高中英语《Frinds老友记》第6季中英文对照完整剧本612 The One With The Joke素材.docx
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高中英语《Frinds老友记》第6季中英文对照完整剧本612TheOneWithTheJoke素材
612TheOneWithTheJoke
[Scene:
CentralPerk,Chandler,Phoebe,RachelandMonicaarethere.Rosswalksinwithamagazineinhishand.]
Ross:
Hey,you’renotgoingtobelievethis.ImadeupajokeandsentitintoPlayboy.Theyprintedit!
Phoebe:
Ididn’tknowPlayboyprintsjokes.
Ross:
Yeah,theyprintjokes,interviews,hard-hittingjournalism.It’snotjustaboutthepictures.
Monica:
Thatdidn’tworkonmom,it’snotgoingtoworkonus.
Ross:
(showingthemthepage)Here,checkitout.It’sthefirstone,too.
(Theyalllaughindifferently,exceptChandler,who’salittleangry.)
Chandler:
Thatisfunny.ItwasalsofunnywhenImadeitup.
Ross:
What?
Chandler:
Imadethatjokeup.
Ross:
Uh,oh-oh,noyoudidn’t.Idid.
Chandler:
Yes,Idid.ItoldittoDanatwork,andhesaiditwasthefunniestjokehe’deverheard.
Ross:
Hey,tellDan,‘Thanks.’
(Rachelislookingatthemagazineandlaughing.)
Ross:
What?
Rachel:
I’msorry,Iwasjustreadingthejokebelowit.Man,thatoneisfunny.(Rossgrabsthemagazineawayfromher.)
Chandler:
Monica,youremembermetellingyouthatjoke,right?
Monica:
No.
Chandler:
Seriously?
Monica:
Well,youtellalotofjokes!
Ross:
Look,Chandler,it’smyjoke.But,hey,ifitmakesyoufeelanybettertheydon’tprintthename,soitdoesn’treallymatterwhogetscredit,right?
Chandler:
Yeah,Iguess.
Joey:
(entering)Heyguys.
Chandler:
(jumpingupfromhischair)Hey,Joey,Playboyprintedmyjoke.
Ross:
No,it’smyjoke,it’smine.Youcancallthem,they’lltellyou.
Chandler:
It’smyjoke.
Ross:
It’smyjoke.
Joey:
Whoa-whoa-whoa.Jokes?
Youguysknowtheyhavenakedchicksinthere,right?
OpeningCredits
[Scene:
Joey’sapartment,JoeyissittingatthecounterasChandlerenters.]
Chandler:
Dude,youhavegottoturnonBehindtheMusic.ThebandHeartishavingareallytoughtime,andIthinktheymaybreakup.
Joey:
Let’sgowatchitatyourplace.
Chandler:
Nah,Monica’swatchingsomecookingshow.Comeon,Idon’twanttomisswhentheywereskinny.
Joey:
Chandler,Chandler,y’knowwhatweshoulddo?
YouandIshouldgooutandgetsomenewsunglasses.
Chandler:
What?
No,Iwanttowatchthis.(Heturnsonthetelevisionandthescreeniscompletelycoveredinsnow).Didyourcablegoout?
Joey:
No,that’sVH-1.Igottatellyou,themusicthesekidslistentotoday...It’slikealottanoisetome.Idon’tknow…
Chandler:
Joey,whyisyourca
bleout?
Joey:
Iuh,oh!
Because,uh,Ihaven’treallypaidthebill
Chandler:
Ifyouneedmoney,willyouplease-pleasejustletmeloanyousomemoney?
Joey:
No,Chandler.Look,forgetaboutit,okay?
Look,IknowthingshavebeenalittletightsinceJaninemovedout.Oh,wasshehot.
Chandler:
Whoaho.
Joey:
Iknow!
Yeah,but,lookIcanhandleit.Allright?
Look,Icanlistentotheradio,huh?
AndRossgavemethisgreatbook(holdsupthePlayboymagazine).
Chandler:
(picksupthephone)Allright,youwanttoseeifthejokestealerwillletuswatchtheshowathisplace?
Joey:
Sure.
Chandler:
(withphonetoear,obviouslyhearingnodialtone)Paidyourphonebill?
Joey:
Notsomuch.
[Scene:
MonicaandChandler's,MonicaandRachelareonthecouchlookingatthePlayboymagazine.Whentheyhearsomeonecoming,Monicagoestohideitunderthesofacushions.]
Phoebe:
(entering)Hey.
Monica:
(relieved)It’sonlyyou.
Phoebe:
Wh-wh-whatareyoudoing?
Rachel:
WearelookingataPlayboy.
Phoebe:
Oh,Iwanttolooktoo!
(Sherunsoverandsitsdownandchecksoutapicture).Yikes!
Monica:
Sodoyouthinkthatthesepictures—Are,aretheytryingtotellastory?
Rachel:
Oh,yeah,sure.Imean,likeinthecaseofthisyoungwoman,shehaslostherclothes,sosheridesnakedonthehorse,she’scryingout,‘Wherearethey,wherearethey?
’
Monica:
Well,she’snotgoingtofindthemlyinginthegrasslikethat.
(Theyflipthroughthepagestoanotherpicture.)
Phoebe:
Oh,yeah.Aw,rememberthedayswhenyouusedtogoouttothebarn,liftupyourshirt,andbendover?
RachelandMonica:
Yeah.
Rachel:
Yousee,now,Iwoulddatethisgirl.She’scute,she’soutdoorsy,youknow,andsheknowshowtobuildafire.Imean,that’sgottocomeinhandy
Monica:
Okay,I’vegotaquestion.Ifyouhadtopickoneofustodate,whowoulditbe?
Rachel:
(thinks)Idon’tknow.
Monica:
Meneither.
Phoebe:
Rachel.
Monica:
What?
!
Phoebe:
Idon’tknow.(Pause)Meneither.
[Scene:
CentralPerk,Joey,Chandler,andRossaresittingonthecouch.]
Joey:
YouforgethowmanygreatsongsHearthad.
Chandler:
Yeah.
Ross:
Youknow,BarracudawasthefirstsongIlearnedtoplayonthekeyboard.
Chandler:
So,youheardit,yourepeatedit,sothatmustmeanyouwroteit.
Joey:
Oh,youguys,withthisjoke.Igottasay,IknowIcrackedup,butI’mnotevensureIgotit.
Ross:
What,youdidn’tgetit?
Thedoctorisamonkey.
(HeandChandlercrackup.)
Chandler:
Andmonkeyscan’twriteoutprescriptions.
(HeandRosscrackupagain.Joeyjustsitsthere)
Chandler:
(stopslaughing,toRoss)Youarenotallowedtolaughatmyjoke.
Ross:
Yourjoke?
Well,Ithink‘theHef’woulddisagree,whichiswhyhesentmeacheckforonehundredah-dollars.
Chandler:
So,youstolemyjoke,andyoustolemymoney.
Ross:
Well,IwasgoingtostickitintheATM,butnowIthinkI’llshowthesexytellerthatIamapublishedwriter.
Chandler:
Well,sheisgoingtoknowthatyoustolethejoke.
Ross:
Oh,whatareyougoingtodo,followmedownthere?
Chandler:
Yeah!
Ross:
Well,I’mnotgoingtogonowanyway(hegoestositdown).
Chandler:
Okay(hegoestositdown).
(Rossleapsoutofhischairandrunsoutthedoor,withChandlerinhotpursuit.)
Gunther:
(handingJoeythebill)Hereyougo.
Joey:
Ah,Gunther,Ican’tpayforthisrightnowbecauseI’mnotworking,soI’vehadtocutdownonsomeluxurieslikeuh,payin’forstuff.
Gunther:
Well,ifyouwant,youcanworkhere.
Joey:
Uh,Idon’tknow.Yasee,it’sjust,seeIwasaregularonasoapoperay’know?
Andtogofromthattothis,Ijust…Plus,I’dhavetowaitonallmyfriends.
Gunther:
Okay,butthemoney’sgood,plusyougettostareatRachelasmuchasyouwant.
Joey:
What?
!
Gunther:
Flexiblehours.
Joey:
MaybeIcouldbeawaiter.CouldIusethephone?
[Scene:
MonicaandChandler’sbedroom,theyareinbedtogether.]
Monica:
(visiblyupset)ShepickedRachel.Imean,shetriedtobackoutofit,butitwasobvious.ShepickedRachel.
Chandler:
(visiblyupset)Hetookmyjoke,hetookit.
Monica:
It’swrong.Youknowwhatelseiswrong?
PhoebepickingRachel.
Chandler:
YouknowwhoelsepickedRachel?
Ross,andyouknowwhatelseRossdid?
Hestolemyjoke.Youknowwhat?
I’mgoingtogetajokejournal.Y’know?
Anddocumentthedateandtimeofeverysingleoneofmyjokes.
Monica:
That’sagoodidea.
Chandler:
Yeah!
Monica:
Doyouknowwhat’sabadidea?
Chandler:
PickingRachel.
Monica:
That’sright.(Anoisecomesfromthelivingroom.)Didyouhearsomething?
Chandler:
Maybeit’sthesoundofRossclimbingintomybrainandstealingmythoughts.
Monica:
It’scomingfromthelivingroom.
(Theygoouttoinvestigate,andfindJoeywrappedinablanketwatchingtheirtelevision.)
Joey:
(sheepishly)Ifinishedmybook.(ChandlerandMonicaslowlyretreatbacktobed.)
[Scene,PhoebeandRachel’s,they’resittingtogetheronthecouch.]
Monica:
(entering)Hey,youguys.
PhoebeandRachel:
Hey.
Monica:
(laughing)Oh,d
on’tyouguyslookcute.Youguysmakesuchacutecouple.
Rachel:
Monica,whatareyoudoing?
Monica:
(laughingharder)Nothing,I’mjusttryingtorecreatesomeofthefunthatwehadatmyplacetheotherday.(ToPhoebe)Remember,whenyoupickedRacheloverme?
Thatwasfunny.
Phoebe:
Ig
uessitwaskindafunny.
Monica:
(angrily)Itwasn’tfunnyatall!
Whywouldyoudothat?
Whydidn’tyoupickme?
Phoebe:
Fine.ThereasonthatIwasleaningalittlebitmoretowardRachelthanyouisjustthatyou’re…just…kindahighmaintenance—Okaylet’sgotolunch!
Monica:
Thatiscompletelyuntrue.YouthinkI’mhighmaintenance?
Okay,proveit.Iwantyoutomakealistandwe’regoingtogothroughitpointbypoint!
Phoebe:
No,okay,you’reright.You’reeasy-going.You’rejustnotaseasy-goingasRachel.She’sjustmoreflexibleand-andmellow.That’sall.
Rachel:
(ToMonica)Well,peoplearedifferent.
Phoebe:
Ya,youknow,Rachel…she’lldowhateveryouwant.Y’know,youcanjustwalkalloverher.
Rachel:
What?
Waitaminute.Whatareyousaying,thatI’mapushover?
I’mnotapushover.
Phoebe:
Oh,okay,(laughing)you’renotapushover.
Rachel:
Ohmy…youthinkI’mapushover.Wellwait,watchthis,youknowwhat?
You’renotinvitedtolunch.Whatdoyouthinkofthat?
Ithinkthat’sprettystrong,that’swhatIthink.Comeon,Monica,let’sgotolunch.(Sheleaves)
Monica:
(toPhoebe)Youstartworkingonthatlist.(Shegrabshercoatandleaves,
too.)
[Cuttothehallway.]
Rachel:
Icannotbelieveher.
Monica:
Iknow.Wheredoyouwannagoeat?
Rachel:
Oh,oh,IlovethatJapaneseplace.
Monica:
I’msickofJapanese.We’renotgoingthere.
Rachel:
Allright,whereveryouwannagoiscool.
Monica:
Allright.
[Scene:
CentralPerk,Monica,Rachel,andChandlerarethereasRossentersandseesGunther.]
Ross:
(showingthePlayboymagazinetoGunther)Oh,hey,Gunther,checkthisout.
(Guntherlooksatthejokeandlaughs.)
Gunther:
Yeah,that-thatChandlercracksmeup.
(Rossbeginstosaysomething,realizeswhatGuntherjustsaid,turns,andglaresatChandler.Chandlerjustshrugsitoff.)
Joey:
HeyRoss,listen,youwantanythingtodrink,‘causeI’mheadingupthere.
Ross:
Uh,yeah,I’lltakeacoffee.Thanks,man.
Joey:
Sure.(To