to let my new teacher, Miss Daisy, know from the very start how I felt about school.可现在，我要让我的新教师黛西小姐从一开始就知道，我对学校到底是什么看法。“You know what, .” Miss Daisy said, “I hate school too.”“你晓得吗，阿仔”戴西小姐说，“我也厌恶学校。”“You do”“你也厌恶”We all stared at Miss Daisy. I thought teachers loved school. If they didnt love sch

7、ool, why did they become teachers咱们全都盯住戴西小姐看。我本认为教师都是爱学校的。如果他们不爱学校，干吗要当教师呢 Why would they ever want to go to a school as a grown-up I know that when Im a grown-up, Im not going to go any-where near a school.他们为什么长大了还要进学校啊我只晓得，等我一长大，我要分开学校远远的，越远越好。“Sure I hate school,” Miss Daisy continued. “If I did

8、nt have to be here teaching you, I could be home sitting on my com-fortable couch, watching TV and eating bonbons.”“我当真厌恶学校，”戴西小姐说上来，“要不是不得不来这里教你们，我就能够待在家里，坐在我舒服的沙发上，看电视，吃巧巧果。” “Wow!” we all said.“哇！”咱们全都叫起来。“Whats a bonbon” asked Ryan, a kid with black sneakers who was sitting next to me.“巧巧果是什么啊”坐

9、在我旁边，穿黑色静止鞋的男生瑞安问道。“Bonbons are these wonderful chocolate treats,” Miss Daisy told us. “Theyre about the size of a large acorn, and you can pop the whole thing right in your mouth so you dont need a napkin. I could eat a whole box of bonbons in one sitting.”“巧巧果是了不起的巧克力糖。”戴西小姐通知他，“一颗巧巧果跟一颗大橡果大小差不多，能

10、够整颗扔到嘴里去，就用不着手纸了。坐上去我一口吻能够吃完一盒巧巧果。” “They sound delicious!” said Andrea Young, a girl with curly brown hair. She was sitting up real straight in the front of the class with her hands folded like they were attached to each other.“听起来挺好吃的。”棕色卷发的女生安德烈亚说。她挺直身子坐在头排，两只手穿插着，像绑着似的。Miss Daisy seemed like a p

11、retty cool lady, for a teacher. Anybody who hated school and liked to sit around watching TV and eating chocolate treats was okay by me.戴西小姐尽管是一位教师，却更像一位高贵小姐。关于我来说，只需厌恶学校，喜爱坐在那里看电视，吃巧克力糖，不论是谁都是好的。Me and Miss Daisy had a lot in common. Maybe going to school would-nt be so terrible after all.我和戴西小姐有许多

12、共同点。上学兴许不那么可怕。 2Dumb Miss Daisy and Principal KlutzMiss Daisy said it was time for us to clear off our desks and see how much we knew about arithmetic. 戴西教师说咱们该把课桌上的东西收拾好，看看咱们对算术晓得些什么。 Ugh! 唉！ “If I gave you fifty-eight apples and Principal Klutz took twenty-eight of them away,” Miss Daisy asked, “h

13、ow many apples would you have left.” “假如我给你五十八个苹果，克卢茨校长拿走了二十八个，你还有几个苹果呢，阿仔”戴西小姐问我. （Note：数学算术题的表达方式，孩子们记牢这个句型哦） “Who cares how many apples you would have left” I said. “I hate apples. If you ask me, you and Principal Klutz can take all the apples away and it wouldnt bother me one bit.” “谁在乎还剩下几个啊”我说

14、，“我讨厌苹果。要是你问我，你和克卢茨校长能够把苹果全给拿走，我一点也不在乎。” “You would have thirty apples,” said that girl Andrea Young in the front of the class. She had a big smile on her face, like she had just opened all her birthday presents. Andrea Young thinks shes so smart. “你还有三十个苹果。”坐第一排的女生安德烈亚说。她满脸堆笑，就像她刚打开她的生日礼物似的。安德烈亚自认为

15、她很聪明。 “I hate arithmetic,” I announced.“我讨厌算术。”我申明说。 “You know what” Miss Daisy said. “I hate arithmetic too!” “你晓得吗”戴西小姐说，“我也讨厌算术！” “You do” we all said. “你也讨厌”我们说。 I dont even know what you get if youmultiply four timesfour.” “没错。我甚至连四乘以四是多少也不晓得。” （multiply 乘以）注意4x4的用法：4 multiplied by 4 或者4 times

16、4 “You dont” “你不晓得” “I have no idea,”Miss Daisy said, scratching her head andwrinkling up her forehead like she was trying to figure it out. “Maybe one of you kids can explain it to me” “我不晓得。”戴西小姐说，她抓抓头，皱起眉头，如同要把它苦苦算出来的样子，“兴许你们谁能跟我解释解释” Boy, Miss Daisy was really dumb! Even I know what you get when

17、 youmultiply four times four. But that smarty-pants-I-know-everything-girl Andrea Young beat me to it and got called on first. 唉，戴西小姐真是笨！四乘以四连我都晓得是多少。可是那位自以为是的女生安德烈亚领先被叫到了。 “If you put four crayons in a row,” she told Miss Daisy as she put a bunch of crayons on the top of her desk, “and you make fou

18、r rows of four crayons, youll have sixteen crayons. See” Then she counted the crayons from one to sixteen. “假如你把四支蜡笔摆成一排，”她一边把蜡笔放在课桌上，一边通知戴西教师，“一排一排摆上四排，你就有了十六支蜡笔。看到了吗”她数蜡笔，从一数到十六。 Miss Daisy looked at the crayons on Andreas desk. She had a puzzled look on her face. 戴西小姐看安德烈亚课桌上的蜡笔。她一脸没弄懂的神气。 “Im no

19、t sure I understand,” she said. “Can somebody else explain it to me” “我还是不大懂，”她说，“还有谁能给我讲讲吗” Michael Robinson, this kid wearing a red T-shirt with a dirt bike on it, explained four times four again, using pencils. He had sixteen pencils on his desk, in four rows of four pencils. Miss Daisy still had

20、 a look on her face like she didnt under-stand. 迈克尔，一个穿白色T恤，T恤上有辆灰不溜秋自行车的男生，这一回用铅笔来讲。他在他的课桌上摆上十六支铅笔，四支一排，共四排。戴西小姐脸上还是那副没弄懂的神气。 “What would happen if yousubtractedhalf of the pencils” she asked. “要是减去一半又会怎样呢” Michael took away two of the rows of pencils and put them in his pencil box. 迈克尔于是拿掉两排铅笔，放回铅

21、笔盒里。 “Then you would have eight pencils!”we all said. “那就剩下八支铅笔了！”我们说。 Andrea Young added, “Half of sixteen is eight.” 安德烈亚加上一句：“十六的半数就是八。” Miss Daisy wrinkled up her forehead until it was almost like an accordion. She still didnt get it! 戴西小姐眉头皱得像手风琴。她还是不明白！ She started counting the pencils on Mich

22、aels desk out loud and using her fingers. She got it all wrong. We gathered around Michaels desk and tried to explain to Miss Daisy how to add, sub-tract, multiply, and divide numbers using the pencils. 她开始大声说，用手指数迈克尔课桌上的铅笔。她全数错了。咱们围到迈克尔的课桌四周，想给戴西小姐解释，该怎么用铅笔做加减乘除。 Nothing worked. Miss Daisy had to b

23、e the dumbest teacher in the history of the world! No matter how many times we tried to explain, she kept shaking her head. 没有用。戴西小姐是有史以来最笨的教师！不论咱们讲了多少次，她不断在摇她的头。 “Im sorry,” she said. “It will take me a while to understand arithmetic. Maybe you can explain it to me more tomorrow. For now we have to

24、 clean off our desks because Principal Klutz is going to come in and talk to us.” “很对不起，”她说，“弄懂算术我得花点工夫。改天再解释吧。现在大家把课桌上的东西放好，因为克卢茨校长这就要来跟咱们讲话了。” I know all about principals. My friend Billy from around the corner, who was in second grade last year, told me that the principal is like the king of the

25、school. He runs everything. 校长的事我全晓得。我有一个朋友住在附近，叫做比利，他去年读二年级，是他告诉我说，校长就像学校的国王。他管所有的事。 Billy says that if you break the rules, you have to go to the principals office, which is in a dungeon down in the basement. Kids in the dungeon get locked up and are forced to listen to their parents old CDs for h

26、ours. It must be horrible. 比利说，万一犯了校规，就要上校长室去，那是个地牢。孩子们给关在这地牢里，被逼着听许多个钟头他们父母的老式唱片。肯定可怕极了。 Miss Daisy told us to be on our best behavior so Principal Klutz would see how mature we were. Finally he walked into our room. 戴西小姐叫我们要十分规矩，让克卢茨校长看到我们有多听话。然后他走进了我们的教室。 “Welcome to the second grade,” he said ch

27、eerfully. “Im sure we are all going to have a wonderful year together.” “欢送大家来上二年级！”他兴致勃勃地说，“我相信我们肯定会好好过上一年。” Principal Klutz said a lot of stuff about the rules of the school. Were not allowed to run in the halls, and were not allowed to chew gum. Stuff like that. 克卢茨校长讲了一大堆校规：我们在学校里不许奔跑，我们不能够吃口香糖，

28、诸如此类。 But I wasnt listening very closely because I kept staring at his head. He had no hair at all! I mean none! His head looked like a giant egg. 可我没好好听，因为我只管盯住他的头看。他头上一根头发也没有！是个秃顶！他的头看着像个大鸡蛋。 When Principal Klutz was all done telling us the rules of the school, he asked if anybody had any question

29、s about what he had said. 克卢茨校长讲完校规当前，他问大家有什么问题没有。 “Did all your hair fall out of your head,” I asked, “or did you cut it off” Everybody laughed, even though I didnt say anything funny. Miss Daisy looked at me with a mean face. “你的头发是从你的头上掉的，还是你剃掉的呢”我问道。大家哈哈大笑，尽管我说的话没什么好笑的。戴西小姐用不难看的神色看我。 “Actually,

30、it was both,” Principal Klutz replied with a chuckle. “Almost all of my hair fell out on its own, so I decided to shave the rest of it off.” “说真的，两者都有。”克卢茨校长咯咯笑着答复，“我的头发大部分都掉了，于是我决议入手把剩下的干脆剃掉。” “Thats the saddest story I ever heard!” said this girl named Emily, and she burst into tears. “这是我听到过的最悲伤的

31、故事了。”一个叫埃米莉的女生说，哇哇哭起来。 “Dont feel bad,” Principal Klutz said. “It could have been a lot worse.” “不要伤心。”克卢茨校长说，“原本还会更坏呢。” “How” sniffled Emily. “怎样啦”埃米莉啜泣着问。 “Well, at least my brain didnt fall out of my head!” “额。至少我的脑子没从头上掉上去！” We all laughed, even Emily. Principal Klutz was a pretty funny guy, for

32、 a principal. 我们大家哈哈大笑，连埃米莉也笑了。克卢茨校长尽管是一位校长，却也是一位很搞笑的家伙。 “Any other questions” “还有别的问题吗” “Do you have a dungeon down in the basement where you put the bad kids” I asked. “你有一个地牢吗，把坏先生关在里面的”我又问。 “Actually, the dungeon is on the third floor,” Principal Klutz replied. “说真的，那地牢在三楼。”克卢茨校长说。 Nobody laughed this time. He q