环球雅思作文宝库.docx

1、环球雅思作文宝库雅思作文宝库 (中外考生习作和优秀范文详解)75篇雅思学员习作精批75篇国内外优秀雅思范文洗礼过后，你就是雅思写作小专家Write in plain English 使用简明英语写雅思作文Keep it short and simple 简洁但不失严谨 编著：赵曙明 Global WriterThe main goal in writing is to convey your ideas with the greatest possible clarity and to design and write in a way that best serves your reader

2、s. Plain English is clear, straightforward expression, using only as many words as are necessary.Plain language is clear language. It is simple and direct but not simplistic or simple-minded. 前 言这是一本备考雅思的烤鸭们不能不看的书，因为编者每天都批改大量的学员习作，最熟悉考生的真实水平。这本书选择的习作非常有代表性，您经常会有对号入座的错觉，阅读他们的习作就仿佛在阅读自己的作品。这本书对每篇习作都进行

3、了地毯式的批改，点评一语中的，让您对如何提分一目了然。我们用全新视角审视雅思写作，彻底打破了雅思写作的魔咒。您完全可以在写作中找到学习英语的自信和乐趣，您只需具备新概念二的文字水平就可以写出高分雅思作文。我们用数万篇雅思习作的积淀向您保证，您从此不必为雅思写作而焦虑。大家只知道中国大陆考生雅思写作平均分低，却忽视了一个很重要的事实：烤鸭们在作文训练上要么太盲目要么花的时间太少，很多人都快要考试了还没有找人批改过自己的作文，甚至有不少人根本没有认真写过任何一篇雅思作文！如果训练没有指导，写作很难在短期内提高。实际上，缺乏指导的您在短期内不论写多少篇雅思作文，写作水平都不可能得到明显提高。而这本书

4、让您避免盲目的练习，您即使很少练习写作，也能了解雅思写作的全部。与学员害怕写作和口语考试不同的是，不少英语教师的雅思口语和写作成绩却高于阅读成绩，而这种好事几乎不可能发生在可爱的学员们身上。环球雅思写作中心一份分析报告表明，学员提交的雅思作文存在大量的语言错误。我们惊讶地发现，大部分同学不能写出正确的句子，更别谈灵活的变化，大大降低了文章的可读性。实际上，用词造句错误率低是获得雅思写作高分的关键。在环球雅思工作8年，笔者还从来没有看到过一篇没有用词造句错误的雅思习作，不少学员写出的作文根本没有完全正确的句子。这本书揭露了中国大陆雅思考生在英文写作当中的种种劣迹，我们不希望看到低分雅思作文这样炼

5、成！这些错误本可以避免，但是不少考生的追求太不现实。在明知自己的遣词造句能力奇差无比的情况下，大部分考生根本没有把写作重心放在回答问题上，而是寄希望于生僻词、超级长句难句的使用。历史总是惊人地相似，前赴后继的大陆考生年复一年地重复一项耻辱的记录：雅思作文平均分常年在亚洲排名倒数，仅仅好于几个阿拉伯石油国家的纨绔子弟刷出来的成绩。成绩比中国男足还要惨烈，好在比较稳定！我们的学员对高分有着莫名的向往。但是，当大陆考生每天都在煞有介事地背单词，而雅思作文平均分却低于5.3分的时候，那种认为词汇量大就意味着能够考出雅思写作高分的观点是否站得住脚？向学员灌输那些所谓的高分词汇或者长难句是不是可取？当自己

6、连名词单复数和动词变位的概念都没有的时候，雅思备考的策略是否需要调整？ 到底如何在短期内提高自己的英文写作能力？我们认为雅思作文阅卷标准就是答案。这本书没有创立自己的理论，以免混淆视听。我们返璞归真，从雅思作文四大评分标准的角度对大陆考生提交的习作进行了全面精细的批改和点评。所有的范文都经过了严格筛选，所有词汇都符合plain English的要求。范文简约而不简单。我们对学员习作进行了详细的解剖，并提供了评估报告，如：评估报告（Evaluation Report）Task Response 得分：61) how fully and appropriately the candidate ha

7、s answered all parts of the task（完整）2) the extent to which the candidates ideas are relevant, developed and supported.习作的ideas符合题目要求；对causes的分析很到位，and they are developed and supported。但是对第二个问题（problems）的分析过于简单，没有进行解释或者拓展。3) the extent to which the candidates position is clear and effective 这一点指的是作文给

8、读者的整体感觉，相当于国内阅卷的“整体评分法”。第二段论证效率不高，段落太长，请把段落限制在100个单词以内；第三段拓展不够，也缺乏证据Coherence and Cohesion得分：61) how well the information and ideas are organized and presented, including paragraphing. 分段合理，ideas 的组织不错但是表达欠缺。2) how well the information is linked. 较差。有些句子与周边句子缺乏逻辑过渡。Lexical Resources 得分：51) the range

9、 of vocabulary used 词汇使用不灵活；习作体现出你会用的写作词汇量十分有限2) how accurately it is used 很多用词不准确，表达不到位3) how appropriate it is for the task 部分用词不符合Plain English标准,要么口语化，要么太生僻。比如：a lot of; manifestation.Grammatical Range and Accuracy 得分：51) the range of structures used 变化较多，几乎使用了全部所需的句型2) how accurately they are u

10、sed 很多句子结构使用不准确，很多语句不通顺。请注意：标点符号的正确使用；雅思写作所有句子必须具备主语和谓语结构；从句不能单独加句号结束，必须出示主句。很多动词和名词有变化，不能裸体出现。3) how appropriate they are for the task 基本符合plain English要求：没有出现感叹句、祈使句等；长度适中（25个单词以内）。注意雅思写作只能以句号或者问号结束一个句子。在评估报告中，我们真正做到了全面地解析学员习作在每一项评分细则上的得失情况。尤其是对词汇和语法评分标准的最后一项，一贯被国内的专家们忽视。我们翻阅了几乎所有国内的雅思写作书籍都没有找到满意的

11、答案，我们也一度感到困惑。在环球雅思写作中心工作期间，笔者有幸接触到了一些英美人士批阅的雅思习作，在他们给出的评估报告中得到了答案。他们对student essays 的要求是使用plain English写作，句子长度不能超过25个单词。而国内的雅思培训界对这两点的忽视导致了雅思写作培训教师盲目追求词汇量和长难句，网络上出现的大量模板句型都严重违背了雅思写作的原则。当然了，另一个极端就是用词造句过于随意，比如使用感叹句、祈使句写作或者使用俚语、口头语言等不正式的词汇写作；然而在学员提交的数万篇雅思习作中，不到百分之一的同学犯这个错误，上过雅思写作课的同学都有这个常识。为了最大限度地帮助您，每

12、一篇学员习作后面都提供一篇优秀习作，我们对习作的亮点进行了点评。这本书将为学员提供宝贵的素材库和正确的雅思写作备考指导。看完我们的范文和点评，您不会再害怕雅思写作，更不会为自己词汇量不大而过分担心。基于中国大陆雅思考生英语遣词造句能力普遍较差的事实，我们在选择范文的时候摒弃了一些辞藻过分华丽的作文，而是选择了一些语言比较简练、言简意赅的优秀范文，希望读者理解我们的良苦用心。Plain EnglishPlain English is clear, straightforward expression, using only as many words as are necessary. It i

13、s language that avoids obscurity, inflated vocabulary and convoluted sentence construction. It is not baby talk, nor is it a simplified version of the English language. Writers of plain language let their audience concentrate on the message instead of being distracted by complicated language.They ma

14、ke sure that their audience understands the message easily.简明英语指的是清晰、直白的语言表达方式，这种表达提倡使用尽可能少的词汇来写作。简明英语反对使用华而不实的词汇和臃肿的句子结构，因为那样会使得语言表达含糊不清。简明英语不是低级的幼儿英语，也不是简化版的英文。使用简明英语写作的作者意在帮助读者把注意力放在作者表达的信息本身，而不是在令人费解的语言上。以这种方式写作的作者意在方便读者，帮助他们轻易理解作品传递的信息。Professor Robert EaglesonThe main goal in writing is to con

15、vey your ideas with the greatest possible clarity and to design and write in a way that best serves your readers. Plain language is clear language. It is simple and direct but not simplistic or simple-minded. Global IELTS Education helps you write in plain language by identifying words and phrases i

16、n your writing that detract from clarity. We question the use of long sentences and inflated vocabulary and aim to make you think about every word you write. Global IELTS Education does not encourage a standard style that everyone should follow. Rather, by helping you break out of the typical stereo

17、typed writing, Global IELTS Education encourages you to express yourself in your own words.Using plain language does not mean everyones writing must sound the same. There is no one right way to express an idea. Every thought can be expressed in many different ways and the variety comes from the indi

18、vidual way we approach an idea or writing task. Theres plenty of room for individual style, rhetoric and imaginative writing. So let Global IELTS Education help you get rid of your poor writing habits and let you express yourself in your own words.Student Essays 学生话题作文（论文）Confronted with an essay, t

19、erm paper, dissertation or other academic paper, students often fall into the traps of failing to answer the question, adopting a stilted academic tone and using a long-winded style. Like all good writing, essays should be clear, direct, relevant and interesting. To do this, you must concentrate on

20、the central question, 集中注意力思考核心问题 plan the paper selecting specific and relevant information, 选择具体的相关的信息进行谋篇布局 include good examples and illustrations, and 需要必要的说明或者证明write in a concise and readable style. 遣词造句应该言简意赅The aim should not be to display an academic superiority, but to show a confidence o

21、f the subject matter and to inform the reader of the relevance of your knowledge to the question. Start by making sure you do understand the question. Look for key words defining the scope of your writing, such as: compare, contrast, criticize, define, describe, discuss, evaluate, justify, outline,

22、review, summaries. Use the checklist to help you write your essays.Checklist1. Read and understand the question. 读懂问题2. Plan to answer the question. 谋篇布局，确保以最好的方式回答问题3. Select relevant information - dont include everything you know. 挑选素材不能漫无目的4. Summaries your answer in the opening paragraph. 开篇名义5.

23、 Develop one idea or theme in each paragraph. 一个idea写一段，并且在主题句后对这个idea进行拓展6. Link paragraphs to make the writing flow. 注意段落衔接，保证所有的段落组成完美的整体7. Use plain language, avoiding an academic or abstract style. 使用简明英语，避免学术化或者抽象化8. Impress with clarity. Dont waffle, repeat yourself or ramble. 以简洁明了打动读者。避免含糊、

24、简单重复或者漫无目的的描述。9. Conclude by summarizing your findings or views. 结尾段总结自己的观点新发现10. Proofread (and edit) your work. 检查习作(必要的话对文字进行编辑再提交习作)The Principles of Good Writing 优秀作文应该遵循的原则Good writing is clear and concise（简明扼要）. It uses short sentences and simple words, keeps to the facts, and is easy to unde

25、rstand. Good writing is easy to recognize - it makes you want to read more. For most of us, good writing doesnt come naturally; its a skill we need to learn.You can improve your writing by following the accepted principles of good writing. The principles that underlie all good writing are: Plan and

26、organize your material. 合理组织写作素材 Keep your average sentence length low. 尽量缩短句子长度 Use verbs to give your writing action. 尽量使用动词，增强表达效果 Prefer the simple word to the complex word. 用词尽量从简 Make every word count. 不要说废话 Avoid jargon, clichs and foreign words. 避免使用专业术语、陈词滥调和外来词 Use correct spelling, punctu

27、ation and grammar. 使用正确的拼写、标点符号和语法 Read and revise everything you write. 必须彻底检查自己的作文并做必要的修改Plain Language Community in English-spoken CountriesGovernments and private organizations around the world support plain language. 美国The Plain Language Action and Information Network (PLAIN)http:/www.plainlang

28、uage.gov/Originally called the Plain English Network, PLAIN has been meeting informally since the mid 1990s. Our goal is to promote the use of plain language for all government communications. We believe that using plain language will save federal agencies time and money and provide better service t

29、o the American public.加拿大PLAIN LANGUAGE ASSOCIATION INTERNATIONAL http:/www.plainlanguagenetwork.org/Plain Language Association International includes professionals who plan, write, design, and create communications projects to better serve the needs of the public, clients, customers, students, and

30、staff. Their site provides free plain language articles, writing tutorials, Web links, news, networking opportunities, professional support, and an e-mail discussion group. 英国The United Kingdom has two different private sector groups supporting plain language: The Plain Language Commission accredits

31、 public documents and websites with the Clear English Standard logo and provides training in plain language.The Plain English Campaign is an independent pressure group fighting for public information to be written in plain English.澳大利亚In Australia, plain language has become a commercial success. Dem

32、and for clear language has increased, and law firms that provide plain-language legal products are finding success. 欧盟The European Commission has created a guide for writing clearly in several languages. President Obama signs plain writing actBill to Simplify Public Documents Now Becomes Law奥巴马总统签署简明英语法案意在简化政府公文的议案成为美国法律Wash