1、2 We love to hear the stories of people who have been transformed by their tribulations, perhaps because they testify to a bona fide type of psychological truth, one that sometimes gets lost amid endless reports of disaster: There seems to be a built-in human capacity to flourish under the most diff
2、icult circumstances. Positive responses to profoundly disturbing experiences are not limited to the toughest or the bravest. In fact, roughly half the people who struggle with adversity say that their lives subsequently in some ways improved.2我们都爱听人们经历苦难后发生转变的故事,可能是因为这些故事证实了一条真正的心理学上的真理,这条真理有时会湮没在无数
3、关于灾难的报道中:在最困难的境况中,人所具有的一种内在的奋发向上的能力会进发出来。对那些令人极度恐慌的经历做出积极回应的并不仅限于最坚强或最勇敢的人。实际上,大约半数与逆境抗争过的人都说他们的生活从此在某些方面有了改善。3 This and other promising findings about the life-changing effects of crises are the province of the new science of post-traumatic growth. This fledgling field has already proved the truth
4、of what once passed as bromide: What doesnt kill you can actually make you stronger. Post-traumatic stress is far from the only possible outcome. In the wake of even the most terrifying experiences, only a small proportion of adults become chronically troubled. More commonly, people rebound-or even
5、eventually thrive.3诸如此类有关危机改变一生的发现有着可观的研究前景,这正是创伤后成长这一新学科的研究领域。这一新兴领域已经证实了曾经被视为陈词滥调的一个真理:大难不死,意志弥坚。创伤后压力绝不是唯一可能的结果。在遭遇了即使最可怕的经历之后,也只有一小部分成年人会受到长期的心理折磨。更常见的情况是,人们会恢复过来甚至最终会成功发达。4 Those who weather adversity well are living proof of the paradoxes of happiness. We need more than pleasure to live the be
6、st possible life. Our contemporary quest for happiness has shriveled to a hunt for bliss-a life protected from bad feelings, free from pain and confusion.4那些经受住苦难打击的人是有关幸福悖论的生动例证:为了尽可能地过上最好的生活,我们所需要的不仅仅是愉悦的感受。我们这个时代的人对幸福的追求已经缩小到只追求福气:一生没有烦恼,没有痛苦和困惑。5 This anodyne definition of well-being leaves out
7、the better half of the story, the rich, full joy that comes from a meaningful life. It is the dark matter of happiness, the ineffable quality we admire in wise men and women and aspire to cultivate in our own lives. It turns out that some of the people who have suffered the most, who have been force
8、d to contend with shocks they never anticipated and to rethink the meaning of their lives, may have the most to tell us about that profound and intensely fulfilling journey that philosophers used to call the search for the good life.5这种对幸福的平淡定义忽略了问题的主要方面一种富有意义的生活所带来的那种丰富、完整的愉悦。那就是幸福背后隐藏的那种本质是我们在明智的男
9、男女女身上所欣赏到并渴望在我们自己生活中培育的那种不可言喻的品质。事实证明,一些遭受苦难最多的人他们被迫全力应付他们未曾预料到的打击,并重新思考他们生活的意义或许对那种深刻的、给人以强烈满足感的人生经历(哲学家们过去称之为对“美好生活”的探寻)最有发言权。6 This broader definition of good living blends deep satisfaction and a profound connection to others through empathy. It is dominated by happy feelings but seasoned also w
10、ith nostalgia and regret. Happiness is only one among many values in human life, contends Laura King, a psychologist at the University of Missouri in Columbia. Compassion, wisdom, altruism, insight, creativity-sometimes only the trials of adversity can foster these qualities, because sometimes only
11、drastic situations can force us to take on the painful process of change. To live a full human life, a tranquil, carefree existence is not enough. We also need to grow-and sometimes growing hurts.6这种对美好生活的更为广泛的定义把深深的满足感和一种通过移情与他人建立的深切联系融合在一起。它主要受愉悦情感的支配,但同时也夹杂着惆怅和悔恨。密苏里大学哥伦比亚分校的心理学家劳拉金认为:“幸福仅仅是许许多多人
12、生价值中的一种。”慈悲、智慧、无私、洞察力及创造力有时只有经历逆境的考验才能培育这些品质,因为有时只有极端的情形才能迫使我们去承受痛苦的改变过程。只过安宁的、无忧无虑的生活是不足以体验一段完整的人生的。我们也需要成长尽管有时成长是痛苦的。7 In a dark room in Queens, New York, 31-year-old fashion designer Tracy Cyr believed she was dying. A few months before, she had stopped taking the powerful immune-suppressing drug
13、s that kept her arthritis in check. She never anticipated what would happen: a withdrawal reaction that eventually left her in total body agony and neurological meltdown. The slightest movement-trying to swallow, for example-was excruciating. Even the pressure of her cheek on the pillow was almost u
14、nbearable.7在纽约市皇后区一间漆黑的房间里,31岁的时装设计师特蕾西.塞尔感到自己奄奄一息。就在几个月前,她已经停止服用控制她关节炎的强效免疫抑制药。她从没预见到接下来将要发生的事:停药之后的反应最终使她全身剧烈疼痛,神经系统出现严重问题。最轻微的动作比如说试着吞咽对她来说也痛苦不堪。甚至将脸压在枕头上也几乎难以忍受。8 Cyr is no wimp-diagnosed with juvenile rheumatoid arthritis at the age of two, she had endured the symptoms and the treatments (drugs
15、, surgery) her whole life. But this time, she was way past her limits, and nothing her doctors did seemed to help. Either the disease was going to kill her or, pretty soon, she felt she might have to kill herself.8塞尔并不是懦弱的人。她在两岁时就被诊断得了幼年型类风湿性关节炎,一生都在忍受着病症和治疗(药物、手术)的折磨。但是这一次,她实在不堪忍受了,她的医生所做的一切似乎都不起作用
16、。要么让疾病结束她的生命,要么她就得很快了结自己的生命了。9 As her sleepless nights wore on, though, her suicidal thoughts began to be interrupted by new feelings of gratitude. She was still in agony, but a new consciousness grew stronger each night: an awesome sense of liberation, combined with an all-encompassing feeling of s
17、ympathy and compassion. I felt stripped of everything Id ever identified myself with, she said six months later. Everything I thought Id known or believed in was useless-time, money, self-image, perception. Recognizing that was so freeing.9然而,在经历了若干个不眠之夜后,她想自杀的念头开始被新的感激之情所打断。虽然她仍然感到痛苦,但一种新的意识每一夜都变得更
18、加强烈:一种令人惊叹的解脱感,结合着一种包容一切的同情和怜悯的情感。“我感到一切我曾经用来认同自己身份的东西都被剥夺了,”六个月后她这样说道,“一切我认为我知道或相信的事物时间、金钱、自我形象、对事物的看法都毫无价值了。意识到这一点真是让我感到解脱。10 Within a few months, she began to be able to move more freely, thanks to a cocktail of steroids and other drugs. She says now theres no question that her life is better. l
19、felt I had been shown the secret of life and why were here: to be happy and to nurture other life. Its that simple.10在几个月内,得益于类固醇加其他药物的鸡尾酒疗法,她开始能够更加自如地活动了。她说,毫无疑问她现在的生活状况有了好转。“我感觉我窥探到了生命的秘密以及我们生存的意义,那就是快乐地生活,同时扶持他人。就这么简单!11 Her mind-blowing experience came as a total surprise. But that feeling of tr
20、ansformation is in some ways typical, says Rich Tedeschi, a professor of psychology at the University of North Carolina in Charlotte who coined the term post-traumatic growth. His studies of people who have endured extreme events, like combat, violent crime or sudden serious illness show that most f
21、eel dazed and anxious in the immediate aftermath; they are preoccupied with the idea that their lives have been shattered. A few are haunted long afterward by memory problems, sleep trouble and similar symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder. But Tedeschi and others have found that for many peopl
22、e-perhaps even the majority-life ultimately becomes richer and more gratifying.11她这种不可思议的经历完全是个惊喜。但是北卡罗来纳大学夏洛特分校心理学教授里奇特德斯基认为,这种转变的感觉从某些方面看却是很典型的。里奇特德斯基教授首创了“创伤后成长”一词。他对那些经历了诸如搏斗、暴力犯罪、突患重病等极端事件的人群进行了研究,这些研究表明,在刚经历不幸后大多数人随即都会感到茫然和焦虑。他们一心想的就是,自己的生活完全被毁了。有少部分人事后很久了还不断被记忆问题、失眠以及类似的创伤后应激障碍所折磨。但特德斯基和其他学者发
23、现,对很多人(可能甚至是绝大多数人)来说,生活最终会变得更加丰富和更加令人满足。12 Something similar happens to many people who experience a terrifying physical threat. In that moment, our sense of invulnerability is pierced, and the self-protective mental armor that normally stands between us and our perceptions of the world is torn away
24、. Our everyday life scripts-our habits, self-perceptions and assumptions-go out the window, and we are left with a raw experience of the world.12许多经历过恐怖的人身威胁的人会遇到类似的情况。在事情发生的那一瞬间,我们的安全感被冲破了,平时处于我们与我们对世界的种种看法之间的自我保护的精神盔甲被剥离了。我们的日常生活轨迹(我们的习惯、自我认识和主观意念)全部被抛到九霄云外,只剩下对世界的原始体验。13 Still, actually implement
25、ing these changes, as well as fully coming to terms with a new reality, usually takes conscious effort. Being willing and able to take on this process is one of the major differences between those who grow through adversity and those who are destroyed by it. The people who find value in adversity ar
26、ent the toughest or the most rational. What makes them different is that they are able to incorporate what happened into the story of their own life.13尽管如此,要实际实现这些转变并完全接受新的现实,通常需要有意识地付出努力。是否愿意并有能力承担这个过程,就是那些在灾难中成长和那些被灾难所摧毁的人之间主要的区别之一。认为灾难有价值的人并不是最坚强或最理性的人。使他们与众不同的是他们能够将所遭遇的事融入他们自己的人生历程中。14 Eventuall
27、y, they may find themselves freed in ways they never imagined. Survivors say they have become more tolerant and forgiving of others, capable of bringing peace to formerly troubled relationships. They say that material ambitions suddenly seem silly and the pleasures of friends and family paramount-an
28、d that the crisis allowed them to recognize life in line with their new priorities.14最终,他们可能会发现自己以从未想到过的方式获得了解脱。幸存者往往说他们变得更加宽容,也更能原谅别人,能够缓和原本糟糕的关系。他们说物质追求突然间变得很无聊,而朋友和家庭带来的快乐变得极为重要,他们还说危机使他们能够按照这些新的优先之事来重新认识生活。15 People who have grown from adversity often feel much less fear, despite the frightening
29、 things theyve been through. They are surprised by their own strength, confident that they can handle whatever else life throws at them. People dont say that what they went through was wonderful, says Tedeschi. They werent meaning to grow from it. They were just trying to survive. But in retrospect,
30、 what they gained was more than they ever anticipated.15从灾难中成长起来的人尽管经历过恐怖的事情,但他们的恐惧感往往大为减少。他们对自己的力量感到吃惊,相信不管今后生活中将要遭遇什么,他们都能应付。特德斯基说:“人们不会说他们所经历的是美好的。他们并不是特意要通过这样的经历来成长。他们只是尽其所能生存下来。但回顾起来,他们的收获远远大于他们所预料的。16 In his recent book Satisfaction, Emory University psychiatrist Gregory Berns points to extrem
31、e endurance athletes who push themselves to their physical limits for days at a time. They cycle through the same sequence of sensations as do trauma survivors: self-loss, confusion and, finally, a new sense of mastery. For ultramarathoners, who regularly run 100-mile races that last more than 24 hours, vomiting and hallucinating are normal. Aft
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