喜剧天王金凯瑞在玛赫西管理大学毕业典礼英语演讲稿文档格式.docx
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ExcusemeifIseemalittlelowenergytonight—today—whateverthisis.IsleptwithmyheadtotheNorthlastnight.(laughter)Ohman!
Ohman!
Youknowhowthatis,rightkids?
WokeuprightinthemiddleofPittaandcouldn’tgetbacktosleeptillVatarolledaround,butIdidn’tfreakout.IusedthattimetoeatalargemealandconnectwithsomeonespecialonTinder.(laughter)
Lifedoesn’thappentoyou,ithappensforyou.HowdoIknowthis?
Idon’t,butI’mmakingsound,andthat’stheimportantthing.That’swhatI’mheretodo.Sometimes,Ithinkthat’soneoftheonlythingsthatareimportant.Justlettingeachotherknowwe’rehere,remindingeachotherthatwearepartofalargerself.IusedtothinkJimCarreyisallthatIwas...
Justaflickeringlight
Adancingshadow
Thegreatnothingmasqueradingassomethingyoucanname
Dwellinginfortsandcastlesmadeofwitches–wishes!
Sorry,aFreudianslipthere
Seekingshelterincavesandfoxholes,dugouthastily
Anarchersearchingforhistargetinthemirror
Woundedonlybymyownarrows
Beggingtobeenslaved
Pleadingformychains
Blindedbylongingandtrippingoverparadise–canIgetan“Amen”?
!
(applause)
Youdidn’tthinkIcouldbeseriousdidya’?
Idon'
tthinkyouunderstandwhoyou'
redealingwith!
Ihavenolimits!
IcannotbecontainedbecauseI’mthecontainer.Youcan’tcontainthecontainer,man!
Youcan’tcontainthecontainer!
IusedtobelievethatwhoIwasendedattheedgeofmyskin,thatIhadbeengiventhislittlevehiclecalledabodyfromwhichtoexperiencecreation,andthoughIcouldn’thaveaskedforasportiermodel,(laughter)itwasafterallaloanerandwouldhavetobereturned.Then,Ilearnedthateverythingoutsidethevehiclewasapartofme,too,andnowIdriveaconvertible.Topdownwindinmyhair!
Iamelatedandtruly,truly,trulyexcitedtobepresentandfullyconnectedtoyouatthisimportantmomentinyourjourney.Ihopeyou’rereadytoopentheroofandtakeitallin?
(audiencedoesn’treact)Okay,fourmoreyearsthen!
IwanttothanktheTrustees,AdministratorsandFacultyofMUMforcreatinganinstitutionworthyofMaharishi’sidealsofeducation.Aplacethatteachestheknowledgeandexperiencenecessarytobeproductiveinlife,aswellasenablingthestudents,throughTranscendentalMeditationandancientVedicknowledgetoslackofftwiceadayforanhourandahalf!
(laughter)—don’tthinkyou’refoolingme!
—(applause)but,Iguessithassomebenefits.Itdoesallowyoutoseparatewhoyoutrulyareandwhat’sreal,fromthestoriesthatrunthroughyourhead.
Youhavegiventhemtheabilitytowalkbehindthemind’selaboratesetdecoration,andtoseethatthereisahugedifferencebetweenadogthatisgoingtoeatyouinyourmindandanactualdogthat’sgoingtoeatyou.(laughter)Thatmaysoundlikenobigdeal,butmanyneverlearnthatdistinctionandspendagreatdealoftheirliveslivinginfightorflightresponse.
I’dliketoacknowledgeallyouwonderfulparents—waytogoforthefantasticjobyou’vedone—foryourtirelessdedication,yourlove,yoursupport,andmostofall,fortheattentionyou’vepaidtoyourchildren.Ihaveasaying,“Bewaretheunloved,”becausetheywilleventuallyhurtthemselves...orme!
ButwhenIlookatthisgroupheretoday,Ifeelreallysafe!
Ido!
I’mjustgoingtosayit—myroomisnotlocked!
Myroomisnotlocked!
(laughter)Nodoubtsomeofyouwillturnouttobecrooks!
Butwhite-collarstuff—WallSt.ya’know,thattypeofthing—crimescommittedbypeoplewithself-esteem!
Stuffaparentcanstillbeproudofinaweirdway.(laughter)
Andtothegraduatingclassof2019—minus3!
Youdidn'
tletmefinish!
(laughter)—Congratulations!
(applause)Yes,giveyourselvesaroundofapplause,please.Youarethevanguardofknowledgeandconsciousness;
anewwaveinavastoceanofpossibilities.Ontheothersideofthatdoor,thereisaworldstarvingfornewleadership,newideas.
I’vebeenouttherefor30years!
She’sawildcat!
(laughter)Oh,she’llrubupagainstyourlegandpurruntilyoupickherupandstartpettin’her,andoutofnowhereshe’llswatyouintheface.Sureit’sroughsometimesbutthat’sOK,‘causethey’vegotsoftserveicecreamwithsprinkles!
(laughter)Iguessthat’swhatI’mreallyheretosay;
sometimesit’sokaytoeatyourfeelings!
Fearisgoingtobeaplayerinyourlife,butyougettodecidehowmuch.Youcanspendyourwholelifeimaginingghosts,worryingaboutyourpathwaytothefuture,butalltherewilleverbeiswhat’shappeninghere,andthedecisionswemakeinthismoment,whicharebasedineitherloveorfear.
Somanyofuschooseourpathoutoffeardisguisedaspracticality.Whatwereallywantseemsimpossiblyoutofreachandridiculoustoexpect,soweneverdaretoasktheuniverseforit.I’msaying,I’mtheproofthatyoucanasktheuniverseforit—please!
(applause)Andifitdoesn'
thappenforyourightaway,it’sonlybecausetheuniverseissobusyfulfillingmyorder.It’spartysize!
Myfathercouldhavebeenagreatcomedian,buthedidn’tbelievethatwaspossibleforhim,andsohemadeaconservativechoice.Instead,hegotasafejobasanaccountant,andwhenIwas12yearsold,hewasletgofromthatsafejobandourfamilyhadtodowhateverwecouldtosurvive.
Ilearnedmanygreatlessonsfrommyfather,nottheleastofwhichwasthatyoucanfailatwhatyoudon’twant,soyoumightaswelltakeachanceondoingwhatyoulove.(applause)
That’snottheonlythinghetaughtmethough:
Iwatchedtheaffectmyfather’sloveandhumorhadontheworldaroundme,andIthought,“That’ssomethingtodo,that’ssomethingworthmytime.”
Itwasn’tlongbeforeIstartedactingup.Peoplewouldcomeovertomyhouseandtheywouldbegreetedbya7yearoldthrowinghimselfdownalargeflightofstairs.(laughter)Theywouldsay,“Whathappened?
”AndIwouldsay,“Idon'
tknow—let’scheckthereplay.”AndIwouldgobacktothetopofthestairsandcomebackdowninslowmotion.(Jimreenactscomingdownthestairsinslow-mo)Itwasaverystrangehousehold.(laughter)
MyfatherusedtobragthatIwasn’taham—Iwasthewholepig.Andhetreatedmytalentasifitwashissecondchance.WhenIwasabout28,afteradecadeasaprofessionalcomedian,IrealizedonenightinLAthatthepurposeofmylifehadalwaysbeentofreepeoplefromconcern,likemydad.WhenIrealizedthis,Idubbedmynewdevotion,“TheChurchofFreedomFromConcern”—“TheChurchofFFC”—andIdedicatedmyselftothatministry.
What’syours?
Howwillyouservetheworld?
Whatdotheyneedthatyourtalentcanprovide?
That’sallyouhavetofigureout.Assomeonewhohasdonewhatyouareabouttogodo,Icantellyoufromexperience,theeffectyouhaveonothersisthemostvaluablecurrencythereis.(applause)
Everythingyougaininlifewillrotandfallapart,andallthatwillbeleftofyouiswhatwasinyourheart.Mychoosingtofreepeoplefromconcerngotmetothetopofamountain.LookwhereIam—lookwhatIgettodo!
EverywhereIgo–andI’mgoingtogetemotionalbecausewhenItapintothis,itreallyisextraordinarytome—IdidsomethingthatmakespeoplepresenttheirbestselvestomewhereverIgo.(applause)IamatthetopofthemountainandtheonlyoneIhadn’tfreedwasmyselfandthat’swhenmysearchforidentitydeepened.
IwonderedwhoI’dbewithoutmyfame.WhowouldIbeifIsaidthingsthatpeopledidn’twanttohear,orifIdefiedtheirexpectationsofme?
WhatifIshoweduptothepartywithoutmyMardiGrasmaskandIrefusedtoflashmybreastsforahandfulofbeads?
(laughter)I’llgiveyouamomenttowipethatimageoutofyourmind.(laughter)
Butyouguysarewayaheadofthegame.Youalreadyknowwhoyouareandthatpeace,thatpeacethatwe’reafter,liessomewherebeyondpersonality,beyondtheperceptionofothers,beyondinventionanddisguise,evenbeyondeffortitself.Youcanjointhegame,fightthewars,playwithformallyouwant,buttofindrealpeace,youhavetoletthearmorfall.Yourneedforacceptancecanmakeyouinvisibleinthisworld.Don’tletanythingstandinthewayofthelightthatshinesthroughthisform.Riskbeingseeninallofyourglory.(AsheetdropsandrevealsJim’spainting.Applause.)
(Re:
thepainting)It’snotbigenough!
(kidding)Thispaintingisbigforareason.Thispaintingiscalled“HighVisibility.”(laughter)It’saboutpickingupthelightanddaringtobeseen.Here’sthetrickypart.Everyoneisattractedtothelight.Thepartyhostupinthecorner(referstopainting)whothinksunconsciousnessisblissandisalwaysofferingadrinkfromthebottlesthatemptyyou;
Misery,belowher,whodespisesthelight—can’tstandwhenyou’redoingwell—andwishesyounothingbuttheworst;
T